Merry Christmas ^^

To: Everyone...

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* MERRY CHRISTMAS *
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From: Vincentia Vianney V. C. W.

Ps: ini bukti bahwa gw ga ada kerjaan lain di malam Natal


Plus: D#$%, I spent so many minutes to make it, but the blogger erased the form :( It's supposed to be a Christmas Tree!!!!!!!!!!!
A nice, good looking, cute Christmas Tree!!!!!!!!
:(
Oh well, do look and think of it as a Christmas Tree!!!!
:D

Lonely Christmas

----------------

Today is Christmas Eve..
bur for a person that celebrates it alone, today is just another day..

Yes.. I miss my family far away from here
that I'm so sure they are having a big feast over there like always..

I miss my friends
and I'm sure they are with their family having fun

If I were there, with my family,
I would have no time to sit in front of my laptop
I would wear my best dress
having a gala dinner
chat and taking pictures with my cousins
waiting for midnight,
waiting for the presents to come..

This is the third Christmas in a row that I spent without them
I guess, this is the price that I have to pay
for my pride of independence
going to adulthood

I'm no longer a child
nor a teenager
that live sheltered under the family's wings

Before, I don't hate the idea of living alone
even for the rest of my life
I think I would like that
without any strings that would bind me to things
that I don't really like

But spending such a festive night alone
I start to imagine,
maybe someday
when I have my own familiy
this day would be festive again
just like my childhood days

Yes.. this thought surprised me
I thought I would be fine alone
even when my friend that was living alone told me not to
she told me to find a husband someday
living alone is too lonely
I replied 'well, I could handle it'
but now...
maybe she's right

.......

-------------------------

Me, you, Us...

we used to be so close
and now that we are apart

is it me?
is it you?
or... is it us?

could it be possibly the winter?
or it might be was just the game?

when we lost it
we lost us too

or is it time to be blame
for not going around like it used to be
for me
for you
for us??

or maybe.. it is true
that I've changed
my world move fast
and yours stand still

it hurts to think
to know what's been lost

when memories are questioned
when we ran out of words
for you
for me
for us??

it's painful to imagine
yet it's keep coming

and now...
the fire's lit,
and what is it that it'll burn?

--------------------------------------

Mules...

-----

kudengar gemuruh
mengguncang tubuh
hati mengeruh
tubuhku rapuh

perasaanku tak enak
intuisiku tak baik

tak lama lagi
dapat kukatakan
kukan kembali berlari
bersembunyi di ruang kecil

kudengar gemuruh
mengguncang tubuh
hati mengeruh
tubuhku rapuh

yang menghantuiku sejak
siang tadi

-------------

Terinspirasi dari keadaan perut yang sungguh tak enak..
dan didorong oleh rasa sesal telah menghabiskan ice cream itu tadi siang.......
T.T

trying snowboarding

Yup..
besok.. will be the first time I'll try snow boarding
olahraga yang populer banget di kalangan anak muda swiss
hm...
never tried it before, it's time to try :D
I'm not good with cold.. I know, I do love snow, but I can't stay with them for long
well, I got to try at least once right?
:D

besok is going to be the day..

yah.. walau sebenernya badan ini masih pegel linu gara" horse riding kemaren...
tapi...
semoga semoga semoga besok udah ga pegel" lagi :D

udah siapin kompress panas nih.. buat menghilangkan pegal linu di badan hehehe

waaaa I'm so excited..
though in the same time... nervous, anxious, and afraid
I'm afraid that it's not going to be a pleasant time for me..
I'm afraid that it's going to be too cold or rough for me..

well,
I got to try to find out right?
maybe I'm going to enjoy it
maybe I'm going to love it
who knows....

^^

Holiday

Akhirnya....
setelah report rally that equals to the hell of my life.....

' 'I'M ON HOLIDAY' '

yup that's right.... :D

Yah.. walaupun ga 100% holiday sih.. berhubung masih ada holiday report dan final exam yang mesti dipersiapkan.... T.T

2 weeks holiday would fly like a tornado T.T

But you know what?? for this moment, I don't care... I'm in a full holiday mood. It's 3.45 AM, my last report just been due, I'm not sleepy at all.. and YES it's officially my holiday!!!!!!!!!

^^

nothing else matter :D



Holiday plan:

• snowboarding
• horse riding
• read novels
• go to Lucerne
• find an apartment
• think slowly again about dslr
• managerial accounting report
• marketing case study
• HR & management principles review
• HAVE FUN!!
  

Hidup liburan!!
Long live holiday!!
God bless the holiday!!!

My lovely fellow school mates....

I lived in an international campus with high standard of business and formalities. Oh well, that's what officially is.. but in actual real life... There are a bunch of party animals, more than humans in number that actually reside in the same place as I do.

They aren't capable of paying respect at all, others are invincible, the only thing matter is themselves. Rules and regulations are never heard of by them. The only thing in their eyes are alcohol, sex, fun, alcohol, alcohol and oh.. alcohol.

Here's a simple truth and fact about how inconsiderate these people could be, or how.. uncivilized in a simple matter. This is an actual e-mail that I received today from our Operation Director with little editing, for the sake of my own prove of graduation paper....

-------------------------------------------------------------

Ladies and Gentleman

You may know that most of our standard rooms don't have bathroom. For this reason some student have to use the public shower and bathroom available. For the same reason we have shower dedicated to one gender only

Please respect the following knowing that someone caught in a bathroom not for his gender will get deduction point for inappropriate behavior

Public shower & bathroom on FAI 2nd floor: Female

Public shower & bathroom on FAI 3rd floor: Male

Public shower & bathroom on FAI 4th floor: Female in the East wing - Male in the West wing

Public shower & bathroom on FAI 5th floor: Female in the East wing - Male in the West wing

The East wing is room between (550 - 557)

The West wing is room between (436 - 444)

It also has come to our attention that some of you do not understand the use of shower curtains. The shower curtain helps you to avoid having water in the whole bathroom while taking a shower.

Please co-operate and use the bathroom accordingly.

Thank for you attention

Yours sincerely,

Patrick de Quietbus

------------------------------------------------------

Mr Patrick de Quitbus, Director of Operations

----------------------------------------------

repoooooooorrrtttsssssssss

Guess what happen this week?
Yup... that's right, REPORT-RALLY!!!!
Amazing isn't it??
4 report deadlines in a week... not counting the deadlines from the previous weeks!!
It's very common and predictable to have a or some mental breakdowns, yes it is very reasonable and understandable..
Well, what do you think will happen if you put 2 girls in a room, give 4 deadlines in a week with an effect camera???

Actually there are lots and lots more.. seriously!!!
But... well... er....
Yea, just leave it at that.....

------------------------------------

Okay, the next day.... Here's the update,

• 1 report is down
• second report is almost finished
• the third report is unknown, but for sure almost finished
• the last report..... I don't want to think about it yet
  
• felt really bad because my camera is DEAD (yeah, ladies and gentleman, it's dead, RIP my lovely camera.... T.T)
  
• got a ticket for a friend's party
• really want to do the report, but felt obliged to at least show up

So... I showed up, starting to get ready just 15 minutes before the actual event start, so.. very not prepared for a party actually.. The party is 'SECRET', and it really is, we don't even know where it's going to be!! (well, I knew though, coz I saw the organizers ran back & forth to a certain room lol)

We were blindfolded then was led to the room, it was amazing, honest, it's a big classroom that I just went in the morning, plain big classroom. Guess, I can't even recognize the room if I didn't know before hand... Okay, I would recognize it after a minute, but still it was impressive.

The party at first was just so-so, and they have a table for BlackJack, got $50 chip as initial capital, I knew how to play it, just never tried it before. So, I decided to try, and... it turns out.. I love it. I was losing at first, but then start winning :D

Yay, I could say I was almost staying by the table the whole night. Well the entertainment then became more interesting, plus I'm getting a champagne, that kinda building my party mood in an instant too. The competitions was funny, it's worth cheering and laughing.

So, I was planning to stay there for a while, guess what? 'Nah.... I'll stay till the end, my second report is almost finished anyway." Then, I'm ending in having chips worth $230, well, just chips, no real money involved, but still it was so much fun. And.... I'm getting a lucky draw!!! The first time in my life I got something just for being lucky!!! It's a poker set, and they called me 'Poker Face'. Well, judging I won a poker set and I was by the gambling table more than half of the night.. yeah I guess I deserved it (though it was my first time trying! lol).


Well, at that night, I felt like very very lucky (forgetting about the death of the camera)... Thanks for my 2 luck ladies, my best friends, Cindy and Kiki. :D

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Butler

This job always fascinate me , an idea of being a professional personal assistant, or to be more precise, the idea of HAVING one.. lol
Kalo di indo bisa dibilang ini perkerjaan yang sangat mirip dengan pekerjaan Pembantu Rumah Tangga, bedanya, yang ini professional, hanya dimiliki oleh kelas elit dan dibayar tinggi banget. Pernah juga sih kepikiran untuk mencoba pekerjaan ini, kan otomatis kerjaannya bareng kelas elit melulu, lumayan buat bangun koneksi untuk masa depan, sekaligus siapa tau bisa kenalan sama millioner single muda yang cakep, asyik!!!! hahahahaha *mimpi dan bercanda abiz*
Tadi pagi internship office kirim e-mail pengumuman, ada yang nyari butler service dari skolah gw.. hm... saat dibaca.. oke asyik juga, liat bayarannya... wow.. menggiurkan!! Sayang saya sudah punya internship job dan juga memang tidak memenuhi kualifikasinya hahahahaha.

Berikut ini e-mail dari si ibu dari kontor internship:

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JOB DESCRIPTION

An international business man is hiring a personal assistant/chef who will be in charge of cooking and serving meals for himself and his guests in the following locations: New York (50% of time), Switzerland and Hong Kong (the other 50% of the time). He or she will need to cook vegetarian, continental, asian and indian cuisine. A one month training on “House Recipes” is planned at start of the job. The client is tired of eating in restaurants and would like some excellent home cooked meals.

He or she is going to travel alone in advance in order to prepare the accommodations for the business man. He will also be in charge of other additional administration and house services.

The ideal candidate must fluently speak English, knowledge of French is plus. He will need to demonstrate outstanding cooking and serving skills, an exceptional sense of hospitality, be passionate for perfection, have good education, discrete and fully reliable.

He or she must be able to work independently, with total availability and flexibility. He or she will check and report all expenses for traveling, food & beverage and house expenses.

He or she must have an international driving licence, and be Swiss, European, US, CAN or Hong Kong (HKSAR) nationality. Lodging facilities can be provided in Hong Kong, but the candidate can also be living on his own in New York or Switzerland as well.

He or she must have technical skills for emails, correspondence and administrative tasks.

Annual salary: 50’000-65’000 US$.

If you are the person that they're looking for please send me your CV, copies of certificates, driving license and motivation letter. Only serious and qualified candidates files will be forwarded.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

The Objective and Operational Plan of My Life

Objective:

Become an owner of an event company worth CHF 35000 by the age of 30

Operational plan:

Short term:

• finished third year by January 2010
• Do my third internship as receptionist/SPA at SHMS at the end of January-July 2010
• Save CHF 1000 during the internship
  
• Back to my home country on August 2010
• Do my BA term in SHMS from September 2010-March 2011
  
• Do managerial training in a five star Hotel 2011-2012
• Save CHF 2000 during the managerial training
  

Long term:

• 2012 - 2016 work in at least 3 star hotel that relates to events
• Save CHF 40000 during the work in hotel
  
• 2016-2019 work in an event company
• Save CHF 36000 during work in event company
  
• 2019 started my own event company with the asset worth CHF 35000
  

Note:
Plans and objective could be revised and updated anytime without any prior notice.

Ps: Believe it or not, this is a task for Managerial Accounting in my university, and we have to present it!!!!!! Exciting isn't it?
(reading instruction: with a sarcastic intonation)

School Interview

wow... so much had happen in the past few days....

Ada phone interview disneyland Paris hari Jumat, trus ada Omar's Banquet on Saturday, trus Reception/SPA interview tadi siang... dan email yang baru saja gw terima, I got the job on Reception/SPA in my school!!

Mumpung masih fresh, mau tau kronologis interviewnya?

13.45

Dapet break dari kelas Logistic & Events yang terletak di lantai 6, dan tersadarlah gw, 'Oh My God, bentar lagi gw interview!!!'. Turunlah gw ke lantai 3 tempat SEG office berada dan itu adalah ruangan yang akan menjadi ruangan interview gw. Gw intip ke dalem, kosong. Gw liat ke sekeliling, ga ada tanda-tanda orang yang akan menginterview gw. Eits... siapa mereka? Gw ga tau... Nah lo..
Pasalnya, gw juga ga ng-apply nih internship, gw emang tertarik sama internship ini, tapi rencananya buat taon depan. Para receptionist yang kerja di sekolah emang udah kenal ama gw gara-gara gw kerja di sekolah taon pertama dulu, jadilah kita lumayan akrab, dan jadilah juga nama gw ini dimasukin ke dalem list walaupun gw ga apply. Berhubung gw blom dapet internship, waktu gw dapet email interview, 'why not? toh ga ada ruginya'. hehe
"Are you waiting for the interview?" tanya seseorang di belakang gw, buyar deh lamunan gw. Dia salah satu receptionist di sekolah gw, dia emang baik banget, tapi jujur, gw ga tau nama dia siapa, dan cuma dia seorang yang namanya gw ga tau. And yang pasti, ga mungkin dong gw nanya.... taroh di mana nih muka. Ntar gw pasti tau kok nama dia siapa. :D
"Yes"
"It's at 2 right? It's still 10 minutes. Don't be nervous, it's ok."
"Yeah... and oh ya, do you know who's going to give the interview?"
"It's going to be me.... Sonia.. and Sepibus. It's going to be ok, no worries"
"Ok. Thanks"
Oooo.. gw dah ga terlalu gugup deh klo gitu. Sonia juga receptionist dan dia temen gw, kita sama-sama pecinta horse riding. Sepibus.. nah ini orang salah satu managerial tingkat atas, jadi gw ga pernah ngobrol-ngobrol ma dia. Wew.. 3 orang sekali interview....

14.00

Ada temen gw dateng, gw liat di list, dia bakal interview sesudah gw. Kita mengobrollah, dia pun gugup ga tau mau ntar mau jawab apa klo ditanya macem-macem. Ya gw bantu aja cari jawaban buat dia. Nah, akhirnya para interviewer mulai masuk ruangan, tapi kita masih blom dipanggil nih... bingung. Eh, masuklah satu lagi, perawat sekolah merangkap manager SPA&leisure, gw kenal sih, biasanya kita bisa ngobrol, tapi 2 hari yang lalu pas ketemu dia kayaknya rada jengkel karena gw ga apply tapi kok dipanggil... Jadi.. agak takut gitu dengan kehadiran dia. Oke.. 4 orang di dalem.. hm.. mulai agak gugup juga nih, tapi masih blom juga dipanggil.....

14.10

Satu lagi orang managerial tingkat tinggi, salah satu orang yang ga bisa diajak ngomong dengan mudah, masuk..... Wadaw... 5 orang!!!!! Gw ama temen gw langsung panas dingin.. 'ini interview apaan sih? Cuma internship doang kan??? Internship receptionist/SPA doang kan... bukan managerial position??? Kok banyak banget orang di dalem!!!'. Lalu keluarlah si manager yang paling terakhir masuk tadi, manggil gw.... 'OMG'.... dan masuklah gw ke dalam ruangan yang auranya sangat mengintimidasikan itu.
Okay.. mereka semuanya tersenyum dengan ramah, dan mulai hilanglah rasa nervousku. Dan ternyata, tu orang yang tadi manggil gw keluar ruangan. 'Amiiin, ternyata cuma 4, ya walaupun masih banyak sih, tapi lumayan daripada 5'. Dan dimulailah interviewku..

"Explain to us who are you"
"Do you know what kind of activities that you can have in Leysin?"
"Are you confident if you have to lead students to a place that you have never been before?"
"What will you do if the students missing?"
"Do you like sports? What kind of sports that you do?"
"If you have to walk alone late at night, are you scared?"
"What is it that will make us choose you and not anyone else?"

Nah pertanyaan terakhir ini dia yang paling susah dijawab, gw butuh diam dulu untuk mikir sejenak.. lalu.. Mulailah daku dengan "ya.. daku sudah kenal lingkungan sekolah, sudah tau anak-anaknya kayak apa, lalu juga setelah semester selesai, datanglah para anak-anak kecil.. and... 'it's going to be fun'". Lalu mereka pun tertawa semua. Well, kata-kata 'it's going to be fun' itu dalam majas ironis, kan ga mungkin dong kalo gw bilang 'mereka sangat menyebalkan' walaupun gw yakin mereka juga sependapat ama gw.
Semester Febuari tuh akan selesai bulan Mei, dan semester selanjutnya dimulai bulan September. Dan tentunya sekolah gw yang amat sangat bisnis type ini tidak akan membiarkan propertinya diam tanpa menhasilkan uang, maka diciptakanlah program Summer Camp untuk anak-anak Eropa belajar Inggris dan Prancis. Perlu diketahui, anak-anak ini sungguh diluar kendali, tak punya sopan santun, berlagak sangat dewasa, arogan, super duper nakal.. (kalo dilanjutin ga akan selesai). They really live up to their nickname given by the whole school staff, 'little devils/little bastards'.
Gw yakin banget tuh para orang tua happy banget ada program kayak gini, mereka jadinya bisa lepas dari anak-anak mereka yang nakal-nakal itu selama 3 minggu penuh!!!!

Short and long, interview gw selesai. Satu stengah jam berikutnya, gw dapet email yang memberitahukan bahwa gw diterima!!! hahahahahahaha.

Guru Akutansiku

Tahukah anda bahwa aku sedang membenci seseorang... IA adalah seorang wanita yang baru saya kenal beberapa bulan. Beberapa bulan ini saya menghormatinya, dan saya menyesalinya. IA bukan orang yang patut mendapatkan rasa hormat itu. IA hanya seorang wanita yang berpikiran dengan logika numerologis yang dibutakan oleh emosi.

Emosinya yang sungguh tinggi itu, sering meledak-ledak dan merendahkan orang lain dengan gaya dan cara sinisnya. Tentu saja, tak sedikit orang yang mulai menghindarinya, tak lagi bicara padanya, dan pastinya kehilangan antusias untuk mendengar kata-katanya.

Berkali-kali IA berteriak nyaring melengkin-lengking dengan kasar di depan kami. Kami menghormatinya dan diam. Saat IA menyindir dengan sinisnya yang membuat kami merasa bodoh, kami hanya menghela nafas, 'roll the eyes' dan diam. Saat IA memberi tugas untuk membaca 1 bab penuh jam 9 malam untuk sebelum kelas jam 8 pagi keesokan harinya, kami hanya diam. Disaat teman-temanku muak padanya dan tak mau mengerjakan tugas yang IA berikan, aku dan ke-empat temanku tetap mengerjakannya, empat dari puluhan murid yang lain dan IA sungguh marah. Saat itu IA bagaikan seekor naga murka yang bernafaskan api.

Di kelas lain... tiba-tiba ia lebih sabar.. Ia walau tetap menyindir, tetapi memberi penjelasan lebih lanjut. IA memberi informasi dan waktu yang lebih pada mereka. Mereka yang tak satupun mengerjakan tugas, ditolerir olehnya.

Dan tetap, aku menghormatinya, tapi hanya sampai tadi pagi...

Tadi pagi, aku mendapatkan hasil dari semua jerih payahku. Tak pernah sekalipun dalam hidupku aku gagal untuk mencapai apa yang harus dicapai, apalagi dalam bidang yang IA kini menjadi dewanya. Untuk pertama kalinya dalam sejarah hidupku, aku gagal. Pernahkan terbesit dalam benakku bahwa aku akan gagal? Tidak! Aku bahkan tak ragu untuk hal itu. Ternyata, tak hanya aku, begitu pula teman-temanku, semuanya gagal.

Tetapi mereka yang di kelas lain, sedikit yang gagal. Bahkan mereka yang tak mengerti pun dapat lulus dengan hasil yang memuaskan.

Lalu.. dapatkah kuterima bahwa keputusan IA yang kini menjadi dewa, adil?? Tidak! dan hilanglah pula semua rasa hormat yang kumiliki sebelumnya padanya. IA menilai dan dibutakan dengan emosi. IA menjadi subjektif dengan angka-angkanya.

Saat dengan halus kubertanya apakah yang kurang, sehingga aku dapat memperbaikinya untuk langkah selanjutnya.. IA dengan angkuhnya berkata 'Semuanya Salah', analisis-analisisnya, kesangkut-pautan angka-angkanya, urutan kata-katanya, semuanya salah. IA bahkan tak ambil pusing untuk bertanya yang mana karyaku dari sekian banyak karya-karya yang lain, dengan yakinnya IA berkata demikian.

Maka habis pula lah rasa masa kebodohanku padanya, dari petunjuk-petunjuk yang IA berikan, dengan yakin telah aku dan teman-temanku curahkan pada karya kami. Jelaslah, IA, tidak tahu yang mana karya kami, atau bahkan, munkin saja IA bahkan tidak perlu membaca untuk menilai karya-karya kami, cukup dari emosinya saja.

Dari masa bodoh, aku pun mulai membencinya. IA yang tidak bertindak adil dan hanya dipenuhi oleh dirinya sendiri, keegoisannya, dan kepuasan batinnya. Aku pun tak lagi berharap untuk kebahagiaannya.

Untitled

Saat ini aku sedang merasakan yang namanya kemunduran dalam sosialisasi. saat dimana teman- teman yang tadinya aku percaya, kini tak lagi dapat kupercaya. Walau perubahan ini tak ditunjukkan secara terang-terangan, but please.. do you think I'm that stupid? Jangan pikir karena mereka berbicara dengan bahasa yang tak dapat kumengerti dan aku akan have no clue at all?? Pernahkah mereka dengar dengan yang namanya body language? It's universal. Dari nada bicara dan gerak gerik tentu orang akan mengerti.

Dengan senyum-senyum palsu mereka aku berasa seperti dipergunakan. Disayang-sayang saat dibutuhkan, dan saat tak dibutuhkan, dibuang diam-diam. Capek rasanya berpura-pura tidak tahu. Untuk terang-terangan berkata 'Aku tahu!!'... jujur, aku tak sanggup, aku tak sanggup menyakiti hubungan yang masih ada diantara kami, bagaimanapun, mereka orang-orang yang pernah kuhargai keberadaannya dalam hidupku.

Kadang aku bingung bagaimana cara menghadapinya...
Ku tak mau terlalu dekat dengan mereka, walau tak terbakar, tapi terlalu dekat dengan api juga sengsara karena radiasi panasnya.
Untuk menjauh pun, tetap saja tak bisa terlalu jauh, bagaimana pun juga, kehangatan harus tetap di jaga.......

we don't need a hero

I was just about to do my facilities design when this topic occurs to me....
like usual, I'll do anything to distract me from the actual things that I need to do lol.. but I will still do it anyway in the end, because I have to.
anyway, here we go,

Why do they want to be our hero?
it's not the only thing that will make us value them

even though if it's true,
but becoming our superman doesn't mean literally to be able to fly
or lift a car with a hand
nor that they have to save our life
from a life-death situation
do you know how small the percentage would be
if they want to be able to do that??

to be our hero is enough just to be there
they don't have to solve anything
just being there to listen and support us,
it's all that we need
how long will it take for them to realize this??

we don't need a superman
nor a spiderman
we could go paragliding if we want to fly
mountain climbing if we want to climb high things
what use will we got for laser eyes?

we don't need a hero
we need companions
a person to get through the day
and share the tears and joys


---------

'

Kosong

Apakah kalian pernah merasakan hidup yang hampa?
inilah yang kurasakan sekarang, dan ini bukan untuk yang pertama kalinya.

Aneh kalau untuk dipikir, apakah aku tak punya kerjaan? Salah, malah sebaliknya, aku punya banyak in my to-do-list.
Apakah aku kesepian? Mungkin, tapi jujur, aku punya rumet yang baik, teman kelompok yang selalu bareng,.. tapi...... entah mengapa terkadang aku lebih memilih melewatkan waktu bersama kesendirian dibandingkan dengan mereka. Aku lebih suka sendiri.
Apakah soal cinta? Memang, aku tak punya someone special, tapi aku tau di dunia ini ada orang-orang yang mencintaiku dan aku pun mencintai mereka (baca: keluarga dan teman-teman red.).

Apakah aku melakukan hal-hal yang kusukai? Ya, aku pergi menunggang kuda setiap kali kupunya waktu, dan jujur, kegiatan ini sangat menyenangkan dan mampu membuatku lupa akan segala masalah untuk sesaat. Secercah warna di bingkai hitam-putihku.

Entah apa yang hilang dari hidupku ini? Mungkinkah teman sejati? Secara teman sejatiku saat ini semuanya terletak diseberang gunung dan lautan. Teman-temanku di sini... memang mereka baik.. tapi.. tetap saja tak dapat me-replace mereka ataupun mendekati ikatan persahabatan yang kumiliki dengan teman-teman semasa di kampung halaman dulu. Mungkin saja karena budaya dan back ground yang beda, atau karena bahasa yag tak sama sehingga menjadi penghalang yang sangat besar.

Jujur, mungkin aku merindukan sosok someone special, ya mungkin saja. Tapi jujur juga, di tempatku sekarang berada, tak ada calon yang dapat memasuki hati ini. Kalau dibayangkan untuk bersama dengan salah satu dari mereka... rasanya hidup sendiri jauh lebih baik, hehehe.

Ataukah... aku merindukan kegiatan-kegiatan sosial tanggung jawab yang dulu kumiliki dan tak tersedia kegiatan seperti itu di sini? Tak ada OSIS atau GITA, ataupun english debating club. Di sini tak tersedia kegiatan seperti itu. Memang di sini ada student forum ambassador yang seperti OSIS, tapi... SAF ini hampir tak ada gunanya, mereka tak menyelenggaraka event apa pun, tak juga berfungsi dengan sebagaimana mestinya, menyuarakan suara-suara murid. Badan organisasi ini hanya sekadar nama, karena itulah aku pun malas untuk bergabung.

Hm.... ada banyak kemungkinannya....
tapi tak diketahui yang mana yang jadi alasan sebenarnya...

for a person that I know

I am tired of wondering over and over

Do you remain silent because you are ill?

Do you stop talking because your heart is broken?

Do you look sad because you are sick of me?

Do you hate talking to me?

Do you enjoy the gap between us?

Do you think what I am wondering about you?

Do you feel the same thing as I do?

Lonely

I want to drive the loneliness away

But you never want to let it go

You keep it besides you for every seconds

I want to replace the loneliness

But it seems you love it more than you love me

by: Fen

This poem is made by my friend, I read it, and just perfectly describe what I felt...

Senyum Palsu

dalam hampa
ku bersila

ditemani sepi
disebelah sunyi

mereka berbisik nyaring
suara suara yang asing
dengan nada yang berdenging

mereka ramai
ku tak damai

hati ini kosong
hidup pun melompong

mereka berbisik nyaring
suara suara yang asing
dengan nada yang berdenging

kita tak satu
terpisah pagar batu
senyum yang palsu

mereka menatap
ku meratap

sesalilah
bila ku tak sama
kita bersama
jiwaku berkelana

mereka berbisik nyaring
suara suara yang asing
dengan nada yang berdenging

kumerindu
pada waktu
ingin kupeluk
saat dulu

saat surya
menyapa
dalam ria
kita berkisah

tiada
mereka berbisik nyaring
suara suara yang asing
dengan nada yang berdenging

_._._._._._._._._._._._

temaaaaaannnnnn aku kangeeeeeeennnn >.<

Update

udah lama nih.. ga update...
saatnya update deh hehehehe

Aku yang sekarang udah mulai kuliah lagi, in fact udah mau setengah semester lewat... How is it my third year life? Well, it is exciting, full of reports (just like what my previous predecessors complaint about), busy and above all, I'm enjoying it :)

Kalo mo diliat jumlah reports.. emang banyak banget.. susah?? lumayan.. tapi kalo mau jujur, gw jauh lebih pilih seandainya report" ini individual report daripada group report. hm.. gimana ya... I don't really like group reports... bukannya sombong, tapi aku lebih puas kalo ngerjain sendiri. Semua topik and decision, aku sendiri yang buat, puas tidaknya, aku yang tentuin. Group report gini agak susah, mau buat begini konsultasi dulu, yang lain mikirnya apa aku mikirnya apa. Aku mau begini, mereka ga setuju dan mau begitu, pusing jadinya.. Kadang-kadang kesel juga. Walau teman akrab pun bakal jadi belang kalo sudah begini.

Apa aku masih horse riding?
yup ^^. dan aku enjoy banget horse riding.. at least there's one activity that I could be just myself and far from those reports and projects :)

How about aikido and shinkendo??
:( it's really too bad that I couldn't find a place for me to continue that, nor the time to be honest. The nearest place that I found is in Montreux. Tapi dari sini ke Montreux one way udah mau sejam... Blom lagi biaya transport... hm.... mikir" juga jadinya.

Lalu... apakah ada orang yang berkesan?
Hm... di sekolah ini tetap saja seperti dulu. Ada sih yang berkesan... tapi udah unavailble ato ada trait negative lainnya yang jadi penghalang besar.

oke, times up.. saatnya kembali ke kelas Mr. Greven hehehe :)

Foggy Day

I sit alone
outside my room

see nothing but fog
with my feeling clogged

I live among the clouds
high above the crowds

saying my prays
to cease this sky of grey

for the tears I shed
and the laughter I shared

not to stop dreaming yet
happy ends for romeo and juliette

but it is hard
to chase away doubt

when it's easier to let you leave
rather than to deceive

this love is greed
made my heart bleed

and this cold breeze
made this feeling freeze

should I hold on
or moving on?

Meresah

gara" Dyah nih...
bikin semangat untuk buat puisi hihihihihihi

gundah
resah

tak lagi cerah duniaku
matahariku
berlayar menjauh

ia masih di sana
tapi hangatnya tak terasa

tahukah kamu?
rasa nyeri menunggu
sekiranya bertemu
aku masih ragu

hati ini retak
tapi masih berbunga

apakah anda
merasa sama?
rasa berseri
dan perih?

atau
hanya aku
yang tersipu
dan tertipu?

Game Lovers

we're just a couple of ordinary people
that lives in an unusual world

a real, mixed with imaginary world
we meet each day
we talk each time
we share tears and joy
the bond is born

we know it's not real
and it won't last either

stupid as it might be
as unreal as it is
but we keep going anyway

reasons start to speak
we both realize it
but again
we close our eyes
and start to play

we're just a couple of stupid people
that lost in a game

last day of work

today is my last day of work..
yes it is....

On Tuesday I'll go to Barcelona already!!! ^^
I'm so happy... but.....
..
..
..
..
..
..

I know that I need to pack..
I know that I need to prepare..
but honestly.. I have no interest to pack ( I hate packing ), I tried, but I don't even know where to start!!!!
>.<

I have to pack
I have to pack
I have to pack

I'm going to pack
I'm going to pack
I'm going to pack.... lol

things to do:
PACKING!!!
print tickets out
buy another box for packing
swiss army knife
swarovski
laundry

Counting down

Apakah yang sangat kunanti-nantikan saat ini???

Jawabannya adalah the end of my internship!!!!!!!
^^

not that I don't like my internship, I enjoyed it really. It's just that I want to have my holiday soon!!!! ^^
Mulailah aku meng-count down... 1 month 2 days...

Where I'm going to go?
Barcelona for 2 days, Rome for 3 days, Volterra (just visit), and Florence for 2 days.
^^
These are the places that I haven't been there yet, and now... I'm going to get the experience!
Akhirnya setelah sekian lama ingin pergi ke Vatican, datang juga kesempatan ini.

Tiketku sudah di-booking semua, untuk akomodasi.. hanya tinggal Florence yang harus ditentukan. Train, mungkin bisa kita beli pas harinya.
waaaaa, I'm so excited ^^
Ini akan jadi pengalaman pertama kalinya aku jalan" ke luar negeri dengan teman >.< (well, swiss tidak dihitung ya, berhubung ini sudah menjadi negara tempat tinggalku. hehehe). Dan ini juga akan jadi liburan mandiri terpanjang yang sejauh ini, 1 minggu.
^^

Every sun rise that has come
greet me with a smile every morning
telling me you're nearer to your holiday
by one day
^^

Though I still need to pack all of my things!!
Soalnya kan dengan selesainya internship ini, aku pun juga harus pindah, maka semua barang-barangku yang sudah menggunung ini harus di pack rapi dan disimpan. >.<
Malasnyaaaaaaa......
hehehe

And one more thing, guss what I'm addicted to right now?
something that I never though that I'm going to enjoy it this much!!!!



online game!!!!!!!!
lol
yup, it's pirate of the caribbean online!!
lol
my mom is going to be very angry if she knows though lol....

Love Story

This is my favorite songs right now..
I've been singing these songs since the first time I heard them, just can't get them out of my head lol

the first one is Love Story,
Maybe it's also because of the video that really beautiful that really captures my imagination..
The story of a girl that met her love in a first sight and remember their past life..

It's going to be really wonderful if you could met someone that you'll know just in that second that it's the person you meant to be with....
such a girl imagination lol ^^

Love Story

By: Taylor Swift

We were both young when I first saw you.
I close my eyes and the flashback starts:
I'm standing there on a balcony in summer air.

See the lights, see the party, the ball gowns.
See you make your way through the crowd
and say hello;

Little did I know
That you were Romeo; you were throwing pebbles,
And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet."
And I was crying on the staircase,
begging you, 'Please, don't go.'"

And I said,
"Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone.
I'll be waiting; all there's left to do is run.
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story - baby just say 'Yes.'"

So I sneak out to the garden to see you.
We keep quiet 'cause we're dead if they knew.
So close your eyes; escape this town for a little while.
'Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter,
And my daddy said "Stay away from Juliet,"
But you were everything to me; I was begging you, 'Please, don't go,'"

And I said,
"Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone.
I'll be waiting; all there's left to do is run.
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story - baby just say 'Yes.'

Romeo save me - they're tryin' to tell me how to feel;
This love is difficult, but it's real.
Don't be afraid; we'll make it out of this mess.
It's a love story - baby just say "Yes.'"

Oh.

I got tired of waiting,
Wondering if you were ever comin' around.
My faith in you was fading
When I met you on the outskirts of town,

And I said,
"Romeo save me - I've been feeling so alone.
I keep waiting for you but you never come.
Is this in thy head? I don't know what to think-"

He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring and said,
"Marry me, Juliet - you'll never have to be alone.
I love you and that's all I really know.
I talked to your dad - go pick out a white dress;
It's a love story - baby just say 'Yes.'"

Oh, oh.

We were both young when I first saw you...

The second one is You Belong With Me,
still the same singer, the same type of music

You Belong With Me


You're on the phone with your girlfriend, she's upset
She's going off about something that you said
'Cause she doesn't get your humor like I do

I'm in the room, it's a typical Tuesday night
I'm listening to the kind of music she doesn't like
And she'll never know your story like I do

But she wears short skirts, I wear T-shirts
She's Cheer Captain and I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
That what you're looking for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You belong with me, you belong with me

Walking the streets with you and your worn-out jeans
I can't help thinking this is how it ought to be
Laughing on a park bench, thinking to myself
Hey, isn't this easy?

And you've got a smile that could light up this whole town
I haven't seen it in a while since she brought you down
You say you're fine, I know you better than that
Hey, what ya doing with a girl like that?

She wears high heels, I wear sneakers
She's Cheer Captain and I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
That what you're looking for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You belong with me

Standing by and waiting at your back door
All this time how could you not know?
Baby, you belong with me, you belong with me

Oh, I remember you driving to my house in the middle of the night
I'm the one who makes you laugh when you know you're 'bout to cry
And I know your favorite songs and you tell me 'bout your dreams
Think I know where you belong, think I know it's with me

Can't you see that I'm the one who understands you?
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You belong with me

Standing by and waiting at your back door
All this time, how could you not know?
Baby, you belong with me, you belong with me

You belong with me
Have you ever thought just maybe
You belong with me?
You belong with me

Life goes on...

Hidup itu berjalan seiring dengan waktu, begitu cepat, dan tak terbayangkan.

Oke, saat ini aku sedang berada jauh di negeri orang, menjalani internship sebagai seorang waiter di sebuah restoran Asia. Tinggal di sini sudah bukan sebuah keanehan bagiku. Pergi kesana kemari menggunakan transportasi umum yang nyaman dan aman walau rumit tapi bukan merupakan sebuah masalah lagi. Dengan biasanya aku bisa pergi ke mesin otomatis dengan layar touch-screennya yang dilengkapi dengan bahasa Jerman, Prancis, Itali dan Inggris.

Kesana kemari mendengar orang disekelilingku berbahasa asing, yang juga biasa saja bagiku. Walau aku tak mengerti apa pun yang mereka ocehkan dalam bahasa Jerman, atau pun saat mereka mencoba berkomunikasi dengan bahasa Inggris mereka yang pas-pasan, aku tak masalah.

Aku pun baru sadar.....
5 tahun yang lalu.. saat aku baru mulai masuk SMA, tak terpikir sedikit pun aku akan tinggal di negara yang saat ini resmi menjadi tempatku berdomisili. Bahasa Perancis, Jerman dan Itali sama sekali tak kumengerti. Tinggal dan hidup di sini, sama sekali tak kusangka. Kalau aku dulu ditanya mungkin jawabanku akan 'ga mungkin'.

Tiba-tiba saja saat aku kelas 3 SMA, setelah perdebatan panjang yang ga kelar-kelar soal jurusan kuliah dengan orang tua, yang jurusannya diubah entah berapa kali, mulai dari computer engineering, aviation, interior design, psychology, medecine, hospitality, culinary, chinese, event management, sampai akhirnya Hospitality and Event Management. Yang letak kuliahnya mulai dari kampung halamanku, Palembang, Sydney, Melbourne, USA, London, dan akhirnya nyasar ke Switzerland. Biasa, mau daku sebagai anak, ga selalu sama dengan harapan dan kemauan orang tua terutama nyokap. Setelah proses negosiasi dan gonta-ganti jurusan yang memakan waktu berbulan-bulan, sampailah pada sebuah kesepakatan gabungan antara kemauan si anak dan sang ibu, Hospitality and Event Management. (hospitality dari sang ibu, event management dari si anak)

Awalnya, apakah ada rencana ke sini? TIDAK SAMA SEKALI.
Dan tiba-tiba saja, formulir pendaftaran diisi dan dikirim, uang kuliah pun ditransfer, dan akhirnya aku pun berangkat ke negeri keju ini. Ke negeri orang yang begitu jauh, tanpa teman atau kenalan, dengan pergaulan yang aku masih tidak tau secara jelas, banyak yang bilang aku berani dan hebat, tapi kalau menurutku, aku cuma NEKAT.

Tidak mau kuliah di negeri sendiri yang mutunya dipertanyakan. Tidak mau juga tinggal bersama orang tua yang membuat diriku terkekang, aku ingin belajar mandiri. Ingin rasanya mencicipi bagaimana rasanya tinggal di negara maju yang kalau melanggar peraturan memang beresiko berat kena hukuman berat, tidak seperti di kampung halaman yang asal menyogok pihak berwajib, semuanya beres, atau yang hukuman pidana pemerkosa dan pembuhuh hanya beberapa bulan penjara, lebih ringan daripada hukuman orang maling ayam.

Kita hanya menjalani hidup ini seperti mengikuti aliran air, kadang tenang, kadang bergejolak dengan arusnya yang deras, kadang melewati sungai yang luas, kadang masuk ke sungai kecil. Kita tidak tahu akan sampai di mana, atau akan bagaimana.

Dulu, tinggal di sini rasanya tidak mungkin, negara tujuanku dulu itu antara USA, Singapore atau Australia. Aku sekarang di mana?
Dulu, kerja sebagai waiter restoran??? Ga mungkin kali ya... Tapi sekarang, pekerjaanku apa?
Dulu, horse riding itu hanya khayalan belaka. Sekarang?
Dulu, belajar bela diri itu juga hanya seperti film dan komik. Tapi aku baru aja pulang dari tempat latihan Aikido-ku.
Dulu, sekolah perhotelan? Wah, ga tertarik tuh....
Dulu...
Dulu..
Dulu.
Dulu

Life goes on..
you'll never know where you're going to be
what you're going to be
just suddenly, you are what you are
could be positive or negative
could be someone you wanted to be, or the contrary
but you know what?
life goes on

Pandora Box

I saw a box
shining brightly
full of colors

so attractive
that my heart start to yearn for it

what box is it?
I do not know
will it be opened for me?
that's a mystery

whose box is it?
it's a secret
how could I obtain it?
I have no idea

what's inside..
puzzles me
will it be nice?
will it be bad?

will it be full?
will it be empty?

in the midst of know nothingness
I still years for it
dreaming of having it in my arms
..

such a box
a pandora box

secercah warna dalam bingkai hitam putih

kemarin...
hari pertama aku diperbolehkan bergabung dengan yang lain di tempet Aikido ^^.
Maklum, berhubung aku pemula dan baru mulai, selama ini aku belajar sendirian dengan personal mentor, dan baru kemarinlah aku mulai belajar dengan yang lain. Yang artinya juga aku telah lulus setidaknya pelajaran dasar. hehehe

Senang?
pastinya
Gugup?
sebelumnya iya juga, takut kalo ternyata aku gagal dan kembali diungsikan sendiri. hahaha

Kemarin, sparing partner-ku seorang cewek yang sudah belajar aikido 3 atau 4 tahun.. dia sudah pakai hakama, yang artinya sudah lumayan master, dan satu hal lagi... dia cantik banget.

Capek?
wah... sangat.. apalagi sekarang swiss sudah memasuki musim panas, gila, panasnya sudah tidak kalah dengan Indonesia, malah mataharinya lebih menyengat rasanya.

Setelah latihan yang melelahkan ditambah dengan suhu yang kian meninggi, apalah yang bisa mengalahkan kenikmatan 'shower'... Enak banget rasanya waktu mandi!!!! XD

Saat berjalan pulang, sekitar 500-600 meter yang harus ditempuh demi mencapai halte, ada seekor anjing besar yang tiba-tiba menggonggong dan lari dengan kencang ke arah kita. Aku terdiam, aku memang jatuh cinta dengan binatang spesies satu ini, tapi tetap saja, saat mereka menyalak dan berlari kearahku.............. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. Aku takut! Aku tak berani bergerak, takut bila aku salah bergerak, dan menyebabkan akibat yang buruk. Apalagi saat itu aku berjalan dibagian depan rombongan. Seakan anjing itu berlari dan siap menyerangku. Untung saja pemiliknya yang berada di belakang anjing itu berteriak, memanggil namanya, si anjing pun diam dan berhenti.
Barulah kusadari, ada seseorang yang telah maju dari belakang dan berdiri di depanku. Aku baru sadar, aku terlindungi.
Sebuah perasaan yang timbul dengan tiba-tiba, dan membuatku kaget. Ini pertama kalinya setelah sekian lama aku merasa terlindungi. Kapan ya terakhir kali aku merasa dilindungi???? 3 tahun atau 4 tahun yang lalu??

Selama ini rasanya aku memang ingin mandiri, tidak mau bertumpu pada orang lain, dan aku merasa mampu. Apakah aku mampu sekarang? Aku harap sih iya.
Mau mandiri atau mau dilindungi???
Mandiri dong, tapi kalau dilindungi juga.. sekali-sekali ga apa-apa kok, asal jangan terus-terusan atau jadi ketergantungan. hehehehehe

lucu juga ya.. dari digonggongin anjing jadi refleksi diri XD

ini lagi iseng, mencoba membuat sesuatu yang sesuai dengan KBBI
entah maksud hati ini tercapai atau tidak... (walau tampaknya saya telah menyalahi aturan berbahasa Indonesia yang baik dan benar dalam beberapa kalimat yang telah saya sadari, tapi untuk mengubah menjadi benar... terasa janggal dan tak nyaman... Akhirnya dibiarkan sajalah hehehehehe)

just thoughts

Begitu lama saya berhenti meng-update, sampai bingung harus mulai dari mana.....

yang sebenarnya ingin saya teriakkan......

I'M GOING ON A HOLIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!
yay!!!!!!!
^^

well... er... it's still on July though...
but who cares? just for the thought of it, excites me!
I'm going to Barcelona, Rome, and.. maybe Florence!!!!!
3 cities that I want to visit since a long time ago, and here's my chance! ^^

Am I going alone this time?
... almost (sigh....) >.<
luckily my friend Nickie is coming from UK to join me!!! ^^
We haven't met more than a year now. and now we're going on a holiday together... is such an awesome thing ^^
can't wait to finalize everything and then just wait for the happy days to come...

After a week around Europe holiday with Nickie, I'm planning to go back to Zug for a day or 2, just to organize my things for the last time before my flight to Atlanta.
Yup, I'm going to visit my sister again, and this time to take her daughter that is going to be born this July into my caring. ^^

Can't wait for the holiday
Can't wait to see my new, soon to be born, niece
and of course, last... but the best of all, my last day of work!!!!!!!!!!
(not that I don't like my job, but... well.... it's just... a happy thought.. hehehehe)


But... I still need to buy a handbag (quite big to suit my all-purposes in travelling) and a jeans (since my current jeans have holes now, HOLES!!! how could it be? I have NO-IDEA seriously >.<)

and... er... I think I need a bit diet.... coz I'm going to see my mom soon.... Yeah... I do need to reduce 2 or 3... or.. maybe 5 kg... >.<
but I think 2 or 3 is enough lol
I can't refused my ultimate joy in eating ^^

ia sudah tiada

ia yang kau kenal
sudah tiada
ia yang kau cinta
tak lagi di sini
ia yang kau impikan
telah hilang

ia telah berubah
bukan seorang yang kau kenal
ia tak lagi seperti dulu

kau hanya mengejar bayangan
kau mengejar dia
yang telah tiada

ia tak lagi disini
ia telah pergi
bukan sembunyi

kau tunjukkan sayang
pada orang yang salah
orang yang berbeda
dia bukan ia

ia sudah tiada
ia tak lagi di sini
ia telah hilang

ia yang kau kenal
telah berubah
ia yang sekarang
tak lagi kau kenal

few words

well....
what can I say......
I want to write longer >.<
I really want to >.<
but now... I only have half an hour before I have to catch the bus and here I am, still haven't got out of my cozy bed yet.
hehehehe

even when I have spare time.....
I spent if for "Legend" the Korean drama series, hehehe
the story is good, the legend is... somehow... sad :(
and honestly, I hate sad ending stories, so I hope the drama will have a happy ending (I'm watching episode 8 out of 24).

and oh.....
I got my final 2nd ROA already!!!!
my average is 86 :(
T.T
I hate accounting report
and the group member of the other report is.. er... not so... fortunate >.<
(sigh.............)
what can I do..
it's life.. so.. ENJOY it!!!!!!!!!
^^

This year Valentine's day is quite ordinary for me.
I hope for nothing
since I'm going to work the whole day anyway
hahaha
strangely, I got a strange dream, that made me wrote this poet on the morn of the "V" day

I have no hope with you
I thought
I’ve given up on you
I thought
I’ve been over you
I thought

Saat kubuka mata
Di senja tadi
Aku terhenyak
Dalam mimpi
Engkau ada

There’s a breakfast in front of the door
With a little note,
Make sure that I have breakfast before I go to work
(something that I’ve really rarely done)
there’s a message on my cell
shy, awkward words

semua itu
ciptaan khayalan saat tidur
menyingkap keinginan hati
yang terkubur

something impossible
things that will not happen in reality

harapan kosong
belaka

Today
Just like yesterday
I’m not hoping for anyone

Well, the valentine's day is quite good actually.
I got the whole atmosphere since I'm working in a restaurant and you can guess our customers would be couples, and even we gave some special extra decoration and services. One of my college, he's a player I could tell, he gave every single working woman in the restaurant a rose, so I got a rose. Well, I dried it for sure, like I did with every rose that came to my possession lol, but the best part is....... I got a lot of tips!!!! lol
I love Valentine's day ^^

so many things in my mind... so little time

after I've been isolated in the online world (my internet is not working at all!! well, except from my cell phone), so many things have run through my mind...
so many things that I want to write, but I couldn't
I don't have the media
I don't have the time (working 10-12 hours a day is exhausting)
sometimes I have them so solid in my mind but I'm too lazy to write them down
hehehe
my old disease..
yeah... I know

starting from the..
Valentine
human instinct
working
power of mind
and the last.... from today....
the truth or lies of history and governments (I've just finished reading an analysis of an NTU student that is rumored to try to kill his prof. and did suicide, well, it's just an analysis from 1 point of view, the truth is something that no one knows since the subject of the story is no longer live in this world)
well, the subject is not about this person, but I got an idea to write about another subject that is inspired by this, about the lies in the histories that we learned.
well, the history from every country is different, well, just take the easy one, the winner is always the the good side.
for example, if and only if, NAZI never lost, maybe the history that we learn today, that Hitler is a good man, well, of course all of the killings will be covered anyway, and no one knows about it, or maybe just keep silent and no one is going to talk about it. Or even if we know that he was an evil man which kills a lot of people, we still got some good points about him. If and only if, he won.
and it's also depends on which country you are.. the same event will have different stories depends on which side did you learn about it.

anyway, I'm not going to discuss this longer, I got to go to Zurich, and I need to catch my bus to catch my train.
hehehehe

my second internship

I'm in Zug now...
right... for my second internship.

I've been working for a week now.
is it good?
well.... I could say..... it's okay... even... I might be luckier than my friends that are also work for the same company. My working place is the furthest, I need to take bus to go there, but.. the people that I'm working with is quite good, my restaurant is not as busy as theirs, and of course, I got better tips. Though when I just arrived home they all already ready to go to bed. hehehe

Well, the people that I'm working with are quite good, so I'm quite content with them. though of course, not all... hehehe. and honestly, I prefer that my supervisor would like to teach me more about everything. She haven't really teach me about anything, and she's troubled and complaining that I don't know enough or I worked so slow.. of course I can't work fast and I need to ask her for almost every little thing since I don't know anything!! But other than that... she's nice, and I like her too ^^

The chefs are good too. Even one of them teach me a bit German and Thai from the menu. hehehe. Only one that is quite annoying.. He's so .... bossy and complaining quite a lot.. Luckily he's not there everyday hehehe...

There's another restaurant that I need to work too, but only for lunch time and only for temporary. It's also a good Thai restaurant, though much busier than Imperial. It's really nice to work here, my Indonesian friend also works here and even the supervisor is also an Indonesian and he's really nice too. It's like working for fun there ^^
Too bad that I'm just going to work there temporarily.

My room.... honestly not really good, but... since I already been warned that it's really bad... It's still much better than what I was imagining, so.. It's still very good lol. I got quite a big room and it's only for 2 of us, me and my friend. Though.. of course.. the bed is a cheap one, including with the bed sheets and all.. My blanket has several holes on it, the heater is not working properly... Luckily we got another small heater, that save our lives during the cold winter nights... hehe. And even now.. my mind already running around how to make my room more cozy... lol

When we already bought new bed sheets, my roommate is going to move the bed into the corner, than we're going to have more space... I'm going to ask for the blanket from my Indo supervisor, he told me that he have more if we need, and I'm going to put my holes blanket as a carpet so we can sit on the floor.. I might also buy some pillows hehehe. We're going to buy a small fridge to put our food supplies there, including milk, yoghurt, and... ice cream ^^.

I just hope that summer will come soon. Since Zug is a beautiful city near the lake anyway.. I tried to walk along the lake last week.. but.. it seems that winter winds is trying to put me back to my chamber. hahahahahahahaha

my last day at School

This is the end of my short vacation, actually it already ended since yesterday.... since I was packing the whole day.....

I can't imagine I have so many stuff!!!!!

and incredibly... I managed to pack everything!!!! though... moving is another big challenge! lol

I put 1 box at school, that's the only box that we could put at school. I have 1 luggage and 2 boxes that I'll send through post to my new city, and I'll leave 1 bag in Leysin with my roommate that I'll take later and... I'll carry 1 back pack and 1 small bag to my new place tonight.

What am I doing now?

waiting for the train station to reopen after lunch break to send my 3 valuable items, then... I'll be officially ready to go. In the same time, I also enjoyed the unlimited though slow internet that I have now. Cause I might need to survive a week or more without internet lol.

Prepared to be a bit isolated in the new place for a moment before I could gain the connection again. ^^

I've done packing, now just waiting for the time to go....

I'm wondering about the new life that I'll have

about the new place that I'll live

the new place that I'll work

the people that I'll work and live with.........

It's like going somewhere that I don't know...

and I'm just depending on hopes.......

I hope everything is going to be ok

I hope everything will run well

^^

My short holiday

Akhiranyaaa..........

Setelah melalui hari-hari penuh penderitaan belajar, liburan ini datang juga... Yah.. walaupun cuma libur dalam arti beberapa hari yang kurang dari seminggu. Ulangan terakhir hari Selasa, Hari Senin, sudah mulai kerja... Maka... libur yang sudah pendek ini masih dipersingkat dengan kebutuhan ngepack dan pindahan.

Tapi.. yang namanya liburan, harus full liburan dong. hehehehe. Sejak hari Selasa kemarin sudah kuhabiskan waktuku dengan membaca komik, lalu kemarin pun aku sudah pergi berkuda untuk mungkin yang terakhir kalinya dalam tempo waktu yang agak panjang. Soalnya di Zug nanti, blom tentu ada tempat berkuda yang terjangkau dalam arti waktu, area, bahasa, dan juga biaya. hehehe. Lalu malamnya, kami mengadakan pesta selesai ujian kecil-kecilan.

Hari ini???? Aqua Park!!!! ^^ Mari kita bermain air. hehehehe. Ini akan jadi hari pertama bagi diriku bermain di Aqua Park. Aku emang males sih berenang... tapi klo main air, kayaknya asyik juga, lagian di sekitar sini tidak banyak tempat bermain yang bisa untuk jadi tempat pelampiasan. hehehe.

Semoga saja semuanya berjalan lancar....

Aku akan baru mulai ngepack.... em... mungkin nanti malam. Perginya.... hari Minggu barengan sama anak-anak yang lain. ^^

Liburan memang singkat, kurang dari seminggu... kurang rasanya

T.T

the end is yet to come....

My exams are almost over......

^^

Setelah penderitaan yang dimulai dari hari Senin.... akhirnya telah sampailah saya pada hari Sabtu, dimana hanya tinggal event presentation pada hari Senin dan Marketing Exam pada hari Selasa. hehehe.

Kembali kepada kebiasaanku.. di saat aku seharusnya membaca buku Marketing, kuputuskan untuk menulis blog. hehe

Ujianku..... dimulai dari biscom yang benar" mengarang bebas seindah-indahnya, dilanjutkan dengan french 3 yang listeningnya super cepet seakan-akan si direktur dari Guide Michelin itu bakal mati klo tidak menyelesaikan semua yang ingin dia katakan dalam tempo waktu sesingkat-singkatnya........ yang membuat semua pengerja exam menghela napas sedalam-dalamnya saat recording itu selesai. Mau bagaimana lagi? kita harus menjawab pertanyaan-pertanyaan based on the recording yang cepatnya bagai dikejar setan itu dan only from this recording, nilainya 25 point out of 100!!!!!!!!

Gila... aku jawabnya cuma berdasarkan common sense dan pengetahuan dari bacaan tentang gudie michelin waktu kelas terakhir french.... I hope that it helps hehehe

Then introduction to tourism... I like the subject, I like the teacher, for sure I can do it well. hehehe. I even studied the dark age out of curiosity.. and found more about the vampire's legends!!!! Nice reading.... ^^ hahahahahaha

Then the housekeeping management.... er... not so good.. but... hei!!!!! it's over!!!!! I don't even need to open those books anymore!!!! hehehehe

Adios, Au revoir, ^^

The accounting report is done too!!!! well, I think it might not be really good.. but I don't care anymore! it's so confusing..... >.<

Just really glad that we've finished it! hehehehe

Yesterday.. I decided to be my holiday... I went to Aigle with my roommate for lunch, it's in a Thai Restaurant, we really felt as if we're back to Asia... such a nice feeling. ^^ then we went to Vevey. I found a scarf that I was looking in Esprit for in a cheap price ^^.

Well, I only got 2 more things to do now... and I only concerned about marketing.. because of the essays questions.... that each worth 40 points..... I can't fail to answer any!!! since if I failed, for sure I'm going to fail the course, cause the passing grade is 70.........

*sigh.. *

Wish me luck!!!!

^^

Not in a mood for exam

>.<

>.<

Tomorrow is the first day of the final exams.....

but still.... I'm in my playful mood, I haven't even read anything today...

until now!!!!! and it's night already.......

er...

maybe because tomorrow is business communication anyway, there's nothing to study.

or... even though there's something to study, something to read... I'll finish it in... 2 hours at the most. For sure. Because... I knew this.. then... I'm not trying to study now....

hehehehehehe

but still... I don't feel like the exams are in front of my face, no!!

It felts like a usual week, without any exam or homework, a week where I could just lazying around.....

though of course... it's not as easy as it seems to be...

ok, here's my schedule

Monday       : Business Communication Exam           2 PM

Tuesday       : French 3 Exam                                        4 PM

Wednesday :  Introduction to Tourism Exam          10 AM

Thursday     : Housekeeping Management Exam      8 AM

Friday          : Accounting Report                                 3 PM

Monday       : Introduction to Events Presentation  8 AM

Tuesday       : Marketing Exam                                     8 AM

Not as full as my first year's schedule though, this year's is more relax and not that cramped together.

So... it is quite good actually.

After all of these exams.... it's time for me to have fun, it's time for me to start packing!!!!!

Since I'll move to Zug, I guess maybe on the 24th, since I'll start working on 26th. So I'll have one day to unpack and familiarize with the environment. Plus, to subscribe with the internet provider, I really need internet to give some colors in my internship live. Since I'll have nothing to do when I'm not working, I need the internet to watch movies, chat with my friends, call my parents and friends, read news, and of course... blogging.

hehehehehehehehehehe

...............

what should I do so I could have a better mood for exam?

so I could study better?

what should I do?????

what could I do???

so I could stay focus with my reviews??

Pelarian dari tugas

Penyakitku kumat lagi....
Disaat aku seharusnya mengerjakan sesuatu yang seharusnya kukerjakan... aku melarikan diri dengan cara mencari hal lain untuk dikerjakan. Contohnya??? Blogging hahahahaha.

Aku baru saja dari internship office, sign contract buat internshipku yang ke2. Jadi waiter di Imperial Thai di Zug, Switzerland. Aku sudah liat foto-fotnya di internet, keren sih, kayaknya aku bisa lumayan betah kerja di sana, mulai dari 28 Januari sampai dengan 27 Juli. Gajinya? Lumayaaannnn... gaji kotor 2200 CHF, bersihnya 1287.55 CHF plus tips..... hehehe. Denger-denger nih.... tips lumayan.. bisa mencapai 500-700 CHF sebulan. Wow...... asyik nih. hehehe. Aku memang sedang gencar-gencarnya menghitung tentang uang, maklum, CHF lagi tinggi banget dibandingkan rupiah, apalagi sekarang di Indo keadaan ekonominya sedang tidak baik. Timbullah keinginan untuk meringankan beban orang tua, apalagi mulai semester depan uang sekolahku juga ikut naik. Maunya sih, beda kenaikan nanti aku yang tanggung. Semoga saja semuanya berjalan lancar dan aku sanggup untuk menjalankan rencanaku ini. ^^

Seharusnya apa yang aku lakukan sekarang??
Menyelesaikan event presentation. Sudah hampir selesai sih, cuma tinggal menambahkan foto dan animasi. hehe

Tapi mood ini jujur... bukanlah mood untuk belajar atau sekolah... Aku sedang berada di alam mimpi.. Masih terngiang-ngiang di benakku tentang film yang kutonton dari minggu lalu. Hong Gil Dong, lalu sekarang.. Beethoven Virus. Film ini benar-benar menggelitik jiwa seniku. Aku memang tidak berbakat ataupun mahir dalam musik, tapi aku benar-benar menikmati musik. Aku suka main piano walau aku tau, aku mainnya ga pernah bagus-bagus amat. Mulai dari teknik yang pas-pasan, jarang latihan, kurang penghayatan, sampai kurangnya pengetahuan tentang istilah-istilah musik yang didominasi bahasa Itali. Tapi aku memang main hanya untuk hobi, hanya untuk senang-senang, asal aku senang... itu saja sudah cukup. ^^
Yang mengesalkan... saat aku sedang ingin main piano.. piano itu jauh dari jangakauan. Piano di Grand Hall suaranya amatlah sangat menyedihkan, piano yang di Gereja... males untuk jalan keluar disaat winter. Apalagi sekarang lagi kepengen belajar main biola.. Keinginan ini sudah dari lama sih, tapi selalu tidak pernah tercapai. Dulu waktu membentuk "Pachabels Blue", duet piano dan biola.. aku sempat ketemu guru biolanya dan sempat mau belajar. Sayang saat itu sudah mau ulangan umum, dan tertundalah lagi, lalu sesudahnya, tibalah saya di kelas XII, final year in high school, dan hilanglah lagi kesempatan.

Apa boleh buat.....
mungkin suatu hari nanti,

Jujur, aku awalnya nonton film Beethoven Virus ini gara-gara pemainnya Jang Geun Suk, si pemeran Prince Lee Chang Hwi di Hong Gil Dong. Tapi peran yang ia mainkan di film ini beda jauh dari sisi karakter dan penampilan. Aku ga ngeh waktu liat penampilannya yang modern di film ini, apalagi karakternya di sini sungguh ceria, tidak seperti peran mellow si pangeran. Tapi setelah kutonton sampai episode 7, ceritanya juga tidak kalah menarik, apalagi lagu-lagu klasik yang terus menjadi tema. Lumayan, menambah pengetahuan tentang lagu klasik dan para komposer terkenalnya. Aku pun kembali tertantang untuk mengetes memory isitlah-istilah classical pieces yang kupelajari waktu SD dulu. Sungguh menarik.. tampaknya aku selalu haus akan ilmu....

Pengetahuan di dunia ini.. begitu banyak dan begitu menarik...
Aku ingin tau
Aku penasaran
Aku ingin belajar
Aku ingin bisa
Tapi...........
Tampaknya walaupun kubelajar seumur hidup.. rasa haus ini tidak akan pernah terpuaskan.

Hong Gil Dong songs

I got the full album for Hong Gil Dong ^^
at last......
after downloading for hours and hours..... hehehehehehehehehe

2 of my favorite songs are actually... er... sad songs.
But even the story is so sad in the end, that the impression that lasts is so sad that it even still hurt my heart when I remembered or hear the songs...

This is 'what if' by Tae Yeon from Girls Generation

manyageh naega gandamyeon
naega dagagandamyeon
neon eoddeogeh saenggakhalgga
yonginaelsu eobtgo

manyageh niga gandamyeon
niga ddeonagandamyeon
neol eoddeogeh bonaeyahalji
jaggoo geobi naneun geol

naega babo gataseo
barabolsu bakkeman eobtneungeon amado
wemyeon haljidomoreul ni maeumgwa
ddo keuraeseo deo mareojil saiga dwelggabwa

jeongmal babo gataseo
saranghanda haji mothaneungeon amado
mannam dwiyeh gidarineun apeumeh
seulpeun nanaldeuri dooryeowoseo ingabwa

manyageh niga ondamyeon
niga dagaondamyeon
nan eoddeogeh haeyamanhalji
jeongmal alsu eobtneungeol

naega babo gataseo
barabolsu bakkeman eobtneungeon amado
wemyeon haljidomoreul ni maeumgwa
ddo keuraeseo deo mareojil saiga dwelggabwa

jeongmal babo gataseo
saranghanda haji mothaneungeon amado
mannam dwiyeh gidarineun apeumeh
seulpeun nanaldeuri dooryeowoseo ingabwa

naega babo gataseo
saranghanda haji mothaneungeon amado
mannam dwiyeh gidarineun apeumeh
seulpeun nanaldeuri dooryeowoseo ingabwa

If i were to go
If i were to get close to you
What would you think?
I don’t have the courage.

If you were to go,
If you were to leave.
I don’t know how to send you away
It keeps hanging on my mind

I know i am a fool and can only watch you from afar
Your heart may look away from me…
And so we could even become strangers

Just like a fool i can’t even say that i love you because …
We’re afraid the wait that comes upon us
After we meet will be painful and sad.

If you were to come
To come near me.
What would i do ?
I really don’t know

Because im like a fool.
Even though i know looking is all i can do
Your heart may look away from me
And so we could even become strangers

Just like a fool i can’t even say that i love you because….
We’re afraid the wait that comes upon us
After we meet will be painful and sad

Because i’m like a fool
Even though i can’t say i love you
We’re afraid the wait that comes upon us
After we meet will be painful and sad.

만약에 내가 간다면 내가 다가간다면
넌 어떻게 생각할까 용기 낼 수 없고

만약에 니가 간다면 니가 떠나간다면
널 어떻게 보내야할지 자꾸 겁이 나는걸

내가 바보같아서 바라볼 수 밖에만 없는건 아마도
외면 할지도 모를 니 마음과 또 그래서 더 멀어질 사이가 될까봐

정말 바보같아서 사랑한다하지 못하는건 아마도
만남뒤에 기다리는 아픔에 슬픈 나날들이 두려워서인가봐

만약에 니가 온다면 니가 다가온다면
난 어떻게 해야만 할지 정말 알수 없는걸

내가 바보같아서 바라볼 수 밖에만 없는건 아마도
외면 할지도 모를 니 마음과 또 그래서 더 멀어질 사이가 될까봐

정말 바보같아서 사랑한다하지 못하는건 아마도
만남 뒤에 기다리는 아픔에 슬픈 나날들이 두려워서인가봐

내가 바보같아서 사랑한다하지 못하는건 아마도
만남 뒤에 기다리는 아픔에 슬픈 나날들이 두려워서인가봐

the other one is 'fate' by Park Wan Kyu

naega neomu yaghaeseo naega neomu nabbaseo
Geujeo ireohge neol bogoman issseo
Nae jichin maeumdo nae gipeun sangcheodo
oraen gieogcheoreom ijeoseottnabwa..
nareul gamdang hal suga eobseo~
neoegeman maedallige dwe

neo ireohge gajima~~
nae simjangi neoreul bureujanha~
michidorog janinhan inyeone
deoisang amugeotdeo hal suga oebseo

seulpeunnae moseubdo seulpeunneoe nunbitdo
geujyeo seuchyeoganeun baramiryeona
gachin baramsorie gwi0reul magabojiman
neoreul boneun nuneun mageul su eobseo..
gateun haneurarae neowa nan
daeungoseul bogo ittnabwa..

neo ireohge gajima~~
nae simjangi neoreul bureujanha~
michidorog janinhan inyeone
deoisang amugeotdeo hal suga oebseo

ggeutieobtneun maeume~~
beorilsuga eobtneun i yogsimi
na ireohge wonhago wonhaedo
neol jagyeogjocha eobtneun naingeol..

geureol jagyeogjocha~~ eobtneun naingeol..

내가 너무 약해서 내가 너무 나빠서
그저 이렇게 널 보고만 있어
나의 지친 마음도 나의 깊은 상처도
오랜 기억처럼 잊어었나봐..

나를 감당 할 수가 없어~
너에게만 매달리게 되

너 이렇게 가지마~~
내 심장이 너를 부르잖아~
미치도록 잔인한 인연에
더이상 아무것도 할 수가 없어..

슬픈나의 모습도 슬픈너의 눈빛도
그져 스쳐가는 바람이려나
거친 바람소리에 귀를 막아보지만
너를 보는 눈은 막을 수 없어..

같은 하늘아래 너와 난
다른곳을 보고 있나봐..

너 이렇게 가지마~~
내 심장이 너를 부르잖아~
미치도록 잔인한 인연에
더이상 아무것도 할 수가 없어..

끝이없는 마음에~~
버릴수가 없는 이 욕심이
나 이렇게 원하고 원해도
널 자격조차 없는 나인걸..

그럴 자격조차~~없는 나인걸..

—-

Because I am so weak, because I am so bad
I am just watching you like this.
My worn-out mind and my deep scar
I must have forgotten them like an old memory.
I cannot handle myself,
I end up clinging on to you.

Don’t leave like this
(Don’t you see) My heart is calling out to you.
In this cruel fate, that drives me crazy,
There is nothing more I can do.

My sad appearance and the sad look in your eyes –
I wonder if they are just a passing wind.
Although I try to block my ears from the rough sound of the wind
I cannot block my eyes from seeing you.
You and I under the same sky
We must be looking towards different places.

Don’t leave like this
(Don’t you see) My heart is calling out to you.
In this cruel fate, that drives me crazy,
There is nothing more I can do.

In an endless feeling, this greed I can’t abandon
Although, like this, I want and want
It is I that has no right to have you.
It is I that has no right to have you.

Sorry....

dedicated to someone that used to be 'my someone'

I'm sorry to tell you this
I know I'm selfish
But I really need to tell you this
for this is my answer...

I'm sorry if you still felt the same way as before
sorry if you are still waiting for me
impatiently
sorry for all the pain that you have to endure

but honestly
I don't think we could be the same as we used to be
not only that both of us knew that it has no future
but I have lost the precious feeling that we had.
to force it,
will have nothing in result
only to add new scar for both of us

you were sorry to push me around
but still, you pushed me again and again

I'm very sorry to tell you this,
but I don't want to start new
both of us knew it will lead to nothing

I'm sorry that I don't even want to try
for I know, the feeling will never come back

the future that I've planned
has no place for you
I know it's cruel to say
but if I don't tell you clearly,
you'll start to push me again

sorry that I'm very evil to tell you this,
But I'm waiting for someone else
not you

but you ask for the truth,
and the truth that I gave.

This is the thing that I've been telling you for times
again and again
it's over.

Please forget me,
please start a new with someone
someone that will cherish you better than me
someone that you will love more than me

Please move on
don't stay where you are right now

I'm sorry...................

movie Hong Gil Dong

I just finished a Korean Drama, Hong Gil Dong, this morning.

It means... yes... I spent my new year watching this Korean series. hehehehe Well, I did have a small party with my friends, open a bottle of wine, took some pictures, then... I went back to my fantasy world.

This morning, my mind run back to the movie, to the story....
My feeling is still the same as this morning.. my heart is crying, how could there be a sad story such as this? This is a story, and like other stories, I hope that this one will end happily, I've been thinking about what kind of happy ending the story will have, but it turns out to be not that happy. It made me shed tears...

In this story, the character that caught my attention is the legitimate prince. He is the son of the previous queen, and the second prince of the nation. After his father death, he received a royal sword from his father with the inscription that will make him the next king. But then, his older brother, the first prince set fire in his palace, killing his mother, and made him run away setting a fake death of him behind. He has been a dead person in the eye of the world.

20 years later, he has gathered a lot of money and power secretly with the mask of a merchant. He grew to be a cold man that only has one goal, to fulfill his destiny and become king. Accidentally, he met a dimwitted, reckless girl that eventually could open his heart and made him more human, he learned what is it mean to cherish and to protect something. With the hero of the story, he found the reason why he should be king, to protect his people, give them better live.

The present king, his older brother, has become insane. He has a deep guilty feeling inside, that he had kill his own brother in order to ascend the throne, he keeps having delusion of ghosts that came to blame him. He became a crazy king that never care about his people, and so the the people are suffering.

After he succeeded to ascend the throne, his older brother told him a secret that just has been revealed, the royal sword with the inscription on it is fake, the real one, doesn't have anything written on it. The one who fake the sword is his own mother, he never was the real king. All that he had been believed was a lie, he lost his trust, his reason.

Though eventually, he gain back his reason to become king, to cherish and protect his people, he faced a new challenge, the hero, hong gil dong is a bastard, therefore, a slave, a criminal, but he was his loyal friend, a hero for the people. He tried to give him official title, but the nobles and other government officials keep complaining. Then, a rumor of the hope of the people to make the hero become King, the law stated him as traitor, and has to be executed. In order to become a real king that could control his ministers and scholars, he should kill gil dong. His fiancee, the reckless girl that opened his heart, has been in love with gil dong for a long time and decided to go to Gil Dong's side. Knowing to take her by force will only kill her innerself, but to let her go, means that she would be killed too, and that will kill his innerself.

In the end, he let her go...
Having silenced all of the complaints from the ministers, he ruled as the greatest king in the history.

Such a sad story, a sad ending for him, and also for the hero of the movie...


If I was in his position...
knowing that everything that I believed was a lie... honestly, I wouldn't know what to do, I would be too confuse to do anything, I might run away, I might be pretending that I never know the truth..
Though I hope for a happy ending...
Logically, it won't be easy to change something that already like blood to the society at that time, the different of royalties and slaves. Although he is the king, the king alone couldn't change anything. He need support from his ministers, his subordinates, his people. This kind of plot, is something that most likely to happen in the real world.
Sad.. isn't it... the world that we lives in... is not a world of a happy ending.

There's a song that also very sad... just hearing it could make me sad, though I don't know the meaning of the words, but then I found out the meaning of the words. It is a sad song.