facing the past

Facing the past is really not easy, specially if it's about something that you don't really like to face.
I'm having it now.. to be honest.

but running away is not the answer, I know that.
The only way out is to facing it bravely.
Admit your mistakes.
Ask for forgiveness.

and that's what I'm doing now.

But behind all of these,
I realize that deep inside,
I am afraid..

afraid that my mistakes are not forgiven
afraid that the past problem will be present again
the problem that made me decided to end everything
..
until yesterday
when I realized.. the time is over.
It's been better for both of us
and as a friend,
I am bond to help
for friendship is the only thing that I can offer

and friendship is more pure than relationship
coz friendship is for eternity
a relation that can last what ever happen
without any need to have any feeling
it's just pure..

or at least, that's what I got from my best friends
I know, with them, I will never walk alone
what ever happen
they'll be there for me
and I'll be there for them.
None of them or us that will ever walk alone.
Except if one of us fall.. the others will not fall.
coz if everyone's fall.. who's going to help??
right?
XD

my last class in this semester

My last class in this semester is Wine and Bar class.
Yup, you can guess from the name..
it's all about liquid that contains Alcohol that you can drink.

in this last class, we studied about spirits.
gin, tequila, absinthe, etc.
these are the liquids that have high percentation in ABV (alcohol by volume).
Because in order to maintain the flavors of the spirit, they need alcohol.
good spirits have minimum of 37% in ABV, and sometimes you saw in bars that they could flame some of the spirits, it need at least 40% in ABV.

If you see the first picture, the first three glass from the left are spirits and the last glass is water.
the color of the spirits are clean, colorless, water white. you could easily be mistaken as water instead!! seriously..
but if you smell them.. you could smell something different..
so, that's how you could differentiate the good spirits with the bad spirits.
the good spirits with high alcohol, could maintain the smell even if you swirl the glass.. (usually you DON'T swirl the glass with spirits, you do it with wine, but not spirits)
so... if it's bad spirit.. with low alcohol.. it's going to hard to differentiate them with water without tasting them isn't it?
xp

the other way to test the quality of the spirits is by adding the equal amount of water to the spirit.
if you still could smell the flavor, it means it's a good one, if not..... it's going to be odorless.

oh yeah, the second glass is absinthe, you could see in the last picture that it's actually change it's color if you add water in it.
the color is cloudy, milky thing.
That's how to differentiate absinthe from the other spirits.

quite interesting isn't it?
but it's the hardest subject at the same time.
Most of the students failed this one.
Just hope that I could pass the final exam next week
xp

facing the past

I'm sorry I don't give you any of my news for a long time.
coz I think it's the best for both of us, at least, until the time is better.
I didn't forget you, just to tell you
but I don't have that feeling anymore, I'm sorry

I really hope that you can have a better life
I am
never meant to hurt you..
really..

specially in the worst of time of yours
though I want to comfort you, I don't know how

you said you still miss me.
I'm sorry for causing so much pain in you
I know how you feel and how hurts it could be
coz I've been in that position of yours myself..
and I'm sorry for that.

All that I can offer to you is friendship.
a pure friendship.
could you take that?
would you accept that?

my 2008 Resolution

I just read an email from my long lost auntie...
^^
It's been a long time since the last time we are in touch, and I'm really happy!!!
apparently she asked me about my 2008 resolutions, and I just realize that I need one after all!!!
Thanks for asking ^^
so, here we go...

• get honor for my first semester. it means that I must have 90 for my average, well, just hoping. hehe

• work well for my internship. I'm going to have my internship at school starting this 28 jan

• be independent. I wish I could save the money from my internship to support myself, so my parents just need to pay for my education and I could provide the rest of the money my self.. (oh I'm really wishing for this one)

• study well for my second year starting in September

• have fun, without doing the things that I already promised to my self that I will never do. Though most of my friends here doing them.

• get a good boyfriend (well, if God give me one.. hahaha, if not.. it's ok, I'm just gonna wait till I met the right one xp)

• have a better personality

need to study

this Monday.. kithcen exam.
this Tuesday.. French exam
this Friday.. information system exam.
and the next week....... the 'whole' exam is comin....

..
..
..
I have to study
I know I need to study
I really really have to start studying from NOW!!!!!!!
but.. .. .. ..
dunno why..
I don't have the spirit to study
I act as if as I'm still in a holiday

plizz
God, help me, give me spirit to study
avoid me from temptations NOT to study..
coz the only thing I need to do now is..
studying.