Yesterday... I received news.. that my uncle had just died.
I'm speechless... I don't know what to say...
I am sad
But it's not something that's shocking.. we (the family) had been warn.. by the words of brain tumor.... by the words of the doctors that said "sorry, but I do not dare".
In some corner of my heart... I think somehow.. it might have been better for him. He's no longer haunted by 'when would it be' or that he won't be in pain any longer. He is free from any worries and troubles.
Yes.. this must has been something good for him.
Now that has left...
How I longed to go to my family.. to my mother that's grieving her younger brother...
to my younger cousins that just lost their father.
But then again... I don't know how to console them...
Perhaps.. I would just sit in silence with them.
I feel remorse too that I had never visited him when he was sick. But living outside of the country.. it's not that easy to return either.
But then again.. I think I do have the benefit.. the uncle that engraved in my mind is a healthy laughing uncle. The last time I was in the country, he didn't have the tumor yet... and I am late by a few months as I am suppose to go back home at last in the next few months.
But in my memory when I think of him... he's still the healthy, smiling uncle :)
Rest in peace my dearest uncle...
We are missing you and we will be always miss you.
