The Archives of Life

Unsure

2012-02-02T20:14:00.002+01:00

Today... the place that's famous for it's sunshine is grey. The cloud that brings rain has been staying over and doesn't any signs of moving out.

Sitting inside my room and looking out to the window... I only see wet roads with wet cars passing by. The sun is still too shy to show his face.

I'm stuck in this room, having a full list of what to do, but don't know how to start doing them. My future is just like the sky... cloudy and unclear.

"What should I do next?"
"How do I want to do it?"
"Do I really want it?"

Growing up is something that I embrace happily and sadly... Happy that at last a life that my decisions really make a point in my life, instead of someone else that make that decision for me has come. Sad and cautious that I'm not sure what to do with it... I'm not sure what I want. What that I'm thinking would be the best idea now, I might regret it one day in the future.

Should I do this... Should I do that.... hm.....

2012 Resolution

2012-01-03T03:14:00.002+01:00

Well... now that 2011 has ended.... way faster and sooner that I thought it would... with so many things happen and me that keep rushing from one point to another (you can see that I moved from Leysin to Zurich and then now in the United States...) (or from finishing dissertation to the last internship and to a training program..) - I still can't understand how time flew sometimes...

And just now, I review back my 2011 resolution, something that I haven't done since I actually wrote it... and I'm quite surprised actually that I've done it. I did my 2011 resolution. Well... apart from having my weight down to 58 kg, just because I don't have a scale and I don't really intend to know how much I weight at the moment lol. Not that I'm gaining so much that I'm afraid to look at it, but it's just that... well... as long as I'm still comfortable with myself, I don't think that the number on the scale really matters. I might even reach 58 kg at some point last year.

Oh well, I'm happy with my last year result... and now starts the new one :)

My 2012 Resolutions:

Keep reading books
Write every now and then
Learn to know my own needs and wants
Success my training
Find out the next plan (continue, or keep studying, or find a new job, or make my own living)
Have fun with friends while in the United States
Visit New York, Key West and San Fransisco
Learn to speak more German and or Spanish
Keep in Love :)

The Battle of Tera

2011-12-11T07:19:00.002+01:00

Okay, I found this movie by accident and just out of curiosity and boredom, I decided to actually watch it. I glad that I watched it though... it's actually a simple movie with a common theme and a predictable ending. Just another animation family movie.

However.. there is something in this movie that made me wonder. There is something in this movie that holds a possibility that I hadn't think about before.

It's actually about a planet called Tera with its friendly and peaceful inhabitants and how they encounter the human race that came to take their home because earth is no longer habitable and they are forced to find a new 'home' and of course... Tera is the destination.

And well, as you might also realize the nature of human race, the plan is to destroy the original life of the planet and enforced a new habitation more suitable for the humans. Yup... don't think of about negotiation or any sort of the ambassadors suppose to do, just sent the war planes.

However, the peaceful Tera-ians were originally not so peaceful.. they were as well, a race of war, and they do have the developed technology advanced enough to go face to face with the human's war technology.

It turns out that the Tera-ians itself was once almost extinct because of war and now they are teaching their children, the new generations about peace and life and forget the technology that they were once had as well as their destructive history and only the 'elders' that are aware of the truth.

The ending of the story is pretty dramatic but expected. The real hero (human) died in saving the Tera-ians and in return, they save the humans by building a habitation with atmosphere suitable for humans and the co-habitation of the planet.

--------------------------------

The thing that stuck in my mind right now... is....

Well... there is this theory that I heard or read about a few years ago, about the possibility that.. we are.. humans... are actually aliens on earth. There are a lot of questions about massive building technique or wisdom of the ancient civilization.. Somethings... that seems.. somekind of impossible for those "without technology" people.

And well.. according to this theory... It is because that humans are aliens and of course, as aliens.. we do have advanced technology. Advanced enough to make ships that travels the solar system and find a new planet to live on. It's just that.. there is this question... if we were.... why there are no records about that? Assuming that we are advanced enough to travel the universe, aren't those knowledge about space travel precious? about the ships are precious? why do we 'forget' those??

And now... maybe... and only maybe.. IF that theory is right... then.. MAYBE it's just because we had a very sad history previously.. and the people of that time decided that they would like to start brand new. Without the 'history' and without the technology. Maybe as well... in hope that they and their next generations would live in peace and without war.

Unfortunately.. if this were the truth, then their hope has failed... humans do have just in nature, in instinct, to destroy. Although we tried our best not to have war.. sometimes war is inevitable. What else is the reason for continuous war from the ancient civilization until now? Yes, until now! Our world is not peaceful at all, considering the small coups or riots in most of the countries to the more obvious right north and south korea or the middle east... It is... in human nature to strife for more.. to be greedy and strife for "safety" even if it costs someone else's "safety". If this is not... why do we still have war now?? we have failed to understand each other.

and currently.. our earth is also dying.. not soon... but slowly. It is already predicted that somewhere in the future... our descendants might have to leave earth and find a new planet to live on. It is not in doubt that the technology to support human life continuously in space is being researched or if not developed..

and might be... the history will repeat somewhere in the far corner of the universe....

The good things that happen today

2011-10-12T05:32:00.004+02:00

Today, well... I'm still nervous for my new work... Then several things happen...

Yesterday, I got an unknown caller on my cell during work orientation, of course I'm not picking it up and I have no idea who it was, and as usual, I'm not so interested to find out who... If it was important enough, they will call later, was my thought. But my boyfriend was asking me to call back. I wasn't really enthusiast about it, and I think he noticed that and gave me a hint that he knew who called.

That's it, my curiosity is at the maximum level, and I failed to make him break the news to me. I went to sleep with several guesses about what could it be... .. ..

So, yes, I can't wait to call the 'mystery' caller again and until I got them... it turns out to be a florist!! Okay, so it's flowers... :)
Unfortunately though that they can't deliver after 5pm and most probably I would be at home after 5 pm.... >.<
So... basically, they have to deliver it to my work place!! uh oh... it's gonna take some people attention.. and I don't want it... I'm not so comfortable to be on the spotlight sometimes.. depends on the situation.. and I think it's one of it..
I love the flowers, but I'm not thrilled about the part that it has to be delivered to my work place. Because, I have to tell some people about it to let the delivery able to come inside the area and deliver it, and as I was still in the orientation, they have to put the flowers somewhere else first and so and so...

But oh well... in the end I got the delivery... with even an extra surprise... a Teddy Bear!!!!

I do love roses, and yes I love teddy bears as well.... I was a little bit sad that I had to leave my teddy bears with him because I don't have any space to bring them to the states.. and now that I got one.. and it's from him.... :D :D :D :D

I am very happy :) Love love love love him so much :)

Ps: I got a fortune cookie tonight, and it says 'Someone is speaking well of you'. Well, in the position of new job... I do hope that it's true :) It really chase away all of the worries that I had :)

Iron Iron Iron

2011-10-11T04:33:00.002+02:00

Okay.... I never dislike ironing before.... really, it's not my favorite job, but I don't dislike it either. But since yesterday and today.... I spent like an hour ironing... and I still have more ironing stuff to do actually....

Rolling and folding your clothes to little pieces is great for packing since you would be able to pack more... but really...

IT MADE YOU DO ENDLESS IRONING!!

So... I have made one more decision to remember..

DO NOT PURCHASE ANY CLOTHES THAT WILL REQUIRE LOTS OF IRONING!!

Yup, from now on, I will put that into my consideration in purchasing my clothes... if it made from the kind of fabric that you don't need to iron... PERFECT!!!! :D

Swiss Hotel Management School

2011-10-07T06:34:00.002+02:00

I think.. I'm the same as most of the other students in the world... Criticizing their school/university most of the time but adores them still deep inside..

I would say I could find a lot of flaws of this school that I was attending, but was I happy when I was there? yes. Was I satisfied with my school? Maybe not really.. but yes I do as well. It is one of the greatest chapter in my life, and I had learn so many things in that place. So many things that I doubted I would get in other places, or even if I do.. it wouldn't be the same. It is the place that had shaped the 'me' right now. The place that I learned a new perspective in life and where my 'young' personality developed to a more mature personality that I had now.

Anyway, I read this article about the top 10 Hospitality schools in the world, and I was shocked... I knew that my school, SHMS, is in it.. But that it will be on the second place??? WOW WOW WOW!!!!!!!!

I had no other words... I am just... PROUD :)

Top 10 international hotel schools favoured for use by the International hospitality industry

1. Ecole Hôtelière de Lausanne

2. Swiss Hotel Management School

3. Les Roches International School of Hotel Management

4. Cesar Ritz Colleges Switzerland

4. Glion Institute of Higher Education

6. Hotel Institute Montreux

7. Ecole Hôtelière de Genève

8. IHTTI, School of Hotel Management in Neuchâtel

9. The Hague Hotel School International University of Hospitality Management The Hague

10. Zurich Belvoir Park

GfK Switzerland july 2011

New Chapter in Life

2011-10-07T06:06:00.003+02:00

The time has been running up too fast for me for the past year. My last semester in university gone like in a blink of an eye. Suddenly I had been parted with my friends.. suddenly and miraculously, I have finished my dissertation and now I am officially graduated with Second Class degree First Division... Something that I thought not gonna be that easy for me to get....

I have tried though, to make the fullest of my last semester in university. I wrote down a list of what I want to do, unfortunately I wasn't able to cross all of them. But I had fun creating it, as well as trying to cross the list one by one. Of course, there is a little regret that there are things that I still want to do before I'm graduated... but I guess it is okay and I had the most fun that I could get already. :)

At the beginning of the year... my future seems so much clouded, I don't know where I would be in the coming few months. There was so much worries, so many uncertainties...

Thankfully though, I got a job offer in Zurich just in the time that I need it. Just when I finished my dissertation then I boarded the train off to the biggest city in the country, leaving my little hometown in Switzerland, hoping for a new experience and I welcomed the stability and the little sight of my future, at least for the coming six months.

The job turns out to be great, I love the people, I love the restaurant, I love the new friendships that came along, and I even fell in love... and the least expected moments in my life, this person came and took my world to him. With him, everything just seems to be right, even though it feels like a roller coaster ride in the same time. The speed is a little bit scarifying but exciting in the same time. In just a little time, it feels that I knew him for a life time. Everyday is nice and precious to just let go.. especially knowing that we don't have much time to be together.

My next job had came to light, and everything is settled. I got my visa and I was going to the United States. This.. is going to be my home for the next one year.

I never like saying good byes... I hate it when I have to go and things could never come back to the way they used to be. The people.. the places.. even if I returned.. I know somehow it's not gonna be the same. I can only remember them as memories. I wasn't happy to leave the country that I called home for four years even though this is not my home country.
I wasn't happy to leave the friendships that had developed with the people here.
Especially, I wasn't happy to leave my schatzly.

But things in life... sometimes you have to let them go and embrace the new chapter of your life.

So... here I am, in United States, going to start my new job on Monday, still adapting to the new environments... and of course, missing this one person in another continent and hoping that the new job will allow me to still keep in contact with him everyday.

Last Days in University

2011-02-05T16:51:00.003+01:00

Yup... something that I honestly didn't want to come to an end yet... my school life with my friends. Now I'm officially don't have any more classes to attend. Most of my friends already gone either back to their home to other places that they should be now. I doubt that I would ever be able to see half of them in the future. It would be very difficult for me to see some of them again, since I don't know when or where that I would be able to see them again. Only some of my friends that are still left here, the ones that I could still meet and talk to in person.

Our last day past hardly with any real goodbyes thanks to the reports that confined us to our own space and as long as they're not finished, no one is happy to be disturbed. I only able to say my farewell to some of them in person, the rest are through online medias and some were very late that the next news I knew that they're at their home country already.

It is sad of course... how I wished that I could keep them next to me so we could still have fun together. Well, it didn't happen of course, I don't have any power on earth to make other people follow my wishes on a whim.

But in the same time, I'm happy that the graduation ceremony that was held a week ago enabled me to meet with my old friends, the graduating ones. It was such a nice couple of days that I could spent with them.. too bad that it's over too soon for me. Only for a few days and they're gone again, continue their own lives.

and here I am... still stuck on the place I am now, the place that I reluctant to let go, the place that I've called home for 4 years....

I know soon that I'll leave this place, very soon I'll find my other paths to other places. Even though I, myself don't know where I would be in a few months for now, it could be here in Switzerland, USA, Hong Kong, or even home... I don't know, I am just a windflower ready to be flown away by the wind, but doesn't know where it would be.

I could only wish all the best now for all of my friends, and hopefully fate is kind enough to let us meet again somehow somewhere in the future :)

The kind of conversation you have on your last weeks of university

2011-01-19T16:37:00.003+01:00

Here's one piece of conversation that we had during lunch today.....

Oh, here's some piece of information you'll need to understand the conversation below:

skip 3 times: verbal warning
skip 5 times: kicked out of the subject (you DON'T want this to happen)
next week is the last week of our university, and it means classes are over :D but.. also the deadline for all those monstrous reports..........

A: I don't want to come to class today..
B: No one wants to go to that class...
A: I think I'll skip.
C: Ugh.. I can't skip anymore, I already skip 2 times and I'm planning to skip next week. So...
B: Yea A, come for today and we'll skip all of the classes for next week.
A: But I don't think going to that class will give me anything useful..
B: No, we'll go to class today and we'll skip for the last week... c'mon A..
C: Yea, go to class today and we'll skip next week.
A: But I want to skip today AND next week as well
D: But then you'll miss too many classes
B: Yea, and xxx (censored for everyone's peacefulness) for sure will do the absences without fail.
A: I only skip xxx class once, so I can skip now, and the 2 classes next week as well. Coz that means I only skipped 4 times, and verbal warning at the end of semester is totally useless.
D: oh... wow... you only skipped once?
A: yup..
B: I already skipped twice... so.. c'mon A, go to class today and we'll skip all of next week classes together!!
A:..... I don't want to... it's useless......
C: oh there's xxx!! Now A.. you can't skip anymore
B: yup, xxx knows that you're here!!!
A: %^(*&%$#$%^&&*

In the class before it starts...

E: someone please tell me what are we doing here??
A: that's exactly what I'm thinking about!!!
E: yea.. what's this gathering about???
A: I just hope it's going to be something useful...... really.....
E: nah... we're going to waste our time.. again..

What I WILL have in the future

2011-01-07T15:42:00.005+01:00

Today I just realized that there are so many things that I want to do and have, or rather that I'm sure I WILL have in the future but I don't have them now.

I just went back from horse riding after haven't ridden one for a long time, and then when I'm just resting a bit, I heard a classic music in piano and it really made me want to play my piano. I realized that there are so many things that I missed from home, and how different my life here, independently and at home when I am dependent to my big family.

Life here is harder, I really need to put on account on everything that I want to buy, because I earned the money myself and the money would not come by itself like magic. Not like when I was still with my parents when I can just ask them that I want that thing or I need that thing, and the next thing was me, obtaining the things that I want. Well, a little bit of persuading is needed of course, but I know I could get it easy.

Here I don't have the luxury of home, the super nice bed and room, nice food without me have to cook or cleaning before and after, when I can just relax, drive my own car, play piano whenever I want and have lavish parties every now and then with my family and friends. No.. not here, not now. Everything need to be budgeted if I don't want to go broke in the middle of the road and have no money to do anything at all.

Well, I'm used to it. To live economically and super saving.
But also, how I realized that I don't want to live like this forever. I'm going to earn lots of money. I'm going to be able to live like I used to be (I know this is very selfish). I don't know how but I know I would be able to live like that again someday :D

And so.. I'm making a list of the things that I WILL have in the future :D

Grand piano
Nice house
A horse
A yacht
A couple of nice cars
A Siberian Husky
More lenses for my Nikon D90
Telescope

2011 Resolution

2011-01-07T15:35:00.002+01:00

Ok... here we go...

* Graduate!!!
* Get a job
* Scratch off the things to do before graduation list
* Get the weight down to at least 58 kg
* Improve photography skills
* Start to think about my own business
* Keep in touch with my university friends

Ok short one :D but at least it would be easier to keep!!!

Make up.....

2010-11-29T23:16:00.004+01:00

I don't know why... suddenly I'm looking at the make up tutorial videos in YouTube....

Honestly, I'm not really a make up girl, most of the days you'll find me without make up. Even if I do wear make up, most likely it's only an eyeliner and a little bit of eye brows and that's all seriously.

If you saw me in a full make up... which is very very rare... usually it's for a very important party like my family wedding or something. Even I don't wear proper make up for my diploma graduation ceremony.... I know sometimes I'm pathetic as a girl.. My mother, aunties even grand aunt already suggest me to wear more make up, and encourage me to do it every single day....

Well.... they succeed to make me wear make up more often.. but still not everyday :D

It's not that I can't do make up... I can..
But... well... I'm just too lazy most of the time. Make up took time, and honestly sometimes make up bothers me. If suddenly it rains or you did something that made you sweat.. your appearance is even worse with make up.. Okay, you can wear waterproof products... but then you also need to use special other product to actually clean your face.

Oh there you go, another part that I don't like... cleaning your face took longer than usual plus also the feeling of wearing make up somehow makes my face oilier... and I don't like that.

hahaha yup, it's just all of the reasons why I don't wear make up most of the time...

Though I also realize that it's impossible for me to not wear make up especially later on when I'm officially in the career path. Make up is part of woman's clothes. Sooner or later I do need to wear make up....... >.< I guess... I really need to accustom myself to use make up from now... well... not the full fledged make up of course... just a simple one... maybe more on the eye... or maybe with powder.... not lipstick... I don't like those since I was young. :D I remembered when I was little, I was one of the bride's maid for my uncle's wedding, so they put make up on me. But I hate the feeling of wearing lipstick.. when no one was looking, I took it off hahahahahahaha :D

Anyway... from the videos that I watched.. This girl that doing the tutorial video, she also gave tips for healthier skin.. and yups.. it goes back to a healthy life style. I guess I do need to improve my healthy life style again... I did improve it before but then it goes back again to the unhealthy style... and now... I guess I really do put back the standard and improve :D

Well.. if I have a nicer skin.. it means less make up!!!! hahahahaha

Pressure's off but here he comes again...

2010-11-24T15:40:00.003+01:00

Yup, did I ever tell you that I had a very relax days last week? Just because my midterm is past? and then we started totally with new subjects on the second part of the semester? Means that now we're just starting again and it also means that the projects would be far off later on?

Truth is... all of the above is just 'or so I thought...'

Last time... I could say I was underestimating my projects, I'm not really prepared yet for them and suddenly the deadline is in front of my eyes and I really felt that I should have done better by preparing better. I should have done it earlier is the sentence that always rang in my head. Not that I don't have enough time to do them, I do have enough time, I could finish all of them on time...
But still... I think I could have done better.

So.. here I am, in my second week of new subjects, sitting in the Library with books around me.
Yeah.. no kidding.....

I know some people do thought of me as a nerd or a diligent student or something. Truth is... I'm not as nerdy as they thought. I do take my time to relax, watch movies, going out, do my stuff and put my projects on a later date. Usually there are people pushing me around to finish my things early, that's how I finished early.
I remember during my high school, there are several people that always waiting for my home works because they need to copy it or to make it as the base of their work... so they keep pushing and asking me when I am finished.... That's how I actually finished my projects earlier.. and now without them catching my tails all the time, I'm pretty relax, and that's the truth.

So.. I think it's because of that thought of I should have done better, that drives me to start early. I made it clear in my calendar of when I should start doing each of my project and the preparation. I'm actually also glad that I had a new friend that is a workaholic, she started way early and done so many things... I think it's also a push factor for me to actually focus and serious at my studies and projects.

And yes, I have decided to be the good student that start the projects early, do a proper research about them and make a nicely done reports. I'll start early now, well, it's not bad for an ending of university life in this school on the top of the ski resort mountain of mine right? It's time to actually practice the slogan of "work hard and play hard" :D

Sorry that I loved you..

2010-11-13T20:48:00.003+01:00

This is for someone that once I loved selfishly and forget selfishly....

I forgot when I actually came across this song.. but when I listened to it.. A certain someone came across my mind. I guess this song is perfect to described my feeling for him. And if he ever could listen to this song, I hope he'll know and understand.

Such a Blessing.....

2010-11-08T20:21:00.002+01:00

I love learning aikido and shinkendo so I decided to continue and try to find a place which is accessible for me. Luckily I could find one from a teacher came from another city, he came every Monday to the Japanese School here in my city, and I can join them. I felt so happy that I could continue my hobby.

Though yeah... there are some hardships that I need to handle, I need to walk up to the Japanese school like 20-25 minutes walking up the mountain and now in the winter, with all of the snows. Also how to cope up with all of my reports in school..

But then I decided that I need to do some exercise, and this is my hobby too. So it's just something like a force to myself that I need to do some exercise each week and I need to be able to manage my time better. Even like now in my reports week, but I decided to still go. Partly, it's also because the class is so small and I don't feel comfortable to skip classes. The teacher had been so nice to drive up here for like 45 minutes drive from his town.

Apparently he is also a very gentle and nice person. He asked me if my parents going to pay for the lessons, so I answers the truth, no I'm paying it. Then he just torn the payment paper and said that I don't need to pay. He was so nice........... Actually I don't mind paying even honestly I also have a tight budget.

Actually, I am in a state of saving money because I'm not sure if I'm going to be employed later on, and so I need to save as much money as possible for savings later on. And this news came when I'm somehow trapped between unfinished reports.. I took it as such a blessing. Thanks God, thanks my teacher :)

So I have decided that I'm going to make cake/cookies to the class next time when I have time to make it :)

Ok now... I really really need to go back to the reports >.<

"Eyjafjallajokull"

2010-11-04T19:27:00.005+01:00

I was reading CNN news about Qantas' Engine Failure that happen today (another excuse just to delay my report..), and I came across this..

-----

The incident happened in the same region as Indonesian volcano Mount Merapi, which is now active. Could this have been a factor?

Investigators will look at all possibilities. Earlier this year, no-fly zones were imposed across Europe due to ash clouds from Iceland's Eyjafjallajökull. It was feared that dust and ash from the volcano might damage airplane engines.

-----

I was like... "What??? How do you pronounce that thing????". I believe you would see straight away which word that I mean by it, or of course it's in the title of this blog entry anyway.
and so, my journey of research takes course (far away from the research that I should be doing now of course :D)..

It turns out that.. I'm not alone. It is an unspeakable word, there are so many people, who try to pronounce it, and FAIL... The greatest part is to actually listen to the news reporters and how much chaos it brings to the audio-visual news industry!! Everyone was like "How do we pronounce it??" "What's the right pronunciation?"

Of course it's a super challenge for poor news reporter/reader around the globe. Some were trying hard to "try" to pronounce it, some were AVOIDING it, and some, being creative, gave it a nickname. Yup a nickname.
This tragedy had become a global news reporters comedy. Especially for the Icelanders, the way these people try to pronounce the name of the mountain was hilarious. You could find various videos in YouTube of official airing from world-known NEWS TV channel on "how to pronounce it correctly guide".. I mean.. how often could you see these things on TV?? :D

Here is some of the reporters refer for "the" volcano / nicknames:
"The Unspeakable Volcano"
"Icelandic Volcano"
"Icelandic Volcano Tongue Twister"
"Bob"
"E15"
"Volcano"

Yes.. I know that this is too late already that I just knew about this name... but I do know when the volcano erupts, but I'm not really exposed to any world news here in Switzerland to be honest, and when I read the reports about this volcano eruptions, it was only stated as "Iceland's Volcano".... they never said the name!!!!! (which I could understand why...), and so.. I just knew about it..

Multi Cultural Diversity Problems in Movies

2010-10-29T16:49:00.004+02:00

Few days ago, when I was "trying" to do my reports, like always, I ended up doing something else. This time.. I ran to youtube and found this old videos of The King and I that was produced half a century ago. It's about a widowed English woman who went to Siam Kingdom (Thailand at present) to teach the King's son. She ended up teaching all of his children and some of his wives and concubines.

I have watched the new version of the movie (Anna and The King) a few times before, but it was long time ago and I don't remember it well anymore. But the original version is interesting as well. I took me time to find the original movie, but then I managed it. It's a cute black & white movie, I love the children of the king, they left a big impression when they first appear. There are some differences from the plot of the story with the new one, but both are interesting. I like the King in the original version better though, maybe he looks like my old crush hahahahaha.

Something that I realized when I watched the movie is that unconsciously I was analyzing them!!! Thanks to the Multi Cultural Diversity subject at school I believe.. It's not really obvious in the original movie, maybe because it's more to the musical and drama side rather than giving a little bit more authenticity of the situations while the newer version is more to drama and action but in a more realistic side.

It's incredible how I notice things without actually want to notice it. Like the way they bow in the western society and the eastern society, like her head must never be higher than the king's and how the Thai's custom to put touch their forehead to the floor when they saw the king or no one is allowed to stand in the presence of the king.

The funny part is also when they called her 'Sir', since in their culture no woman could get a formal audience with the important people, therefore they called her 'Sir'. lol
She was also angry when the prime minister asked personal questions to her when she first arrived and she just want to get it done to the 'business' and the prime minister doesn't like it coz it is a custom to know the person personally before going down to 'business'.

The part that the son of Anna confused about why the king has so many wives were also interesting. Since in the west, they only accept monogamy while it is very common for the kings in the east to have hundreds of wives. Anna herself found it uncomfortable to answer that.

There are also lots of other topics that were in the movie such as slavery, torture of the prisoners, the degradation of women, the table manners, dancing, way of dress, cultural beliefs and other things that I don't remember now or even unnoticed by me.

Funny Quotes from The King and I (the way I remember it anyway):

King: "Oh you come to apologize"
Anna: "I'm sorry your majesty but...
King: "Do it and apologize!!"
Anna: "Your Majesty.. I.....
King: "I accept!"
Anna: "Your Majesty, nothing had been said and all the fact that...
King: "Sileeeeennceee....."

King: "I only have 10* children I know it's not much compared to the Emperor of China cause I only have 2* wives and 5* concubines. You see, I spent half of my life in the monastery and I've been trying to make it up. And oh, 10 children is coming"

King: "A girl must be.. like a blossom with honey.. for just 1 man. A man must live like honey bee... and gather all he can.. To fly from blossom to blossom.... A honeybee must be free... But blossom must not ever fly..... from bee.. to bee.. to bee.."

King: "1 2 3, 1 2 3..... something wrong. Oh I forgot and!!! 1 2 3 and 1 2 3 and.."

Anna and The King:

Prime Minister: "If this thing is going on, she would be the equal of a man"
King: "Not the equal of a man, prime minister, but the equal of the king"

If I die young....

2010-10-24T00:31:00.002+02:00

I just listen to a song cover by Sam Tsui and Kurt Schneider... If I Die Young.....

Well.. I'm not planning to end my life young, no I don't... but who could know what will happen? I hope I could live forever young.. but again, it's impossible unless vampires are real and I could become one. :D

But well no one could tell when someone would die, it's all in the God's hands. So... just in case if something happens to me and I die young... I would like to tell this to everyone...

Believe me.. I have enjoyed my life the fullest.

I have fell in love and experienced it.
I have lots of my friends that I could trust and share my life with.
I have seen half of the world with my own eyes.
I have played music, sung and danced to my heart content with all the melodies of the world.
I have met lots of people from all over the world that left tiny little foot steps in my life.
I have experienced flying.
I have swam in the ocean, lake and river.
I have went to the jungle, climbed the trees and experience the nature.
I have read hundreds of stories and create some.
I have taste lots of wonderful and amazing foods from all over the world.
I have seen the world from my point of view, learned the magic and fell in love with it.

I could say that I have no regret in my life, perhaps my biggest regret and despair is to die before my mother and father.

But believe me, if I die... I would be flying with the stars and explore the galaxies like I used to dream when I was young, I would be happy and you should too.

If I die young bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Send me away with the words of a love song
then you can go and celebrate
coz I'm going to a much better place
I would be singing and dancing all day
with no more worries and pain

Things to do before Graduation

2010-10-23T23:32:00.003+02:00

Today I watched a short movie made by Kurt Schneider in YouTube.. It's basically a short movie made for the graduation.. It's sweet in a way and cute too.

One think that actually gave me inspiration is to make a to do list before graduation. This semester is also my last semester in university. I might not be taking any other education program which means it might be my last chance on experiencing university life.. It hits me like a big stone in the face... I never actually considered it that way, and now that I realized it.... I need to make my own list..

I don't want to graduate with any regrets about things that I've never done in university life. :D

I've started to make my list, and it also surprised me... I haven't done any crazy things during my university life.. I guess it's a good sign.. but also.. I think I need to experience the crazy things too.. coz it's my last chance anyway.

I have never been drunk before in my whole life.. but yea.. I guess I need to try it once.

I have never celebrate Halloween with really dressed up, so... this is also my last chance.

You could also say that I never make a move to the person that I fell in love with, and I think I need to do it too... well... if I fell in love in this last semester though.. if it's not.. then... it's fine :D

Ok.. this one is from my room mate, when I asked her for her suggestions and opinion... she told me that I need to just kiss a random cute guy. Because she said.. c'mon it's university life, you need to do that at least once!! Well... I guess that's true too.. I never kissed any guy which is not my boyfriend before... and yea... it's crazy university life anyway :D

I'll keep this list and up date it from time to time... I don't want to have any regrets when I'm graduating because of the things that I didn't do before... ^^

BA update

2010-10-20T12:37:00.002+02:00

Well, well......

I haven't updated anything for sometimes now.... well... truthfully I'm busy, but also.. occupied and of course... forgot hahaha..

The first snow has fell down here a couple of days ago, but ti's still a wet snow and it doesn't stay at all on the ground... so you can say it's like rain still, but it will be white and pretty soon :)
I also heard rumors from Asia that this year's winter is the coldest winter in 100 years....... Well.. it's not a good news at all for me. I'm living 15 minutes from school now and if it's going to be very cold... then it won't be good for me!! and I really hope that it's only a rumor, I mean... there's no such news about it here... so... it's only a rumor right?? :D

I have submitted the proposal of my dissertation, it's not as easy as I thought it would be honestly, but I think it should be okay. There are some things that I'm worrying about, like the way I'm going to do my primary research, seriously it's not really reliable way... but... I can't do it reliably. I don't have the time, connection or funds to do the proper research. So.. we'll see about the comments about it soon.

After the proposal... basically I'm in such a relax mood.. so I started watching some cartoons.. the "Nurarihyon no Mago" and "Avatar, the Last Airbender" :D
I love both of the cartoons a lot. Especially I also enjoy the opening song in Nurarihyon no Mago.. and it turns out that the band is Canadian-Japanese with this weird name "Monkey Majik", but they're amazing and I love all of their songs so far and so in love with the melody. Their songs already keep playing in my mind for a few days now but still persistent there :). If there's a guy that I quite like and sing "With You" by the band... I would be in love hahahahahaha.

Talking about love... my other best friend also just got a boyfriend recently. It's a nice event, since I could see that she's much happier now and the guy is also a good guy :D. And myself?? Still the same as always hahaha. Maybe I'm too picky, but lots of other girls also agree that in our environment right now there's not much decent choice.. so it's not only me! hahaha

So... also... why do I suddenly remember the blog?? Well.. got to write some reflective log for one of my assignments... yup.. it's just reminded me of this blog hahahahaha

well... back to the original plan.... assignments!!!! :D

Sadest Video Clip

2010-09-16T22:12:00.002+02:00

Ok, I know it's a very very old video clip.. I think I watched this video the first time when I was in high school and that means around 6 years ago?? But still... this video was imprinted in my mind as the most sad video that I have ever seen. Then I saw the videos again, and then I found this one with the english subtitles of what the actual lyric means... this music video became even sweeter and sad...

Here is the lyric with the translation that I found in a blog :)

Dodeche ar suga obso namjadurui maum
wonhar ten onjego da juni ije tonande
ironjog choumirago nonun thugbyorhadanun
gu marur midosso negen hengbogiosso

I just cant understand the hearts of men
they tell you they want you and then they leave you
this is the first time, you're special
I believed those words and I was so happy

marur haji guresso nega shirhojyoda go
nunchiga obnun nan nur bochegiman hesso
norur yoghamyonsodo manhi guriurgoya
sarangi jonbuin nanun yojainika

you should have told me you didn't like me any more
but I couldn't see that and you just rushed me
although I will curse you I'll still miss you
since I am a girl, to whom love is everything

modungor swibge da jumyon gumbang shirhjungnenunge
namjara durosso thollin mar gathjin anha
dashinun sogji anhuri maum mogo bojiman
todashi sarange munojinunge yoja ya

i heard that if you give up things too easily
to a man, he will get bored with you
i don't think this is wrong
a girl says that she will never be fooled again
but she will fall in love again

marur haji guresso nega shirhojyodago
nunchiga obnun nan nur boche giman hesso
norur yoghamyonsodo manhi guriurgoya
sarangi jonbuin nanun yojainika

you should have told me you didn't like me any more
but I couldn't see that and you just rushed me
although I will curse you I'll still miss you
since I am a girl, to whom love is everything

[narration] Onur urin heojyosso budi hengbogharago
noboda johun sarammannagir barandago
nodo darun namjarang togathe nar saranghanda go marhanten onjego
sorjighi na nega jar doenungo shirho
naboda yepun yoja manna hengboghage jar sarmyon otohge
guroda nar jongmar ijoborimyon otohge
nan irohge himdunde himduro juggenunde
ajigdo nor nomu saranghanunde

[narration]
Hey babe
the pain
it's not enough to describe how i feel
we were so happy together
but I know now
I've been blind
you told me that you'd never let me down
whenever I needed you you'd always be here
I can forgive but I cant forget
even though you hurt me
I still love you
I still love you

sarangur wihesoramyon modun da har su inun
yojaui chaghan bonnungur iyong hajinun marajwo
hanyojaro theona sarangbadgo sanunge
irohge himdurgo oryourjur mollasso

don't take advantage of a girl's willingness to do anything for love
and her caring instinct
i didn't know that to be born as a girl and to be loved was so hard
although i will curse you i'll still miss you
since i am a girl, to whom love is everything
although i will curse you i'll still miss you
since i am a girl, to whom love is everything

Narration (Guy, only in the music video)
There's someone I'm in love with...
Although I can't be with her now...
I'm still in love with her...

BA life is Starting...

2010-09-10T13:35:00.002+02:00

My first week of BA has past now.

So.. how's my impression? It would be a very exciting semester I guess. Lots of my friends had gone because they have finished their BA while I'm doing the optional internship. I was afraid that I won't have much friends this semester but I was wrong. I made a lot of new friends :)

Though it's very different with the past few years of education, but I feel very excited and challenged now. Yes, it is harder. Yes I would need to put lots of efforts for this semester. But yes, I am excited as well. We need to read so many things just by the first week!! Well, the motto of the year is read, read, read and more reading. No joking, that's all the teacher was saying in the class. It seems that by the end of the term I would be falling in love deeply with those books.

But why am I so excited?
At last I felt that I'm really in a university and no longer in high school. I decided to live outside the school with one of my best friends, so we actually had to walk up and down every single day, which most of the normal university people need to do. We had a lot of independent studies now. More individual reports too. So... I think I'm going to enjoy this last semester :D

Things to do:
- buy the Lebara mobile number
- upload holiday pictures in Facebook
- read the article and book for MCD
- read the article for ACB
- make the power point for ACB
- read and do the test for CI
- sign up for IRF & the workshop
- update CV
- make the dissertation topic
- contact Royal Caribbean for primary research permission

Diet Program

2010-06-30T21:15:00.003+02:00

Yup, the title says it all... I'm planning on a diet. Why? Because my parents are coming. My mother actually that matters.. she always complains about my body condition which is, well... a bit overweight. Honestly, I never even bother to weight myself, cause I simply don't care. As long as I still could fit into my clothes, though I know already I'm a bit overweight, but as long as I didn't go to a big big overweight... I don't care. :D

But well... having my mom complains to me everyday, then followed by the whole family.. It's just like an echo that keeps ringing inside my head (because it's going to be very often said to me every single day..) is not something that I want. So... here we go.. less than a month diet.

I just read several sites about dieting and how to lose weight etc. etc., and.. I made a list that I COULD take (which means the ones that goes too extreme like weighting the rice that your going to eat goes out of the list straight away lol), and the things that are already in my habit, means I don't put it anymore :D

Here you go, the list that I got in my hand:

Drink lots and lots of water
Eat lots of vegetables and fruits (must present in every meal of the day)
Eat low calorie snacks
You still can eat your favorite food, no matter what it is, just in a smaller portion (or take it to hiking picnic, so you need to exercise before and after the meal)
Eating smaller portion of meals, more often if needed
Higher protein diet, especially breakfast (yoghurt, nuts, beans)
Get 8 hours of sleep [Gosh.. this one's going to be difficult..]
Aromatherapy could help
Spice your food (black pepper, ginger, chili pepper) [I love this one ^^]
Drink green tea [this too]
Don't drink too much while eating
Eat slowly
Skip desserts [T.T.... I love love love desserts T.T]
Take calcium into the diet (1 glass of skim milk before and after sleep)
Walk, walk, walk (don't use elevator, take longer route)
No alcohol [it's not that I'm a heavy drinker or something, but it's just means that I have to say no every time I got the chance socially to drink one]
Spread out the exercise (a little exercise here and there is better than 3 hours straight kind of exercise)

Ps: it is recommended to skip the diet SOMETIMES and not all the time, just to keep your mental healthy :D

Oh no!! it's 9.30 PM!!!!! I need to sleep at 10.00 PM if I want to get my 8 hours sleep!!!!!!
Well... we'll see how much can I reduce the fat in my belly LOL

Les Miserables

2010-06-04T19:50:00.005+02:00

I'm in love......

I am deeply in love with 'Les Miserables'. I first knew about this opera when I was still a French language student in Jakarta. They were having this opera in Jakarta. I got the chance to see it. But as it was not familiar with me, and no one that could really accompany me to go there, I let the chance pass. I didn't even bother with it that much, which I regretted now.

Then... I heard this song.. 'I dream a dream' sang by Susan Boyle, the song was so sweet that I really love it straight away. Then again, I heard it in Glee, it still charms me. And so, just by curiosity I search it in YouTube, to see the original singer. I was surprised that it's actually a song from a play, Les Miserables, a play that I got the chance to see!!!!!

The video that I saw was a concert rather than a play actually, but the singers was so awesome, they are full with the characters. You can really feel their emotions inside the song, it's so beautiful. I end up watching the whole series of the concert..., and I fell in love.

The story itself is actually quite devastating, as the title itself, "Les Miserables", though it's originally in French, the language I mean, but in this concert, they sung it in English. I was truly satisfied though, since I understand English much more than my limited French, and so I can understand all the 'dialogs', which is one of the most interesting part. But something for sure, the songs... it's so incredible, beautiful, sweet, but very realistic. It really shows how the world could be such a dreadful place for some people, how luck could goes for such scoundrels, but how some people could still live their life with such hope and love...

Here is some of my favorite songs :)

Upcoming Holidays......

2010-05-28T14:22:00.002+02:00

Life is sooooo nice when you're having somethings to wait for. It's true right?

My life before was just normal, so-so, and a bit down when I knew that I might not be able to go back home again for this year. Especially when my friends and I actually planning somethings back home. Yeah... we were planning to have a trip around Java Island... T.T

Too bad that my parents decided to come here instead and my plan to go on a vacation with my friends back home has to be thrown out of the widow.

With my parents coming, I feel happy too though, it's been a long time since I have a proper holiday with them. :)

Then my uncle and aunt decided to join my parents, and they want to go on a cruise... Hm.. I've never been to a cruise before.. so... okay, I think I'm going to like it. And then.. my family asked me to look at the cruises, see if I'm going to like it, then I'm starting to see all of the options and things that I could do while cruising... It seems FANTASTIC...

I know, they have great marketing there lol... Then, booking and then planning further make it even more exciting :)
Right now, it's 7 of us that are going on a cruise, yup, my grand-uncle and grand-aunt is coming too. Now it has become a big family vacation.

Soon me and my friends will go to Venice :) It's really something to wait for. Venice is one of my favorite city to visit. It's an old city that's very beautiful. And before it disappears to the ocean, we should visit it!!!

On September, I'm also going to watch Cirque du Soleil Varekai ^^
I have watch Cirque du Soleil Corteo before, and it's so amazing, that I will never forget that show. It's actually one of a push factor for me to pursue hospitality and event subject that I'm studying now.

My friends and I even made a presentation about logistic of this circus last semester, and finding more informations about it really made us more impressed by it. And now that a chance came up for us to see it, we're not going to let it pass :D

Puzzle Time :)

2010-04-09T12:09:00.002+02:00

Yup, I loves puzzles, especially this type of puzzle... solved one before about 5 houses, and was just trying to solve it again and see if there are other puzzles with similar type.. and I got it!!!!!

Trying to solve this yesterday for an hour I guess.. it's harder than the 5 houses, but it's so much fun!!!!!!

Try it if you love puzzle as much as I do :)

From http://brainden.com/einsteins-riddles.htm

Meeting (meet this challenge)

Another hard nut to crack (just like Einstein's) was published in the QUIZ 11/1986.
Eight married couples meet to lend one another some books. Couples have the same surname, employment and car. Each couple has a favorite color. Furthermore we know the following facts:

Daniella Black and her husband work as Shop-Assistants.
The book "The Seadog" was brought by a couple who drive a Fiat and love the color red.
Owen and his wife Victoria like the color brown.
Stan Horricks and his wife Hannah like the color white.
Jenny Smith and her husband work as Warehouse Managers and they drive a Wartburg.
Monica and her husband Alexander borrowed the book "Grandfather Joseph".
Mathew and his wife like the color pink and brought the book "Mulatka Gabriela".
Irene and her husband Oto work as Accountants.
The book "We Were Five" was borrowed by a couple driving a Trabant.
The Cermaks are both Ticket-Collectors who brought the book "Shed Stoat".
Mr and Mrs Kuril are both Doctors who borrowed the book "Slovacko Judge".
Paul and his wife like the color green.
Veronica Dvorak and her husband like the color blue.
Rick and his wife brought the book "Slovacko Judge" and they drive a Ziguli.
One couple brought the book "Dame Commissar" and borrowed the book "Mulatka Gabriela".
The couple who drive a Dacia, love the color violet.
The couple who work as Teachers borrowed the book "Dame Commissar".
The couple who work as Agriculturalists drive a Moskvic.
Pamela and her husband drive a Renault and brought the book "Grandfather Joseph".
Pamela and her husband borrowed the book that Mr and Mrs Zajac brought.
Robert and his wife like the color yellow and borrowed the book "The Modern Comedy".
Mr and Mrs Swain work as Shoppers.
"The Modern Comedy" was brought by a couple driving a Skoda.

Is it a problem to find out everything about everyone from this information?

Good luck!!!!!! :)

My Favorite Things

2010-04-06T16:50:00.000+02:00

This was one of my favorite song when I was young, and I have it in my iTunes, and I just heard it again, just when I actually feeling down, worried and sad. Well, it do cheer me up and the idea of listing my favorite things came up. :D
First, based on the original song, and.. So.. here we go...........

Morning dew on flowers and leafes and furs on teddy bears
little jewelries and warm woolen mittens
hot chocolates in a cold night
Colorful paper packages tied up with strings and ribbons

Black or white stallion and crisp apple streudels
the sound of piano, harp, and violins, and won ton with noodles
Starry nights

white dresses with blue satin sashes
Snowflakes that stay on my hairs
Silver white winters that melt into springs
Sunny day with cool winds

Cute little children and lots of interesting novels
painting houses with lake and blue skies
hiking with friends and sweet desserts
sitting near fireplace in winter
dancing crazily with friends

go on a ride in a theme park
flying on the back of the horse
solving puzzles and riddles

THOSE ARE A FEW OF MY FAVORITE THINGS
:D

Bored to the max......

2010-04-02T08:13:00.005+02:00

08.20 AM

I am working now... yup I am..
So.... what am I doing now??

Writing my blog.. yeah right..
Why?

Because there's nothing else to do!!!!!!!!
It's public holiday, Easter. Most of the companies in Switzerland would be closed, including the academic of the school. Well.. too bad that my school also provide the accommodation in school, it means that the operation of the school must keep working. And that, including me as a receptionist.

It's just that... there's not much to do. I'm serious. No posts coming, no deliveries, yesterday was the last day of exams and reports for the students, so I'm so sure they went to party crazily last night (it means that they would be dead sleeping until midday) and most of the students are out of the school anyway (since it's holiday, they went traveling abroad).

So.. here I am, sitting behind the reception desk, from 7 AM, with nothing to do (I can't open the document server because of the server error, that means... I can't continue the things that I might be able to do), with no games or chatting allowed and no students to attend to.

I hope the reception-mac will be fixed soon, so I can use it (right now I'm more comfortable with mac rather than PC plus di mac gw punya account sendiri and jg posisinya lebih memungkinkan untuk melakukan hal2 yg ga bersangkut paut dgn kerja haha).

I hope my partner will come soon, coz I have some questions that I need to ask.. .. Our supervisor left us a note of reminders to make sure that we do everything right or not forget about anything because we no, I am alone! And I don't want to make mistakes.. I need the reminder.. but... WHERE DID HE PUT IT???

08.52 AM

Great.. now the school e-mail server is down... I can't open the working e-mail.. The front office program is also down.. How am I supposed to work??

10.53 AM

Ok, Eric took the memo home, and he gave it to me already :) Now I remember what are the things that I could do... It's just that... the server is still down and without the server I can do NOTHING.
Great right? The only things I could do is answering phone calls, give the students their recommended mails and.. .. .. sit nice behind the reception desk and be a nice decoration.

Well, I could pass some time by playing hangman, just found it in igoogle, not great but ok. I just need to wait around 20 more minutes and I could have my lunch break.

Tick Tock Tick Tock Tick Tock......

03.14 PM

At last.... it's working!! And yes, my shift finished at 4 PM. Well... it seems that it's only the email that works though.. the program is not working yet..... OMG.. luckily it's really quiet.. if not.. well... nothing that I can do..

Horse Riding Vs. Dragon Riding

2010-03-24T21:08:00.010+01:00

Yesterday, I just finished the third book if the Inheritance trilogy of Eragon. Honestly, this is one of my favorite book. One of the most interesting part is the bond between the rider and the dragon, how they actually love each other even maybe more than the love of man and woman. How they feel each other as if the other being is part of themselves. It's truly an amazing kind of bond.

Before I started to read the last 2 chapters of Brisingr, I just finished my horse riding session. Then a thought come to me... It's actually not much different with the bonding between a horse and its rider. Well, in some ways at least.

I already thought of a horse as some kind of a dragon before, when a stallion, a big one suddenly held his head out of his room and blocking my way in the corridor, it surprised me. I know that horses could be big, their shoulder is taller than me, and when I say big, it really is means big!! Well, though some could be as small as a dog, such tiny little dwarf horses!!

Well, when only the head and the neck suddenly came up and blocked my way, I really thought and felt as if a dragon's head and neck blocking my way. It really is felt that way.

Then again, in the book it is described that when the dragon and its rider is flying, even though their minds are not connected, they still could feel what the other being is doing. A horse and its rider could do the same. I'm serious, it might seems that I'm exaggerating, but I'm not. A horse is very sensitive and they could feel if their rider is afraid or not, even little body movements of the rider could affect the horse. A horse rider could also feel the horse, when it's moving, even when it just wants to start moving, when the horse is comfortable or afraid.

I have some horse lovers as my friends and I've seen them loving their horses like their own child. They can talk about their horses literally the whole day... (which make people that's not so fond of horses suffers of boring and striving to continue the conversation a lot.. lol) I think it is the same case with the dragon and the riders too :D

Well some people think that horse riding is easy, that the horse is just an animal that you control without depending on the animal's will. Hm... it's totally wrong. Yes, horse rider do control the horse, but the horses also has their own will. When the horse is not cooperating, it is very very difficult to ride them if it's not impossible.
Horse riding is a sport that's not only the human is responsible of winning or losing. If you see the sport, they always announce the name of the horses too, it's always considered that they are partners, not a master and his animal. They often stay with the same partner, very rare that they'll change, usually if the rider change partner it is because of some injuries that will make the partner impossible to be rided.

The same as the rider and the dragon, horse rider and the horse will need a great trust of each other in order to be a great partner. You can see show jumping for example, that trust of their partner has to be very high. Of course, since if you fail during high jumping, it really is could cost the horse rider live and permanent injury for the horse.

For me, horse riding really is like dragon riding in the real world. :D

Kesendirian

2010-03-21T22:03:00.004+01:00

Aku jatuh cinta
padanya yang selalu ada
dikala mereka tak ada

dikala ku suka
dikala ku duka

aku menikmatinya
dikala ia di sana
ditempatku berada

aku membencinya
dikala mereka menyapa
dan ia pun sirna

kumencintainya
lebih dari yang seharusnya

kumenyayanginya
padahal benci kuseharusnya

sunyi ia
walau ia disana

keegoisan cintanya yang membara
mengikat diriku padanya

cemburu ia
mereka merenggutku darinya
mengusirnya
dan ia pun pergi dengan murka

tetap saja
ku jatuh cinta
pada egoisnya
pada diamnya
pada cemburunya
pada murkanya
yang membuat rindu bersuara

12 Years Ago

2010-03-21T21:25:00.000+01:00

“Alaiz! What are you doing? It’s dangerous to sit near the window!”, gasped a woman in her thirties, almost dropping the big basket full of fresh baked breads that she was carrying. She hurried to the little boy’s place, going up the stairs that was located near a big window where the boy sit and gazing outside.

“There’s a big smoke over there mom. It started a few minutes ago”, he pointed to a big grey smoke from one of the buildings about 1 mile away towering to the sky. He just sat calmly, gazing as if a lot of things are crossing his little mind.

“Oh my God, it must be the oil store on the central street…” shock, fear and desperate were all there in her face. Her hands covered her blue eyes along with her sighed before she took Alaiz’s hand in a hurry and dragged him down the big stairs. It was quite a big house with nice furnishings, but certainly old. The paint was fading away and the big living room was simple, very humble for the size.

“Mom, why do they hate us?”, asked the little boy slowly. His mother stopped, she looked at her young son’s blue eyes, and sighed. She went down and hugged him, when she finally released her hug, she tried to say something but nothing came out from her mouth. “Did we do some kind of crimes?”

“No, dear, no, we didn’t do any crimes”, replied her helplessly.
“Then why do they want to harm us?”
The woman sighed again and again, cannot find any words to reply her son’s questions.

There had been news on the street saying that the country was in a bad economical condition. The food prices had gone up steadily, small riots appeared sporadically throughout the country, and now, things had gone to the worst. Alaiz hadn’t gone to school for days now and none of the people had gone out from their home either. Everyone hid in their homes, full with fears.

“Is it a crime to have blue eyes?” he asked again.
When his mother just about to reply, they heard a lot of shouting and swearing from the street, coming near.

“Alaiz, listen to me. You have to hide.” She said with determinations shone from her eyes. “I’ve made these breads for you, hide them with you, you could survive with these for days. If those brown-eyed people broke in, all you must do is hide. Don’t cry, don’t make any sound. No matter what happen, no matter what you heard, don’t come out from you hiding, don’t even try to find me or dad. You hear me? You must stay silent!” Drops of water already on her blue eyes. She hugged him tight and whisper “you must survive”.

Bribery

2010-03-17T20:52:00.003+01:00

Yesterday we came to this topic in our chat, yup "Bribery". This topic is no stranger for me, for I was raised in a country that lives with the slogan of "money could buy everything".

Not only to get illegal things legal, but even to actually get the process of something legal done! Depends on the amount of the bribery, it can goes very very fast or without the bribery, well.. maybe next month if it's not next year...

You can also get various things that's unusual, well for example, VIP room and treatment in jail. It was known to public that if you pay enough, your jail room could be transformed to a spacious luxurious room that your family, friends and business guests could visit anytime they want with TV, telephones, internet, .. basically, anything you want and need.
Well, as long as you have enough money to bribe everyone involves.

Back to the first topic, it came from my Romanian friend, she's writing a report about the events in her country and she came to this event budget that's written literally on it:
Bribery with invoice
Bribery without invoice

..
..
My reaction was WOW!!!!

Ok, it's not a new thing, also in my country to get permission of this and that, there's no other way other than bribing the officers, even though you are eligible to actually do the event without problem, it's just that the officers will find some 'problems' if it's done without bribery. Well, if you want the process gone smoothly, you need some under the table transactions.

It is a common knowledge and secret. That's how the things done. I know even a big international factory that was operating in my country was closed due to the high amount of 'unrecorded expenses'...

Well, usually the bribery expenses are something that's not officially acknowledge, so everyone tries to cover it, so in the accounting section, the bribery money is always written as 'various expenses' or 'unpredicted expenses'. But the way they do in Romania was... just.. WOW.. they literally just write it there, without shame or any acts trying to cover it..

"BRIBERY"

Updates

2010-03-16T12:58:00.002+01:00

Yeah... again.. blog ini terbengkalai untuk sekian waktu...

Well, setelah exam selesai, dan tak ada lagi keharusan untuk belajar, hilang lah juga pelarian dari belajar, blogging, dan terbengkalai pula lah blog ini hahahahahahaha
I'm so honest, am I? :)

Lalu setelah masa liburan yang amat singkat itu, dimulailah masa internshipku di reception, SPA, sports and leisure. Cukup sibuk kadang kadang, lumayan menyenangkan. So far, I enjoyed it much.

Well, I love it much more than the F&B :) hehehe

Di masa masa tanpa internet ini... aku kembali ke my old habit, reading books... yup, aku kembali melahap novel novel, dan urge untuk menulis cerita pun muncul kembali. Begitu banyak jalan cerita yang telah muncul ke benakku, dan seperti biasa, terinspirasi oleh mimpi, tapi tak sempat tertuliskan.. sayang sih rasanya, tapi ya.. kita lihat ya, semoga aku bisa menuliskan beberapa cerita di masa masa kerjaku ini.

Things to do:
save money
reserve a place in Fromagerie
reserve a place in Manege
buy some drinks for the weekend party
find out the phone contract
read more books

Exam: Day 2

2010-01-11T11:05:00.003+01:00

11.05 AM

Yup, I just finished Management Principles Exam!!!!!!!!!
yay!!!!!!!!!!
One down, 2 more to go, go, go, go, go :D

Um.. just as I expected, it's not that hard but the questions are a bit tricky that I'm quite afraid.. I knew that I already made at least 1 mistake, well approximately around 7 mistakes in total (I hope less!!) without the essay.
The essay questions I had predicted, so.. not that hard, but I hope he like my answers lol
Oh well.... 2 more to go....

Yippiiee!!!!
:)

I'm waiting for lunch now, as soon as I have my lunch, I'll have a good sleep!!! (you should see me this morning, I was like trying so hard to be awake, but my whole brain just screaming 'sleep, sleep, sleep..... SLEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPP' yup I was dozing off the whole morning.

Exam: Day 1

2010-01-10T13:07:00.004+01:00

12.45 PM

Again, I always ended up here when I'm supposed to study...
I have Management Principles for tomorrow, Marketing in Service Industry for Tuesday and Human Resource for Wednesday.

Did I study before?? NO.
Am I good in these subjects? Um.. let me think... er... not really, er.. so, that's a.. NO.
Are there a lot to study? OF COURSE!!

So? What am I doing here??? er........................................... running away? yeah right....
I'm not going to study if I don't have the mood anyway, my studying mood will only goes ON at night. It's a gift from God that I'm able to remember my studies in a short time I guess, if not I would have been screwed since long time ago I guess.

Ugh... Gw bener" ga tau mesti ngapain suapaya bisa langsung belajar.. ato supaya bisa lebih niat belajar... bingung deh, susah banget buat bikin nih mood jadi studying mood... >.< style="text-align: center;">----------------------

05.25 PM

Exam pressure is felt everywhere from the third years, as well as report pressure from the BA's. In my room, Francis, Cindy and me were crazy for some times and start giggling and laughing out loud of everything.... after few hours of revising.

When the craziness stop, Francis went back to her 'hot seat', Cindy made a cocoon on the bed and I went to a good, long and warm shower. :D

Just after the shower, I went to the balcony to get some chilling fresh air, yeah... it's winter and -2 C outside just with a shirt and a short (the power of hot shower).. then I heard.....

"O Soooooloooo Mioooooooooo, .. .. .. .." (go on with the lyrics..) a voice of a guy from a balcony somewhere of this school. Loud, clear and proud, though... not really good to hear I must admit. Oh well, it's just another 'crazy' student because of the exam pressure.

Yup, we're not the only ones.....

-------------------------

07.04 PM

"ugh... I sat too long, my back is painful.. Vivienne, do you mind walking in my back?"

"Sure, no problem"

after several moments of walking on the back...

"are you actually having exercise too out of this?"

"yeah... um, well, actually ANYTHING BUT STUDYING"

................................

"can you imagine our room without all of this cupboard?"

"well, it's going to be very empty..."

"yeah, it would be so ugly.. what would that place be I wonder.."

"um.. if we could still have the little table, I guess it would be great to have
more big pillows and just put it there, make it a little living room or something"

"reading corner!!"

"yeah, that would be great!"

"I can imagine reading a good book there with a pot of tea next to me"

"and a plate of cookies and chocolate on the table"

"yeah!! that would be really nice!! I want to have one now.. just relax, read
a good book with tea and cookies"

"isn't it a wrong conversation for a day before the exam?"

"yeah.."

New Year's Story

2010-01-01T13:39:00.004+01:00

*****

She lied on her bed, reading a book. The story that she was reading was so engaging to her that she can't hardly put it down. It's about a lass, younger than she is, that was sacrificed for the sake of her village and to pay the debts of her father.

Then she looked at the clock, it's almost midnight. She remembered, it's almost new year, her friends went to the town to celebrate. She's too lazy t0 go out and prefer to read the book that she started in the evening, and the weather outside was too cold for her. It's in the middle of winter and her health hasn't been that good for a few days, she really don't want to go out and became really sick the next day.

A loud cheer was heard from the town, it must be the crowd celebrating the new year that was almost arrived. She knew in a few minutes she would hear another noise from the fireworks, and she could see them too. Her house is a little bit up in the mountain, in the outskirts of town, the fireworks would be clearly visible from her windows.

She's thinking to get up from the bed and sit near the windows, to see the fireworks. But on the second thought, she has seen the fireworks from year to year, and seeing the fireworks alone would only make her feel lonely, so she decided to stay on her bed and immerse herself in the story again.

Just when her world of imagination started to build, the loud cheer disturbed her again, this time accompanied with the sound of explosions, the fireworks had begun. It's midnight.

She wanted to build the imagination walls again, but the noise keep disturbing her. At last, she gave up. She got up from her bed and walked to the windows. Then she sat down on the floor just by the windows, and watched the fireworks. She still could hear the loud cheers from the town every time the big fireworks came.

As she watched the fireworks, she started to wonder. If she decided to go with her friends, she might have a great time right now, watching the fireworks with a glass of wine or champagne on her hand and cheer with her friends or even making new friends. Or if she hadn't fought with her dear lad 2 weeks before, he might not returned to his homeland and still with her now watching the fireworks with her, together. She suddenly missed him, missing his hugs and kisses.

The fireworks had finished, the loud cheering ceased and so did her thoughts. She got up, and returned to her bed. She picked up the book again, and returned to her world of imaginations.

*****

Merry Christmas ^^

2009-12-24T21:52:00.004+01:00

To: Everyone...

*
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* *
* MERRY CHRISTMAS *
* *
* *
* * * * * * * * * * *
* *
* *
* *

From: Vincentia Vianney V. C. W.

Ps: ini bukti bahwa gw ga ada kerjaan lain di malam Natal

Plus: D#$%, I spent so many minutes to make it, but the blogger erased the form :( It's supposed to be a Christmas Tree!!!!!!!!!!!
A nice, good looking, cute Christmas Tree!!!!!!!!
:(
Oh well, do look and think of it as a Christmas Tree!!!!
:D

Lonely Christmas

2009-12-24T20:12:00.000+01:00

----------------

Today is Christmas Eve..
bur for a person that celebrates it alone, today is just another day..

Yes.. I miss my family far away from here
that I'm so sure they are having a big feast over there like always..

I miss my friends
and I'm sure they are with their family having fun

If I were there, with my family,
I would have no time to sit in front of my laptop
I would wear my best dress
having a gala dinner
chat and taking pictures with my cousins
waiting for midnight,
waiting for the presents to come..

This is the third Christmas in a row that I spent without them
I guess, this is the price that I have to pay
for my pride of independence
going to adulthood

I'm no longer a child
nor a teenager
that live sheltered under the family's wings

Before, I don't hate the idea of living alone
even for the rest of my life
I think I would like that
without any strings that would bind me to things
that I don't really like

But spending such a festive night alone
I start to imagine,
maybe someday
when I have my own familiy
this day would be festive again
just like my childhood days

Yes.. this thought surprised me
I thought I would be fine alone
even when my friend that was living alone told me not to
she told me to find a husband someday
living alone is too lonely
I replied 'well, I could handle it'
but now...
maybe she's right

.......

-------------------------

Me, you, Us...

2009-12-23T01:26:00.002+01:00

we used to be so close
and now that we are apart

is it me?
is it you?
or... is it us?

could it be possibly the winter?
or it might be was just the game?

when we lost it
we lost us too

or is it time to be blame
for not going around like it used to be
for me
for you
for us??

or maybe.. it is true
that I've changed
my world move fast
and yours stand still

it hurts to think
to know what's been lost

when memories are questioned
when we ran out of words
for you
for me
for us??

it's painful to imagine
yet it's keep coming

and now...
the fire's lit,
and what is it that it'll burn?

--------------------------------------

Mules...

2009-12-23T00:59:00.003+01:00

-----

kudengar gemuruh
mengguncang tubuh
hati mengeruh
tubuhku rapuh

perasaanku tak enak
intuisiku tak baik

tak lama lagi
dapat kukatakan
kukan kembali berlari
bersembunyi di ruang kecil

kudengar gemuruh
mengguncang tubuh
hati mengeruh
tubuhku rapuh

yang menghantuiku sejak
siang tadi

-------------

Terinspirasi dari keadaan perut yang sungguh tak enak..
dan didorong oleh rasa sesal telah menghabiskan ice cream itu tadi siang.......
T.T

trying snowboarding

2009-12-21T00:23:00.002+01:00

Yup..
besok.. will be the first time I'll try snow boarding
olahraga yang populer banget di kalangan anak muda swiss
hm...
never tried it before, it's time to try :D
I'm not good with cold.. I know, I do love snow, but I can't stay with them for long
well, I got to try at least once right?
:D

besok is going to be the day..

yah.. walau sebenernya badan ini masih pegel linu gara" horse riding kemaren...
tapi...
semoga semoga semoga besok udah ga pegel" lagi :D

udah siapin kompress panas nih.. buat menghilangkan pegal linu di badan hehehe

waaaa I'm so excited..
though in the same time... nervous, anxious, and afraid
I'm afraid that it's not going to be a pleasant time for me..
I'm afraid that it's going to be too cold or rough for me..

well,
I got to try to find out right?
maybe I'm going to enjoy it
maybe I'm going to love it
who knows....

^^

Holiday

2009-12-18T03:33:00.004+01:00

Akhirnya....
setelah report rally that equals to the hell of my life.....

' 'I'M ON HOLIDAY' '

yup that's right.... :D

Yah.. walaupun ga 100% holiday sih.. berhubung masih ada holiday report dan final exam yang mesti dipersiapkan.... T.T

2 weeks holiday would fly like a tornado T.T

But you know what?? for this moment, I don't care... I'm in a full holiday mood. It's 3.45 AM, my last report just been due, I'm not sleepy at all.. and YES it's officially my holiday!!!!!!!!!

^^

nothing else matter :D

Holiday plan:

snowboarding
horse riding
read novels
go to Lucerne
find an apartment
think slowly again about dslr
managerial accounting report
marketing case study
HR & management principles review
HAVE FUN!!

Hidup liburan!!
Long live holiday!!
God bless the holiday!!!

My lovely fellow school mates....

2009-12-16T21:07:00.003+01:00

I lived in an international campus with high standard of business and formalities. Oh well, that's what officially is.. but in actual real life... There are a bunch of party animals, more than humans in number that actually reside in the same place as I do.

They aren't capable of paying respect at all, others are invincible, the only thing matter is themselves. Rules and regulations are never heard of by them. The only thing in their eyes are alcohol, sex, fun, alcohol, alcohol and oh.. alcohol.

Here's a simple truth and fact about how inconsiderate these people could be, or how.. uncivilized in a simple matter. This is an actual e-mail that I received today from our Operation Director with little editing, for the sake of my own prove of graduation paper....

-------------------------------------------------------------

Ladies and Gentleman

You may know that most of our standard rooms don't have bathroom. For this reason some student have to use the public shower and bathroom available. For the same reason we have shower dedicated to one gender only

Please respect the following knowing that someone caught in a bathroom not for his gender will get deduction point for inappropriate behavior

Public shower & bathroom on FAI 2nd floor: Female

Public shower & bathroom on FAI 3rd floor: Male

Public shower & bathroom on FAI 4th floor: Female in the East wing - Male in the West wing

Public shower & bathroom on FAI 5th floor: Female in the East wing - Male in the West wing

The East wing is room between (550 - 557)

The West wing is room between (436 - 444)

It also has come to our attention that some of you do not understand the use of shower curtains. The shower curtain helps you to avoid having water in the whole bathroom while taking a shower.

Please co-operate and use the bathroom accordingly.

Thank for you attention

Yours sincerely,

Patrick de Quietbus

------------------------------------------------------

Mr Patrick de Quitbus, Director of Operations

----------------------------------------------

repoooooooorrrtttsssssssss

2009-12-14T23:32:00.006+01:00

Guess what happen this week?
Yup... that's right, REPORT-RALLY!!!!
Amazing isn't it??
4 report deadlines in a week... not counting the deadlines from the previous weeks!!
It's very common and predictable to have a or some mental breakdowns, yes it is very reasonable and understandable..
Well, what do you think will happen if you put 2 girls in a room, give 4 deadlines in a week with an effect camera???

Actually there are lots and lots more.. seriously!!!
But... well... er....
Yea, just leave it at that.....

------------------------------------

Okay, the next day.... Here's the update,

1 report is down
second report is almost finished
the third report is unknown, but for sure almost finished
the last report..... I don't want to think about it yet
felt really bad because my camera is DEAD (yeah, ladies and gentleman, it's dead, RIP my lovely camera.... T.T)
got a ticket for a friend's party
really want to do the report, but felt obliged to at least show up

So... I showed up, starting to get ready just 15 minutes before the actual event start, so.. very not prepared for a party actually.. The party is 'SECRET', and it really is, we don't even know where it's going to be!! (well, I knew though, coz I saw the organizers ran back & forth to a certain room lol)

We were blindfolded then was led to the room, it was amazing, honest, it's a big classroom that I just went in the morning, plain big classroom. Guess, I can't even recognize the room if I didn't know before hand... Okay, I would recognize it after a minute, but still it was impressive.

The party at first was just so-so, and they have a table for BlackJack, got $50 chip as initial capital, I knew how to play it, just never tried it before. So, I decided to try, and... it turns out.. I love it. I was losing at first, but then start winning :D

Yay, I could say I was almost staying by the table the whole night. Well the entertainment then became more interesting, plus I'm getting a champagne, that kinda building my party mood in an instant too. The competitions was funny, it's worth cheering and laughing.

So, I was planning to stay there for a while, guess what? 'Nah.... I'll stay till the end, my second report is almost finished anyway." Then, I'm ending in having chips worth $230, well, just chips, no real money involved, but still it was so much fun. And.... I'm getting a lucky draw!!! The first time in my life I got something just for being lucky!!! It's a poker set, and they called me 'Poker Face'. Well, judging I won a poker set and I was by the gambling table more than half of the night.. yeah I guess I deserved it (though it was my first time trying! lol).

Well, at that night, I felt like very very lucky (forgetting about the death of the camera)... Thanks for my 2 luck ladies, my best friends, Cindy and Kiki. :D

---------------------------------------

Butler

2009-12-11T12:50:00.002+01:00

This job always fascinate me , an idea of being a professional personal assistant, or to be more precise, the idea of HAVING one.. lol
Kalo di indo bisa dibilang ini perkerjaan yang sangat mirip dengan pekerjaan Pembantu Rumah Tangga, bedanya, yang ini professional, hanya dimiliki oleh kelas elit dan dibayar tinggi banget. Pernah juga sih kepikiran untuk mencoba pekerjaan ini, kan otomatis kerjaannya bareng kelas elit melulu, lumayan buat bangun koneksi untuk masa depan, sekaligus siapa tau bisa kenalan sama millioner single muda yang cakep, asyik!!!! hahahahaha *mimpi dan bercanda abiz*
Tadi pagi internship office kirim e-mail pengumuman, ada yang nyari butler service dari skolah gw.. hm... saat dibaca.. oke asyik juga, liat bayarannya... wow.. menggiurkan!! Sayang saya sudah punya internship job dan juga memang tidak memenuhi kualifikasinya hahahahaha.

Berikut ini e-mail dari si ibu dari kontor internship:

-----------------------------------------------------------------

JOB DESCRIPTION

An international business man is hiring a personal assistant/chef who will be in charge of cooking and serving meals for himself and his guests in the following locations: New York (50% of time), Switzerland and Hong Kong (the other 50% of the time). He or she will need to cook vegetarian, continental, asian and indian cuisine. A one month training on “House Recipes” is planned at start of the job. The client is tired of eating in restaurants and would like some excellent home cooked meals.

He or she is going to travel alone in advance in order to prepare the accommodations for the business man. He will also be in charge of other additional administration and house services.

The ideal candidate must fluently speak English, knowledge of French is plus. He will need to demonstrate outstanding cooking and serving skills, an exceptional sense of hospitality, be passionate for perfection, have good education, discrete and fully reliable.

He or she must be able to work independently, with total availability and flexibility. He or she will check and report all expenses for traveling, food & beverage and house expenses.

He or she must have an international driving licence, and be Swiss, European, US, CAN or Hong Kong (HKSAR) nationality. Lodging facilities can be provided in Hong Kong, but the candidate can also be living on his own in New York or Switzerland as well.

He or she must have technical skills for emails, correspondence and administrative tasks.

Annual salary: 50’000-65’000 US$.

If you are the person that they're looking for please send me your CV, copies of certificates, driving license and motivation letter. Only serious and qualified candidates files will be forwarded.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

The Objective and Operational Plan of My Life

2009-12-10T08:50:00.006+01:00

Objective:

Become an owner of an event company worth CHF 35000 by the age of 30

Operational plan:

Short term:

finished third year by January 2010
Do my third internship as receptionist/SPA at SHMS at the end of January-July 2010
Save CHF 1000 during the internship
Back to my home country on August 2010
Do my BA term in SHMS from September 2010-March 2011
Do managerial training in a five star Hotel 2011-2012
Save CHF 2000 during the managerial training

Long term:

2012 - 2016 work in at least 3 star hotel that relates to events
Save CHF 40000 during the work in hotel
2016-2019 work in an event company
Save CHF 36000 during work in event company
2019 started my own event company with the asset worth CHF 35000

Note:
Plans and objective could be revised and updated anytime without any prior notice.

Ps: Believe it or not, this is a task for Managerial Accounting in my university, and we have to present it!!!!!! Exciting isn't it?
(reading instruction: with a sarcastic intonation)

School Interview

2009-11-23T17:18:00.002+01:00

wow... so much had happen in the past few days....

Ada phone interview disneyland Paris hari Jumat, trus ada Omar's Banquet on Saturday, trus Reception/SPA interview tadi siang... dan email yang baru saja gw terima, I got the job on Reception/SPA in my school!!

Mumpung masih fresh, mau tau kronologis interviewnya?

13.45

Dapet break dari kelas Logistic & Events yang terletak di lantai 6, dan tersadarlah gw, 'Oh My God, bentar lagi gw interview!!!'. Turunlah gw ke lantai 3 tempat SEG office berada dan itu adalah ruangan yang akan menjadi ruangan interview gw. Gw intip ke dalem, kosong. Gw liat ke sekeliling, ga ada tanda-tanda orang yang akan menginterview gw. Eits... siapa mereka? Gw ga tau... Nah lo..
Pasalnya, gw juga ga ng-apply nih internship, gw emang tertarik sama internship ini, tapi rencananya buat taon depan. Para receptionist yang kerja di sekolah emang udah kenal ama gw gara-gara gw kerja di sekolah taon pertama dulu, jadilah kita lumayan akrab, dan jadilah juga nama gw ini dimasukin ke dalem list walaupun gw ga apply. Berhubung gw blom dapet internship, waktu gw dapet email interview, 'why not? toh ga ada ruginya'. hehe
"Are you waiting for the interview?" tanya seseorang di belakang gw, buyar deh lamunan gw. Dia salah satu receptionist di sekolah gw, dia emang baik banget, tapi jujur, gw ga tau nama dia siapa, dan cuma dia seorang yang namanya gw ga tau. And yang pasti, ga mungkin dong gw nanya.... taroh di mana nih muka. Ntar gw pasti tau kok nama dia siapa. :D
"Yes"
"It's at 2 right? It's still 10 minutes. Don't be nervous, it's ok."
"Yeah... and oh ya, do you know who's going to give the interview?"
"It's going to be me.... Sonia.. and Sepibus. It's going to be ok, no worries"
"Ok. Thanks"
Oooo.. gw dah ga terlalu gugup deh klo gitu. Sonia juga receptionist dan dia temen gw, kita sama-sama pecinta horse riding. Sepibus.. nah ini orang salah satu managerial tingkat atas, jadi gw ga pernah ngobrol-ngobrol ma dia. Wew.. 3 orang sekali interview....

14.00

Ada temen gw dateng, gw liat di list, dia bakal interview sesudah gw. Kita mengobrollah, dia pun gugup ga tau mau ntar mau jawab apa klo ditanya macem-macem. Ya gw bantu aja cari jawaban buat dia. Nah, akhirnya para interviewer mulai masuk ruangan, tapi kita masih blom dipanggil nih... bingung. Eh, masuklah satu lagi, perawat sekolah merangkap manager SPA&leisure, gw kenal sih, biasanya kita bisa ngobrol, tapi 2 hari yang lalu pas ketemu dia kayaknya rada jengkel karena gw ga apply tapi kok dipanggil... Jadi.. agak takut gitu dengan kehadiran dia. Oke.. 4 orang di dalem.. hm.. mulai agak gugup juga nih, tapi masih blom juga dipanggil.....

14.10

Satu lagi orang managerial tingkat tinggi, salah satu orang yang ga bisa diajak ngomong dengan mudah, masuk..... Wadaw... 5 orang!!!!! Gw ama temen gw langsung panas dingin.. 'ini interview apaan sih? Cuma internship doang kan??? Internship receptionist/SPA doang kan... bukan managerial position??? Kok banyak banget orang di dalem!!!'. Lalu keluarlah si manager yang paling terakhir masuk tadi, manggil gw.... 'OMG'.... dan masuklah gw ke dalam ruangan yang auranya sangat mengintimidasikan itu.
Okay.. mereka semuanya tersenyum dengan ramah, dan mulai hilanglah rasa nervousku. Dan ternyata, tu orang yang tadi manggil gw keluar ruangan. 'Amiiin, ternyata cuma 4, ya walaupun masih banyak sih, tapi lumayan daripada 5'. Dan dimulailah interviewku..

"Explain to us who are you"
"Do you know what kind of activities that you can have in Leysin?"
"Are you confident if you have to lead students to a place that you have never been before?"
"What will you do if the students missing?"
"Do you like sports? What kind of sports that you do?"
"If you have to walk alone late at night, are you scared?"
"What is it that will make us choose you and not anyone else?"

Nah pertanyaan terakhir ini dia yang paling susah dijawab, gw butuh diam dulu untuk mikir sejenak.. lalu.. Mulailah daku dengan "ya.. daku sudah kenal lingkungan sekolah, sudah tau anak-anaknya kayak apa, lalu juga setelah semester selesai, datanglah para anak-anak kecil.. and... 'it's going to be fun'". Lalu mereka pun tertawa semua. Well, kata-kata 'it's going to be fun' itu dalam majas ironis, kan ga mungkin dong kalo gw bilang 'mereka sangat menyebalkan' walaupun gw yakin mereka juga sependapat ama gw.
Semester Febuari tuh akan selesai bulan Mei, dan semester selanjutnya dimulai bulan September. Dan tentunya sekolah gw yang amat sangat bisnis type ini tidak akan membiarkan propertinya diam tanpa menhasilkan uang, maka diciptakanlah program Summer Camp untuk anak-anak Eropa belajar Inggris dan Prancis. Perlu diketahui, anak-anak ini sungguh diluar kendali, tak punya sopan santun, berlagak sangat dewasa, arogan, super duper nakal.. (kalo dilanjutin ga akan selesai). They really live up to their nickname given by the whole school staff, 'little devils/little bastards'.
Gw yakin banget tuh para orang tua happy banget ada program kayak gini, mereka jadinya bisa lepas dari anak-anak mereka yang nakal-nakal itu selama 3 minggu penuh!!!!

Short and long, interview gw selesai. Satu stengah jam berikutnya, gw dapet email yang memberitahukan bahwa gw diterima!!! hahahahahahaha.

Guru Akutansiku

2009-11-19T16:40:00.003+01:00

Tahukah anda bahwa aku sedang membenci seseorang... IA adalah seorang wanita yang baru saya kenal beberapa bulan. Beberapa bulan ini saya menghormatinya, dan saya menyesalinya. IA bukan orang yang patut mendapatkan rasa hormat itu. IA hanya seorang wanita yang berpikiran dengan logika numerologis yang dibutakan oleh emosi.

Emosinya yang sungguh tinggi itu, sering meledak-ledak dan merendahkan orang lain dengan gaya dan cara sinisnya. Tentu saja, tak sedikit orang yang mulai menghindarinya, tak lagi bicara padanya, dan pastinya kehilangan antusias untuk mendengar kata-katanya.

Berkali-kali IA berteriak nyaring melengkin-lengking dengan kasar di depan kami. Kami menghormatinya dan diam. Saat IA menyindir dengan sinisnya yang membuat kami merasa bodoh, kami hanya menghela nafas, 'roll the eyes' dan diam. Saat IA memberi tugas untuk membaca 1 bab penuh jam 9 malam untuk sebelum kelas jam 8 pagi keesokan harinya, kami hanya diam. Disaat teman-temanku muak padanya dan tak mau mengerjakan tugas yang IA berikan, aku dan ke-empat temanku tetap mengerjakannya, empat dari puluhan murid yang lain dan IA sungguh marah. Saat itu IA bagaikan seekor naga murka yang bernafaskan api.

Di kelas lain... tiba-tiba ia lebih sabar.. Ia walau tetap menyindir, tetapi memberi penjelasan lebih lanjut. IA memberi informasi dan waktu yang lebih pada mereka. Mereka yang tak satupun mengerjakan tugas, ditolerir olehnya.

Dan tetap, aku menghormatinya, tapi hanya sampai tadi pagi...

Tadi pagi, aku mendapatkan hasil dari semua jerih payahku. Tak pernah sekalipun dalam hidupku aku gagal untuk mencapai apa yang harus dicapai, apalagi dalam bidang yang IA kini menjadi dewanya. Untuk pertama kalinya dalam sejarah hidupku, aku gagal. Pernahkan terbesit dalam benakku bahwa aku akan gagal? Tidak! Aku bahkan tak ragu untuk hal itu. Ternyata, tak hanya aku, begitu pula teman-temanku, semuanya gagal.

Tetapi mereka yang di kelas lain, sedikit yang gagal. Bahkan mereka yang tak mengerti pun dapat lulus dengan hasil yang memuaskan.

Lalu.. dapatkah kuterima bahwa keputusan IA yang kini menjadi dewa, adil?? Tidak! dan hilanglah pula semua rasa hormat yang kumiliki sebelumnya padanya. IA menilai dan dibutakan dengan emosi. IA menjadi subjektif dengan angka-angkanya.

Saat dengan halus kubertanya apakah yang kurang, sehingga aku dapat memperbaikinya untuk langkah selanjutnya.. IA dengan angkuhnya berkata 'Semuanya Salah', analisis-analisisnya, kesangkut-pautan angka-angkanya, urutan kata-katanya, semuanya salah. IA bahkan tak ambil pusing untuk bertanya yang mana karyaku dari sekian banyak karya-karya yang lain, dengan yakinnya IA berkata demikian.

Maka habis pula lah rasa masa kebodohanku padanya, dari petunjuk-petunjuk yang IA berikan, dengan yakin telah aku dan teman-temanku curahkan pada karya kami. Jelaslah, IA, tidak tahu yang mana karya kami, atau bahkan, munkin saja IA bahkan tidak perlu membaca untuk menilai karya-karya kami, cukup dari emosinya saja.

Dari masa bodoh, aku pun mulai membencinya. IA yang tidak bertindak adil dan hanya dipenuhi oleh dirinya sendiri, keegoisannya, dan kepuasan batinnya. Aku pun tak lagi berharap untuk kebahagiaannya.

Untitled

2009-11-17T09:34:00.004+01:00

Saat ini aku sedang merasakan yang namanya kemunduran dalam sosialisasi. saat dimana teman- teman yang tadinya aku percaya, kini tak lagi dapat kupercaya. Walau perubahan ini tak ditunjukkan secara terang-terangan, but please.. do you think I'm that stupid? Jangan pikir karena mereka berbicara dengan bahasa yang tak dapat kumengerti dan aku akan have no clue at all?? Pernahkah mereka dengar dengan yang namanya body language? It's universal. Dari nada bicara dan gerak gerik tentu orang akan mengerti.

Dengan senyum-senyum palsu mereka aku berasa seperti dipergunakan. Disayang-sayang saat dibutuhkan, dan saat tak dibutuhkan, dibuang diam-diam. Capek rasanya berpura-pura tidak tahu. Untuk terang-terangan berkata 'Aku tahu!!'... jujur, aku tak sanggup, aku tak sanggup menyakiti hubungan yang masih ada diantara kami, bagaimanapun, mereka orang-orang yang pernah kuhargai keberadaannya dalam hidupku.

Kadang aku bingung bagaimana cara menghadapinya...
Ku tak mau terlalu dekat dengan mereka, walau tak terbakar, tapi terlalu dekat dengan api juga sengsara karena radiasi panasnya.
Untuk menjauh pun, tetap saja tak bisa terlalu jauh, bagaimana pun juga, kehangatan harus tetap di jaga.......

we don't need a hero

2009-11-15T16:34:00.002+01:00

I was just about to do my facilities design when this topic occurs to me....
like usual, I'll do anything to distract me from the actual things that I need to do lol.. but I will still do it anyway in the end, because I have to.
anyway, here we go,

Why do they want to be our hero?
it's not the only thing that will make us value them

even though if it's true,
but becoming our superman doesn't mean literally to be able to fly
or lift a car with a hand
nor that they have to save our life
from a life-death situation
do you know how small the percentage would be
if they want to be able to do that??

to be our hero is enough just to be there
they don't have to solve anything
just being there to listen and support us,
it's all that we need
how long will it take for them to realize this??

we don't need a superman
nor a spiderman
we could go paragliding if we want to fly
mountain climbing if we want to climb high things
what use will we got for laser eyes?

we don't need a hero
we need companions
a person to get through the day
and share the tears and joys

---------

Kosong

2009-11-15T12:59:00.002+01:00

Apakah kalian pernah merasakan hidup yang hampa?
inilah yang kurasakan sekarang, dan ini bukan untuk yang pertama kalinya.

Aneh kalau untuk dipikir, apakah aku tak punya kerjaan? Salah, malah sebaliknya, aku punya banyak in my to-do-list.
Apakah aku kesepian? Mungkin, tapi jujur, aku punya rumet yang baik, teman kelompok yang selalu bareng,.. tapi...... entah mengapa terkadang aku lebih memilih melewatkan waktu bersama kesendirian dibandingkan dengan mereka. Aku lebih suka sendiri.
Apakah soal cinta? Memang, aku tak punya someone special, tapi aku tau di dunia ini ada orang-orang yang mencintaiku dan aku pun mencintai mereka (baca: keluarga dan teman-teman red.).

Apakah aku melakukan hal-hal yang kusukai? Ya, aku pergi menunggang kuda setiap kali kupunya waktu, dan jujur, kegiatan ini sangat menyenangkan dan mampu membuatku lupa akan segala masalah untuk sesaat. Secercah warna di bingkai hitam-putihku.

Entah apa yang hilang dari hidupku ini? Mungkinkah teman sejati? Secara teman sejatiku saat ini semuanya terletak diseberang gunung dan lautan. Teman-temanku di sini... memang mereka baik.. tapi.. tetap saja tak dapat me-replace mereka ataupun mendekati ikatan persahabatan yang kumiliki dengan teman-teman semasa di kampung halaman dulu. Mungkin saja karena budaya dan back ground yang beda, atau karena bahasa yag tak sama sehingga menjadi penghalang yang sangat besar.

Jujur, mungkin aku merindukan sosok someone special, ya mungkin saja. Tapi jujur juga, di tempatku sekarang berada, tak ada calon yang dapat memasuki hati ini. Kalau dibayangkan untuk bersama dengan salah satu dari mereka... rasanya hidup sendiri jauh lebih baik, hehehe.

Ataukah... aku merindukan kegiatan-kegiatan sosial tanggung jawab yang dulu kumiliki dan tak tersedia kegiatan seperti itu di sini? Tak ada OSIS atau GITA, ataupun english debating club. Di sini tak tersedia kegiatan seperti itu. Memang di sini ada student forum ambassador yang seperti OSIS, tapi... SAF ini hampir tak ada gunanya, mereka tak menyelenggaraka event apa pun, tak juga berfungsi dengan sebagaimana mestinya, menyuarakan suara-suara murid. Badan organisasi ini hanya sekadar nama, karena itulah aku pun malas untuk bergabung.

Hm.... ada banyak kemungkinannya....
tapi tak diketahui yang mana yang jadi alasan sebenarnya...

for a person that I know

2009-11-14T15:55:00.002+01:00

I am tired of wondering over and over

Do you remain silent because you are ill?

Do you stop talking because your heart is broken?

Do you look sad because you are sick of me?

Do you hate talking to me?

Do you enjoy the gap between us?

Do you think what I am wondering about you?

Do you feel the same thing as I do?

Lonely

I want to drive the loneliness away

But you never want to let it go

You keep it besides you for every seconds

I want to replace the loneliness

But it seems you love it more than you love me

by: Fen

This poem is made by my friend, I read it, and just perfectly describe what I felt...

Senyum Palsu

2009-11-12T16:18:00.002+01:00

dalam hampa
ku bersila

ditemani sepi
disebelah sunyi

mereka berbisik nyaring
suara suara yang asing
dengan nada yang berdenging

mereka ramai
ku tak damai

hati ini kosong
hidup pun melompong

mereka berbisik nyaring
suara suara yang asing
dengan nada yang berdenging

kita tak satu
terpisah pagar batu
senyum yang palsu

mereka menatap
ku meratap

sesalilah
bila ku tak sama
kita bersama
jiwaku berkelana

mereka berbisik nyaring
suara suara yang asing
dengan nada yang berdenging

kumerindu
pada waktu
ingin kupeluk
saat dulu

saat surya
menyapa
dalam ria
kita berkisah

tiada
mereka berbisik nyaring
suara suara yang asing
dengan nada yang berdenging

_._._._._._._._._._._._

temaaaaaannnnnn aku kangeeeeeeennnn >.<

Update

2009-10-12T08:56:00.002+02:00

udah lama nih.. ga update...
saatnya update deh hehehehe

Aku yang sekarang udah mulai kuliah lagi, in fact udah mau setengah semester lewat... How is it my third year life? Well, it is exciting, full of reports (just like what my previous predecessors complaint about), busy and above all, I'm enjoying it :)

Kalo mo diliat jumlah reports.. emang banyak banget.. susah?? lumayan.. tapi kalo mau jujur, gw jauh lebih pilih seandainya report" ini individual report daripada group report. hm.. gimana ya... I don't really like group reports... bukannya sombong, tapi aku lebih puas kalo ngerjain sendiri. Semua topik and decision, aku sendiri yang buat, puas tidaknya, aku yang tentuin. Group report gini agak susah, mau buat begini konsultasi dulu, yang lain mikirnya apa aku mikirnya apa. Aku mau begini, mereka ga setuju dan mau begitu, pusing jadinya.. Kadang-kadang kesel juga. Walau teman akrab pun bakal jadi belang kalo sudah begini.

Apa aku masih horse riding?
yup ^^. dan aku enjoy banget horse riding.. at least there's one activity that I could be just myself and far from those reports and projects :)

How about aikido and shinkendo??
:( it's really too bad that I couldn't find a place for me to continue that, nor the time to be honest. The nearest place that I found is in Montreux. Tapi dari sini ke Montreux one way udah mau sejam... Blom lagi biaya transport... hm.... mikir" juga jadinya.

Lalu... apakah ada orang yang berkesan?
Hm... di sekolah ini tetap saja seperti dulu. Ada sih yang berkesan... tapi udah unavailble ato ada trait negative lainnya yang jadi penghalang besar.

oke, times up.. saatnya kembali ke kelas Mr. Greven hehehe :)

Foggy Day

2009-09-13T13:33:00.003+02:00

I sit alone
outside my room

see nothing but fog
with my feeling clogged

I live among the clouds
high above the crowds

saying my prays
to cease this sky of grey

for the tears I shed
and the laughter I shared

not to stop dreaming yet
happy ends for romeo and juliette

but it is hard
to chase away doubt

when it's easier to let you leave
rather than to deceive

this love is greed
made my heart bleed

and this cold breeze
made this feeling freeze

should I hold on
or moving on?

Meresah

2009-08-01T18:05:00.003+02:00

gara" Dyah nih...
bikin semangat untuk buat puisi hihihihihihi

gundah
resah

tak lagi cerah duniaku
matahariku
berlayar menjauh

ia masih di sana
tapi hangatnya tak terasa

tahukah kamu?
rasa nyeri menunggu
sekiranya bertemu
aku masih ragu

hati ini retak
tapi masih berbunga

apakah anda
merasa sama?
rasa berseri
dan perih?

atau
hanya aku
yang tersipu
dan tertipu?

Game Lovers

2009-07-30T19:54:00.003+02:00

we're just a couple of ordinary people
that lives in an unusual world

a real, mixed with imaginary world
we meet each day
we talk each time
we share tears and joy
the bond is born

we know it's not real
and it won't last either

stupid as it might be
as unreal as it is
but we keep going anyway

reasons start to speak
we both realize it
but again
we close our eyes
and start to play

we're just a couple of stupid people
that lost in a game

last day of work

2009-07-12T12:48:00.002+02:00

today is my last day of work..
yes it is....

On Tuesday I'll go to Barcelona already!!! ^^
I'm so happy... but.....
..
..
..
..
..
..

I know that I need to pack..
I know that I need to prepare..
but honestly.. I have no interest to pack ( I hate packing ), I tried, but I don't even know where to start!!!!
>.<

I have to pack
I have to pack
I have to pack

I'm going to pack
I'm going to pack
I'm going to pack.... lol

things to do:
PACKING!!!
print tickets out
buy another box for packing
swiss army knife
swarovski
laundry

Counting down

2009-06-12T16:00:00.002+02:00

Apakah yang sangat kunanti-nantikan saat ini???

Jawabannya adalah the end of my internship!!!!!!!
^^

not that I don't like my internship, I enjoyed it really. It's just that I want to have my holiday soon!!!! ^^
Mulailah aku meng-count down... 1 month 2 days...

Where I'm going to go?
Barcelona for 2 days, Rome for 3 days, Volterra (just visit), and Florence for 2 days.
^^
These are the places that I haven't been there yet, and now... I'm going to get the experience!
Akhirnya setelah sekian lama ingin pergi ke Vatican, datang juga kesempatan ini.

Tiketku sudah di-booking semua, untuk akomodasi.. hanya tinggal Florence yang harus ditentukan. Train, mungkin bisa kita beli pas harinya.
waaaaa, I'm so excited ^^
Ini akan jadi pengalaman pertama kalinya aku jalan" ke luar negeri dengan teman >.< (well, swiss tidak dihitung ya, berhubung ini sudah menjadi negara tempat tinggalku. hehehe). Dan ini juga akan jadi liburan mandiri terpanjang yang sejauh ini, 1 minggu.
^^

Every sun rise that has come
greet me with a smile every morning
telling me you're nearer to your holiday
by one day
^^

Though I still need to pack all of my things!!
Soalnya kan dengan selesainya internship ini, aku pun juga harus pindah, maka semua barang-barangku yang sudah menggunung ini harus di pack rapi dan disimpan. >.<
Malasnyaaaaaaa......
hehehe

And one more thing, guss what I'm addicted to right now?
something that I never though that I'm going to enjoy it this much!!!!

online game!!!!!!!!
lol
yup, it's pirate of the caribbean online!!
lol
my mom is going to be very angry if she knows though lol....

Love Story

2009-06-09T15:10:00.002+02:00

This is my favorite songs right now..
I've been singing these songs since the first time I heard them, just can't get them out of my head lol

the first one is Love Story,
Maybe it's also because of the video that really beautiful that really captures my imagination..
The story of a girl that met her love in a first sight and remember their past life..

It's going to be really wonderful if you could met someone that you'll know just in that second that it's the person you meant to be with....
such a girl imagination lol ^^

Love Story

By: Taylor Swift

We were both young when I first saw you.
I close my eyes and the flashback starts:
I'm standing there on a balcony in summer air.

See the lights, see the party, the ball gowns.
See you make your way through the crowd
and say hello;

Little did I know
That you were Romeo; you were throwing pebbles,
And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet."
And I was crying on the staircase,
begging you, 'Please, don't go.'"

And I said,
"Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone.
I'll be waiting; all there's left to do is run.
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story - baby just say 'Yes.'"

So I sneak out to the garden to see you.
We keep quiet 'cause we're dead if they knew.
So close your eyes; escape this town for a little while.
'Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter,
And my daddy said "Stay away from Juliet,"
But you were everything to me; I was begging you, 'Please, don't go,'"

And I said,
"Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone.
I'll be waiting; all there's left to do is run.
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story - baby just say 'Yes.'

Romeo save me - they're tryin' to tell me how to feel;
This love is difficult, but it's real.
Don't be afraid; we'll make it out of this mess.
It's a love story - baby just say "Yes.'"

Oh.

I got tired of waiting,
Wondering if you were ever comin' around.
My faith in you was fading
When I met you on the outskirts of town,

And I said,
"Romeo save me - I've been feeling so alone.
I keep waiting for you but you never come.
Is this in thy head? I don't know what to think-"

He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring and said,
"Marry me, Juliet - you'll never have to be alone.
I love you and that's all I really know.
I talked to your dad - go pick out a white dress;
It's a love story - baby just say 'Yes.'"

Oh, oh.

We were both young when I first saw you...

The second one is You Belong With Me,
still the same singer, the same type of music

You Belong With Me

You're on the phone with your girlfriend, she's upset
She's going off about something that you said
'Cause she doesn't get your humor like I do

I'm in the room, it's a typical Tuesday night
I'm listening to the kind of music she doesn't like
And she'll never know your story like I do

But she wears short skirts, I wear T-shirts
She's Cheer Captain and I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
That what you're looking for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You belong with me, you belong with me

Walking the streets with you and your worn-out jeans
I can't help thinking this is how it ought to be
Laughing on a park bench, thinking to myself
Hey, isn't this easy?

And you've got a smile that could light up this whole town
I haven't seen it in a while since she brought you down
You say you're fine, I know you better than that
Hey, what ya doing with a girl like that?

She wears high heels, I wear sneakers
She's Cheer Captain and I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
That what you're looking for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You belong with me

Standing by and waiting at your back door
All this time how could you not know?
Baby, you belong with me, you belong with me

Oh, I remember you driving to my house in the middle of the night
I'm the one who makes you laugh when you know you're 'bout to cry
And I know your favorite songs and you tell me 'bout your dreams
Think I know where you belong, think I know it's with me

Can't you see that I'm the one who understands you?
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You belong with me

Standing by and waiting at your back door
All this time, how could you not know?
Baby, you belong with me, you belong with me

You belong with me
Have you ever thought just maybe
You belong with me?
You belong with me

Life goes on...

2009-06-04T23:21:00.002+02:00

Hidup itu berjalan seiring dengan waktu, begitu cepat, dan tak terbayangkan.

Oke, saat ini aku sedang berada jauh di negeri orang, menjalani internship sebagai seorang waiter di sebuah restoran Asia. Tinggal di sini sudah bukan sebuah keanehan bagiku. Pergi kesana kemari menggunakan transportasi umum yang nyaman dan aman walau rumit tapi bukan merupakan sebuah masalah lagi. Dengan biasanya aku bisa pergi ke mesin otomatis dengan layar touch-screennya yang dilengkapi dengan bahasa Jerman, Prancis, Itali dan Inggris.

Kesana kemari mendengar orang disekelilingku berbahasa asing, yang juga biasa saja bagiku. Walau aku tak mengerti apa pun yang mereka ocehkan dalam bahasa Jerman, atau pun saat mereka mencoba berkomunikasi dengan bahasa Inggris mereka yang pas-pasan, aku tak masalah.

Aku pun baru sadar.....
5 tahun yang lalu.. saat aku baru mulai masuk SMA, tak terpikir sedikit pun aku akan tinggal di negara yang saat ini resmi menjadi tempatku berdomisili. Bahasa Perancis, Jerman dan Itali sama sekali tak kumengerti. Tinggal dan hidup di sini, sama sekali tak kusangka. Kalau aku dulu ditanya mungkin jawabanku akan 'ga mungkin'.

Tiba-tiba saja saat aku kelas 3 SMA, setelah perdebatan panjang yang ga kelar-kelar soal jurusan kuliah dengan orang tua, yang jurusannya diubah entah berapa kali, mulai dari computer engineering, aviation, interior design, psychology, medecine, hospitality, culinary, chinese, event management, sampai akhirnya Hospitality and Event Management. Yang letak kuliahnya mulai dari kampung halamanku, Palembang, Sydney, Melbourne, USA, London, dan akhirnya nyasar ke Switzerland. Biasa, mau daku sebagai anak, ga selalu sama dengan harapan dan kemauan orang tua terutama nyokap. Setelah proses negosiasi dan gonta-ganti jurusan yang memakan waktu berbulan-bulan, sampailah pada sebuah kesepakatan gabungan antara kemauan si anak dan sang ibu, Hospitality and Event Management. (hospitality dari sang ibu, event management dari si anak)

Awalnya, apakah ada rencana ke sini? TIDAK SAMA SEKALI.
Dan tiba-tiba saja, formulir pendaftaran diisi dan dikirim, uang kuliah pun ditransfer, dan akhirnya aku pun berangkat ke negeri keju ini. Ke negeri orang yang begitu jauh, tanpa teman atau kenalan, dengan pergaulan yang aku masih tidak tau secara jelas, banyak yang bilang aku berani dan hebat, tapi kalau menurutku, aku cuma NEKAT.

Tidak mau kuliah di negeri sendiri yang mutunya dipertanyakan. Tidak mau juga tinggal bersama orang tua yang membuat diriku terkekang, aku ingin belajar mandiri. Ingin rasanya mencicipi bagaimana rasanya tinggal di negara maju yang kalau melanggar peraturan memang beresiko berat kena hukuman berat, tidak seperti di kampung halaman yang asal menyogok pihak berwajib, semuanya beres, atau yang hukuman pidana pemerkosa dan pembuhuh hanya beberapa bulan penjara, lebih ringan daripada hukuman orang maling ayam.

Kita hanya menjalani hidup ini seperti mengikuti aliran air, kadang tenang, kadang bergejolak dengan arusnya yang deras, kadang melewati sungai yang luas, kadang masuk ke sungai kecil. Kita tidak tahu akan sampai di mana, atau akan bagaimana.

Dulu, tinggal di sini rasanya tidak mungkin, negara tujuanku dulu itu antara USA, Singapore atau Australia. Aku sekarang di mana?
Dulu, kerja sebagai waiter restoran??? Ga mungkin kali ya... Tapi sekarang, pekerjaanku apa?
Dulu, horse riding itu hanya khayalan belaka. Sekarang?
Dulu, belajar bela diri itu juga hanya seperti film dan komik. Tapi aku baru aja pulang dari tempat latihan Aikido-ku.
Dulu, sekolah perhotelan? Wah, ga tertarik tuh....
Dulu...
Dulu..
Dulu.
Dulu

Life goes on..
you'll never know where you're going to be
what you're going to be
just suddenly, you are what you are
could be positive or negative
could be someone you wanted to be, or the contrary
but you know what?
life goes on

Pandora Box

2009-05-29T23:05:00.002+02:00

I saw a box
shining brightly
full of colors

so attractive
that my heart start to yearn for it

what box is it?
I do not know
will it be opened for me?
that's a mystery

whose box is it?
it's a secret
how could I obtain it?
I have no idea

what's inside..
puzzles me
will it be nice?
will it be bad?

will it be full?
will it be empty?

in the midst of know nothingness
I still years for it
dreaming of having it in my arms
..

such a box
a pandora box

secercah warna dalam bingkai hitam putih

2009-05-27T00:17:00.002+02:00

kemarin...
hari pertama aku diperbolehkan bergabung dengan yang lain di tempet Aikido ^^.
Maklum, berhubung aku pemula dan baru mulai, selama ini aku belajar sendirian dengan personal mentor, dan baru kemarinlah aku mulai belajar dengan yang lain. Yang artinya juga aku telah lulus setidaknya pelajaran dasar. hehehe

Senang?
pastinya
Gugup?
sebelumnya iya juga, takut kalo ternyata aku gagal dan kembali diungsikan sendiri. hahaha

Kemarin, sparing partner-ku seorang cewek yang sudah belajar aikido 3 atau 4 tahun.. dia sudah pakai hakama, yang artinya sudah lumayan master, dan satu hal lagi... dia cantik banget.

Capek?
wah... sangat.. apalagi sekarang swiss sudah memasuki musim panas, gila, panasnya sudah tidak kalah dengan Indonesia, malah mataharinya lebih menyengat rasanya.

Setelah latihan yang melelahkan ditambah dengan suhu yang kian meninggi, apalah yang bisa mengalahkan kenikmatan 'shower'... Enak banget rasanya waktu mandi!!!! XD

Saat berjalan pulang, sekitar 500-600 meter yang harus ditempuh demi mencapai halte, ada seekor anjing besar yang tiba-tiba menggonggong dan lari dengan kencang ke arah kita. Aku terdiam, aku memang jatuh cinta dengan binatang spesies satu ini, tapi tetap saja, saat mereka menyalak dan berlari kearahku.............. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. Aku takut! Aku tak berani bergerak, takut bila aku salah bergerak, dan menyebabkan akibat yang buruk. Apalagi saat itu aku berjalan dibagian depan rombongan. Seakan anjing itu berlari dan siap menyerangku. Untung saja pemiliknya yang berada di belakang anjing itu berteriak, memanggil namanya, si anjing pun diam dan berhenti.
Barulah kusadari, ada seseorang yang telah maju dari belakang dan berdiri di depanku. Aku baru sadar, aku terlindungi.
Sebuah perasaan yang timbul dengan tiba-tiba, dan membuatku kaget. Ini pertama kalinya setelah sekian lama aku merasa terlindungi. Kapan ya terakhir kali aku merasa dilindungi???? 3 tahun atau 4 tahun yang lalu??

Selama ini rasanya aku memang ingin mandiri, tidak mau bertumpu pada orang lain, dan aku merasa mampu. Apakah aku mampu sekarang? Aku harap sih iya.
Mau mandiri atau mau dilindungi???
Mandiri dong, tapi kalau dilindungi juga.. sekali-sekali ga apa-apa kok, asal jangan terus-terusan atau jadi ketergantungan. hehehehehe

lucu juga ya.. dari digonggongin anjing jadi refleksi diri XD

ini lagi iseng, mencoba membuat sesuatu yang sesuai dengan KBBI
entah maksud hati ini tercapai atau tidak... (walau tampaknya saya telah menyalahi aturan berbahasa Indonesia yang baik dan benar dalam beberapa kalimat yang telah saya sadari, tapi untuk mengubah menjadi benar... terasa janggal dan tak nyaman... Akhirnya dibiarkan sajalah hehehehehe)

just thoughts

2009-05-21T21:35:00.004+02:00

Begitu lama saya berhenti meng-update, sampai bingung harus mulai dari mana.....

yang sebenarnya ingin saya teriakkan......

I'M GOING ON A HOLIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!
yay!!!!!!!
^^

well... er... it's still on July though...
but who cares? just for the thought of it, excites me!
I'm going to Barcelona, Rome, and.. maybe Florence!!!!!
3 cities that I want to visit since a long time ago, and here's my chance! ^^

Am I going alone this time?
... almost (sigh....) >.<
luckily my friend Nickie is coming from UK to join me!!! ^^
We haven't met more than a year now. and now we're going on a holiday together... is such an awesome thing ^^
can't wait to finalize everything and then just wait for the happy days to come...

After a week around Europe holiday with Nickie, I'm planning to go back to Zug for a day or 2, just to organize my things for the last time before my flight to Atlanta.
Yup, I'm going to visit my sister again, and this time to take her daughter that is going to be born this July into my caring. ^^

Can't wait for the holiday
Can't wait to see my new, soon to be born, niece
and of course, last... but the best of all, my last day of work!!!!!!!!!!
(not that I don't like my job, but... well.... it's just... a happy thought.. hehehehe)

But... I still need to buy a handbag (quite big to suit my all-purposes in travelling) and a jeans (since my current jeans have holes now, HOLES!!! how could it be? I have NO-IDEA seriously >.<)

and... er... I think I need a bit diet.... coz I'm going to see my mom soon.... Yeah... I do need to reduce 2 or 3... or.. maybe 5 kg... >.<
but I think 2 or 3 is enough lol
I can't refused my ultimate joy in eating ^^

ia sudah tiada

2009-04-14T20:13:00.004+02:00

ia yang kau kenal
sudah tiada
ia yang kau cinta
tak lagi di sini
ia yang kau impikan
telah hilang

ia telah berubah
bukan seorang yang kau kenal
ia tak lagi seperti dulu

kau hanya mengejar bayangan
kau mengejar dia
yang telah tiada

ia tak lagi disini
ia telah pergi
bukan sembunyi

kau tunjukkan sayang
pada orang yang salah
orang yang berbeda
dia bukan ia

ia sudah tiada
ia tak lagi di sini
ia telah hilang

ia yang kau kenal
telah berubah
ia yang sekarang
tak lagi kau kenal

few words

2009-03-10T09:11:00.002+01:00

well....
what can I say......
I want to write longer >.<
I really want to >.<
but now... I only have half an hour before I have to catch the bus and here I am, still haven't got out of my cozy bed yet.
hehehehe

even when I have spare time.....
I spent if for "Legend" the Korean drama series, hehehe
the story is good, the legend is... somehow... sad :(
and honestly, I hate sad ending stories, so I hope the drama will have a happy ending (I'm watching episode 8 out of 24).

and oh.....
I got my final 2nd ROA already!!!!
my average is 86 :(
T.T
I hate accounting report
and the group member of the other report is.. er... not so... fortunate >.<
(sigh.............)
what can I do..
it's life.. so.. ENJOY it!!!!!!!!!
^^

This year Valentine's day is quite ordinary for me.
I hope for nothing
since I'm going to work the whole day anyway
hahaha
strangely, I got a strange dream, that made me wrote this poet on the morn of the "V" day

I have no hope with you
I thought
I’ve given up on you
I thought
I’ve been over you
I thought

Saat kubuka mata
Di senja tadi
Aku terhenyak
Dalam mimpi
Engkau ada

There’s a breakfast in front of the door
With a little note,
Make sure that I have breakfast before I go to work
(something that I’ve really rarely done)
there’s a message on my cell
shy, awkward words

semua itu
ciptaan khayalan saat tidur
menyingkap keinginan hati
yang terkubur

something impossible
things that will not happen in reality

harapan kosong
belaka

Today
Just like yesterday
I’m not hoping for anyone

Well, the valentine's day is quite good actually.
I got the whole atmosphere since I'm working in a restaurant and you can guess our customers would be couples, and even we gave some special extra decoration and services. One of my college, he's a player I could tell, he gave every single working woman in the restaurant a rose, so I got a rose. Well, I dried it for sure, like I did with every rose that came to my possession lol, but the best part is....... I got a lot of tips!!!! lol
I love Valentine's day ^^

so many things in my mind... so little time

2009-03-07T10:02:00.002+01:00

after I've been isolated in the online world (my internet is not working at all!! well, except from my cell phone), so many things have run through my mind...
so many things that I want to write, but I couldn't
I don't have the media
I don't have the time (working 10-12 hours a day is exhausting)
sometimes I have them so solid in my mind but I'm too lazy to write them down
hehehe
my old disease..
yeah... I know

starting from the..
Valentine
human instinct
working
power of mind
and the last.... from today....
the truth or lies of history and governments (I've just finished reading an analysis of an NTU student that is rumored to try to kill his prof. and did suicide, well, it's just an analysis from 1 point of view, the truth is something that no one knows since the subject of the story is no longer live in this world)
well, the subject is not about this person, but I got an idea to write about another subject that is inspired by this, about the lies in the histories that we learned.
well, the history from every country is different, well, just take the easy one, the winner is always the the good side.
for example, if and only if, NAZI never lost, maybe the history that we learn today, that Hitler is a good man, well, of course all of the killings will be covered anyway, and no one knows about it, or maybe just keep silent and no one is going to talk about it. Or even if we know that he was an evil man which kills a lot of people, we still got some good points about him. If and only if, he won.
and it's also depends on which country you are.. the same event will have different stories depends on which side did you learn about it.

anyway, I'm not going to discuss this longer, I got to go to Zurich, and I need to catch my bus to catch my train.
hehehehe

my second internship

2009-02-01T20:19:00.002+01:00

I'm in Zug now...
right... for my second internship.

I've been working for a week now.
is it good?
well.... I could say..... it's okay... even... I might be luckier than my friends that are also work for the same company. My working place is the furthest, I need to take bus to go there, but.. the people that I'm working with is quite good, my restaurant is not as busy as theirs, and of course, I got better tips. Though when I just arrived home they all already ready to go to bed. hehehe

Well, the people that I'm working with are quite good, so I'm quite content with them. though of course, not all... hehehe. and honestly, I prefer that my supervisor would like to teach me more about everything. She haven't really teach me about anything, and she's troubled and complaining that I don't know enough or I worked so slow.. of course I can't work fast and I need to ask her for almost every little thing since I don't know anything!! But other than that... she's nice, and I like her too ^^

The chefs are good too. Even one of them teach me a bit German and Thai from the menu. hehehe. Only one that is quite annoying.. He's so .... bossy and complaining quite a lot.. Luckily he's not there everyday hehehe...

There's another restaurant that I need to work too, but only for lunch time and only for temporary. It's also a good Thai restaurant, though much busier than Imperial. It's really nice to work here, my Indonesian friend also works here and even the supervisor is also an Indonesian and he's really nice too. It's like working for fun there ^^
Too bad that I'm just going to work there temporarily.

My room.... honestly not really good, but... since I already been warned that it's really bad... It's still much better than what I was imagining, so.. It's still very good lol. I got quite a big room and it's only for 2 of us, me and my friend. Though.. of course.. the bed is a cheap one, including with the bed sheets and all.. My blanket has several holes on it, the heater is not working properly... Luckily we got another small heater, that save our lives during the cold winter nights... hehe. And even now.. my mind already running around how to make my room more cozy... lol

When we already bought new bed sheets, my roommate is going to move the bed into the corner, than we're going to have more space... I'm going to ask for the blanket from my Indo supervisor, he told me that he have more if we need, and I'm going to put my holes blanket as a carpet so we can sit on the floor.. I might also buy some pillows hehehe. We're going to buy a small fridge to put our food supplies there, including milk, yoghurt, and... ice cream ^^.

I just hope that summer will come soon. Since Zug is a beautiful city near the lake anyway.. I tried to walk along the lake last week.. but.. it seems that winter winds is trying to put me back to my chamber. hahahahahahahaha

my last day at School

2009-01-24T12:42:00.002+01:00

This is the end of my short vacation, actually it already ended since yesterday.... since I was packing the whole day.....

I can't imagine I have so many stuff!!!!!

and incredibly... I managed to pack everything!!!! though... moving is another big challenge! lol

I put 1 box at school, that's the only box that we could put at school. I have 1 luggage and 2 boxes that I'll send through post to my new city, and I'll leave 1 bag in Leysin with my roommate that I'll take later and... I'll carry 1 back pack and 1 small bag to my new place tonight.

What am I doing now?

waiting for the train station to reopen after lunch break to send my 3 valuable items, then... I'll be officially ready to go. In the same time, I also enjoyed the unlimited though slow internet that I have now. Cause I might need to survive a week or more without internet lol.

Prepared to be a bit isolated in the new place for a moment before I could gain the connection again. ^^

I've done packing, now just waiting for the time to go....

I'm wondering about the new life that I'll have

about the new place that I'll live

the new place that I'll work

the people that I'll work and live with.........

It's like going somewhere that I don't know...

and I'm just depending on hopes.......

I hope everything is going to be ok

I hope everything will run well

My short holiday

2009-01-22T10:44:00.002+01:00

Akhiranyaaa..........

Setelah melalui hari-hari penuh penderitaan belajar, liburan ini datang juga... Yah.. walaupun cuma libur dalam arti beberapa hari yang kurang dari seminggu. Ulangan terakhir hari Selasa, Hari Senin, sudah mulai kerja... Maka... libur yang sudah pendek ini masih dipersingkat dengan kebutuhan ngepack dan pindahan.

Tapi.. yang namanya liburan, harus full liburan dong. hehehehe. Sejak hari Selasa kemarin sudah kuhabiskan waktuku dengan membaca komik, lalu kemarin pun aku sudah pergi berkuda untuk mungkin yang terakhir kalinya dalam tempo waktu yang agak panjang. Soalnya di Zug nanti, blom tentu ada tempat berkuda yang terjangkau dalam arti waktu, area, bahasa, dan juga biaya. hehehe. Lalu malamnya, kami mengadakan pesta selesai ujian kecil-kecilan.

Hari ini???? Aqua Park!!!! ^^ Mari kita bermain air. hehehehe. Ini akan jadi hari pertama bagi diriku bermain di Aqua Park. Aku emang males sih berenang... tapi klo main air, kayaknya asyik juga, lagian di sekitar sini tidak banyak tempat bermain yang bisa untuk jadi tempat pelampiasan. hehehe.

Semoga saja semuanya berjalan lancar....

Aku akan baru mulai ngepack.... em... mungkin nanti malam. Perginya.... hari Minggu barengan sama anak-anak yang lain. ^^

Liburan memang singkat, kurang dari seminggu... kurang rasanya

T.T

the end is yet to come....

2009-01-17T13:20:00.003+01:00

My exams are almost over......

Setelah penderitaan yang dimulai dari hari Senin.... akhirnya telah sampailah saya pada hari Sabtu, dimana hanya tinggal event presentation pada hari Senin dan Marketing Exam pada hari Selasa. hehehe.

Kembali kepada kebiasaanku.. di saat aku seharusnya membaca buku Marketing, kuputuskan untuk menulis blog. hehe

Ujianku..... dimulai dari biscom yang benar" mengarang bebas seindah-indahnya, dilanjutkan dengan french 3 yang listeningnya super cepet seakan-akan si direktur dari Guide Michelin itu bakal mati klo tidak menyelesaikan semua yang ingin dia katakan dalam tempo waktu sesingkat-singkatnya........ yang membuat semua pengerja exam menghela napas sedalam-dalamnya saat recording itu selesai. Mau bagaimana lagi? kita harus menjawab pertanyaan-pertanyaan based on the recording yang cepatnya bagai dikejar setan itu dan only from this recording, nilainya 25 point out of 100!!!!!!!!

Gila... aku jawabnya cuma berdasarkan common sense dan pengetahuan dari bacaan tentang gudie michelin waktu kelas terakhir french.... I hope that it helps hehehe

Then introduction to tourism... I like the subject, I like the teacher, for sure I can do it well. hehehe. I even studied the dark age out of curiosity.. and found more about the vampire's legends!!!! Nice reading.... ^^ hahahahahaha

Then the housekeeping management.... er... not so good.. but... hei!!!!! it's over!!!!! I don't even need to open those books anymore!!!! hehehehe

Adios, Au revoir, ^^

The accounting report is done too!!!! well, I think it might not be really good.. but I don't care anymore! it's so confusing..... >.<

Just really glad that we've finished it! hehehehe

Yesterday.. I decided to be my holiday... I went to Aigle with my roommate for lunch, it's in a Thai Restaurant, we really felt as if we're back to Asia... such a nice feeling. ^^ then we went to Vevey. I found a scarf that I was looking in Esprit for in a cheap price ^^.

Well, I only got 2 more things to do now... and I only concerned about marketing.. because of the essays questions.... that each worth 40 points..... I can't fail to answer any!!! since if I failed, for sure I'm going to fail the course, cause the passing grade is 70.........

*sigh.. *

Wish me luck!!!!

Not in a mood for exam

2009-01-11T21:01:00.002+01:00

>.<

Tomorrow is the first day of the final exams.....

but still.... I'm in my playful mood, I haven't even read anything today...

until now!!!!! and it's night already.......

er...

maybe because tomorrow is business communication anyway, there's nothing to study.

or... even though there's something to study, something to read... I'll finish it in... 2 hours at the most. For sure. Because... I knew this.. then... I'm not trying to study now....

hehehehehehe

but still... I don't feel like the exams are in front of my face, no!!

It felts like a usual week, without any exam or homework, a week where I could just lazying around.....

though of course... it's not as easy as it seems to be...

ok, here's my schedule

Monday : Business Communication Exam 2 PM

Tuesday : French 3 Exam 4 PM

Wednesday : Introduction to Tourism Exam 10 AM

Thursday : Housekeeping Management Exam 8 AM

Friday : Accounting Report 3 PM

Monday : Introduction to Events Presentation 8 AM

Tuesday : Marketing Exam 8 AM

Not as full as my first year's schedule though, this year's is more relax and not that cramped together.

So... it is quite good actually.

After all of these exams.... it's time for me to have fun, it's time for me to start packing!!!!!

Since I'll move to Zug, I guess maybe on the 24th, since I'll start working on 26th. So I'll have one day to unpack and familiarize with the environment. Plus, to subscribe with the internet provider, I really need internet to give some colors in my internship live. Since I'll have nothing to do when I'm not working, I need the internet to watch movies, chat with my friends, call my parents and friends, read news, and of course... blogging.

hehehehehehehehehehe

...............

what should I do so I could have a better mood for exam?

so I could study better?

what should I do?????

what could I do???

so I could stay focus with my reviews??

Pelarian dari tugas

2009-01-07T14:14:00.003+01:00

Penyakitku kumat lagi....
Disaat aku seharusnya mengerjakan sesuatu yang seharusnya kukerjakan... aku melarikan diri dengan cara mencari hal lain untuk dikerjakan. Contohnya??? Blogging hahahahaha.

Aku baru saja dari internship office, sign contract buat internshipku yang ke2. Jadi waiter di Imperial Thai di Zug, Switzerland. Aku sudah liat foto-fotnya di internet, keren sih, kayaknya aku bisa lumayan betah kerja di sana, mulai dari 28 Januari sampai dengan 27 Juli. Gajinya? Lumayaaannnn... gaji kotor 2200 CHF, bersihnya 1287.55 CHF plus tips..... hehehe. Denger-denger nih.... tips lumayan.. bisa mencapai 500-700 CHF sebulan. Wow...... asyik nih. hehehe. Aku memang sedang gencar-gencarnya menghitung tentang uang, maklum, CHF lagi tinggi banget dibandingkan rupiah, apalagi sekarang di Indo keadaan ekonominya sedang tidak baik. Timbullah keinginan untuk meringankan beban orang tua, apalagi mulai semester depan uang sekolahku juga ikut naik. Maunya sih, beda kenaikan nanti aku yang tanggung. Semoga saja semuanya berjalan lancar dan aku sanggup untuk menjalankan rencanaku ini. ^^

Seharusnya apa yang aku lakukan sekarang??
Menyelesaikan event presentation. Sudah hampir selesai sih, cuma tinggal menambahkan foto dan animasi. hehe

Tapi mood ini jujur... bukanlah mood untuk belajar atau sekolah... Aku sedang berada di alam mimpi.. Masih terngiang-ngiang di benakku tentang film yang kutonton dari minggu lalu. Hong Gil Dong, lalu sekarang.. Beethoven Virus. Film ini benar-benar menggelitik jiwa seniku. Aku memang tidak berbakat ataupun mahir dalam musik, tapi aku benar-benar menikmati musik. Aku suka main piano walau aku tau, aku mainnya ga pernah bagus-bagus amat. Mulai dari teknik yang pas-pasan, jarang latihan, kurang penghayatan, sampai kurangnya pengetahuan tentang istilah-istilah musik yang didominasi bahasa Itali. Tapi aku memang main hanya untuk hobi, hanya untuk senang-senang, asal aku senang... itu saja sudah cukup. ^^
Yang mengesalkan... saat aku sedang ingin main piano.. piano itu jauh dari jangakauan. Piano di Grand Hall suaranya amatlah sangat menyedihkan, piano yang di Gereja... males untuk jalan keluar disaat winter. Apalagi sekarang lagi kepengen belajar main biola.. Keinginan ini sudah dari lama sih, tapi selalu tidak pernah tercapai. Dulu waktu membentuk "Pachabels Blue", duet piano dan biola.. aku sempat ketemu guru biolanya dan sempat mau belajar. Sayang saat itu sudah mau ulangan umum, dan tertundalah lagi, lalu sesudahnya, tibalah saya di kelas XII, final year in high school, dan hilanglah lagi kesempatan.

Apa boleh buat.....
mungkin suatu hari nanti,

Jujur, aku awalnya nonton film Beethoven Virus ini gara-gara pemainnya Jang Geun Suk, si pemeran Prince Lee Chang Hwi di Hong Gil Dong. Tapi peran yang ia mainkan di film ini beda jauh dari sisi karakter dan penampilan. Aku ga ngeh waktu liat penampilannya yang modern di film ini, apalagi karakternya di sini sungguh ceria, tidak seperti peran mellow si pangeran. Tapi setelah kutonton sampai episode 7, ceritanya juga tidak kalah menarik, apalagi lagu-lagu klasik yang terus menjadi tema. Lumayan, menambah pengetahuan tentang lagu klasik dan para komposer terkenalnya. Aku pun kembali tertantang untuk mengetes memory isitlah-istilah classical pieces yang kupelajari waktu SD dulu. Sungguh menarik.. tampaknya aku selalu haus akan ilmu....

Pengetahuan di dunia ini.. begitu banyak dan begitu menarik...
Aku ingin tau
Aku penasaran
Aku ingin belajar
Aku ingin bisa
Tapi...........
Tampaknya walaupun kubelajar seumur hidup.. rasa haus ini tidak akan pernah terpuaskan.

Hong Gil Dong songs

2009-01-04T15:15:00.002+01:00

I got the full album for Hong Gil Dong ^^
at last......
after downloading for hours and hours..... hehehehehehehehehe

2 of my favorite songs are actually... er... sad songs.
But even the story is so sad in the end, that the impression that lasts is so sad that it even still hurt my heart when I remembered or hear the songs...

This is 'what if' by Tae Yeon from Girls Generation

manyageh naega gandamyeon
naega dagagandamyeon
neon eoddeogeh saenggakhalgga
yonginaelsu eobtgo

manyageh niga gandamyeon
niga ddeonagandamyeon
neol eoddeogeh bonaeyahalji
jaggoo geobi naneun geol

naega babo gataseo
barabolsu bakkeman eobtneungeon amado
wemyeon haljidomoreul ni maeumgwa
ddo keuraeseo deo mareojil saiga dwelggabwa

jeongmal babo gataseo
saranghanda haji mothaneungeon amado
mannam dwiyeh gidarineun apeumeh
seulpeun nanaldeuri dooryeowoseo ingabwa

manyageh niga ondamyeon
niga dagaondamyeon
nan eoddeogeh haeyamanhalji
jeongmal alsu eobtneungeol

naega babo gataseo
barabolsu bakkeman eobtneungeon amado
wemyeon haljidomoreul ni maeumgwa
ddo keuraeseo deo mareojil saiga dwelggabwa

jeongmal babo gataseo
saranghanda haji mothaneungeon amado
mannam dwiyeh gidarineun apeumeh
seulpeun nanaldeuri dooryeowoseo ingabwa

naega babo gataseo
saranghanda haji mothaneungeon amado
mannam dwiyeh gidarineun apeumeh
seulpeun nanaldeuri dooryeowoseo ingabwa

If i were to go
If i were to get close to you
What would you think?
I don’t have the courage.

If you were to go,
If you were to leave.
I don’t know how to send you away
It keeps hanging on my mind

I know i am a fool and can only watch you from afar
Your heart may look away from me…
And so we could even become strangers

Just like a fool i can’t even say that i love you because …
We’re afraid the wait that comes upon us
After we meet will be painful and sad.

If you were to come
To come near me.
What would i do ?
I really don’t know

Because im like a fool.
Even though i know looking is all i can do
Your heart may look away from me
And so we could even become strangers

Just like a fool i can’t even say that i love you because….
We’re afraid the wait that comes upon us
After we meet will be painful and sad

Because i’m like a fool
Even though i can’t say i love you
We’re afraid the wait that comes upon us
After we meet will be painful and sad.

만약에 내가 간다면 내가 다가간다면
넌 어떻게 생각할까 용기 낼 수 없고

만약에 니가 간다면 니가 떠나간다면
널 어떻게 보내야할지 자꾸 겁이 나는걸

내가 바보같아서 바라볼 수 밖에만 없는건 아마도
외면 할지도 모를 니 마음과 또 그래서 더 멀어질 사이가 될까봐

정말 바보같아서 사랑한다하지 못하는건 아마도
만남뒤에 기다리는 아픔에 슬픈 나날들이 두려워서인가봐

만약에 니가 온다면 니가 다가온다면
난 어떻게 해야만 할지 정말 알수 없는걸

내가 바보같아서 바라볼 수 밖에만 없는건 아마도
외면 할지도 모를 니 마음과 또 그래서 더 멀어질 사이가 될까봐

정말 바보같아서 사랑한다하지 못하는건 아마도
만남 뒤에 기다리는 아픔에 슬픈 나날들이 두려워서인가봐

내가 바보같아서 사랑한다하지 못하는건 아마도
만남 뒤에 기다리는 아픔에 슬픈 나날들이 두려워서인가봐

the other one is 'fate' by Park Wan Kyu

naega neomu yaghaeseo naega neomu nabbaseo
Geujeo ireohge neol bogoman issseo
Nae jichin maeumdo nae gipeun sangcheodo
oraen gieogcheoreom ijeoseottnabwa..
nareul gamdang hal suga eobseo~
neoegeman maedallige dwe

neo ireohge gajima~~
nae simjangi neoreul bureujanha~
michidorog janinhan inyeone
deoisang amugeotdeo hal suga oebseo

seulpeunnae moseubdo seulpeunneoe nunbitdo
geujyeo seuchyeoganeun baramiryeona
gachin baramsorie gwi0reul magabojiman
neoreul boneun nuneun mageul su eobseo..
gateun haneurarae neowa nan
daeungoseul bogo ittnabwa..

neo ireohge gajima~~
nae simjangi neoreul bureujanha~
michidorog janinhan inyeone
deoisang amugeotdeo hal suga oebseo

ggeutieobtneun maeume~~
beorilsuga eobtneun i yogsimi
na ireohge wonhago wonhaedo
neol jagyeogjocha eobtneun naingeol..

geureol jagyeogjocha~~ eobtneun naingeol..

내가 너무 약해서 내가 너무 나빠서
그저 이렇게 널 보고만 있어
나의 지친 마음도 나의 깊은 상처도
오랜 기억처럼 잊어었나봐..

나를 감당 할 수가 없어~
너에게만 매달리게 되

너 이렇게 가지마~~
내 심장이 너를 부르잖아~
미치도록 잔인한 인연에
더이상 아무것도 할 수가 없어..

슬픈나의 모습도 슬픈너의 눈빛도
그져 스쳐가는 바람이려나
거친 바람소리에 귀를 막아보지만
너를 보는 눈은 막을 수 없어..

같은 하늘아래 너와 난
다른곳을 보고 있나봐..

너 이렇게 가지마~~
내 심장이 너를 부르잖아~
미치도록 잔인한 인연에
더이상 아무것도 할 수가 없어..

끝이없는 마음에~~
버릴수가 없는 이 욕심이
나 이렇게 원하고 원해도
널 자격조차 없는 나인걸..

그럴 자격조차~~없는 나인걸..

—-

Because I am so weak, because I am so bad
I am just watching you like this.
My worn-out mind and my deep scar
I must have forgotten them like an old memory.
I cannot handle myself,
I end up clinging on to you.

Don’t leave like this
(Don’t you see) My heart is calling out to you.
In this cruel fate, that drives me crazy,
There is nothing more I can do.

My sad appearance and the sad look in your eyes –
I wonder if they are just a passing wind.
Although I try to block my ears from the rough sound of the wind
I cannot block my eyes from seeing you.
You and I under the same sky
We must be looking towards different places.

Don’t leave like this
(Don’t you see) My heart is calling out to you.
In this cruel fate, that drives me crazy,
There is nothing more I can do.

In an endless feeling, this greed I can’t abandon
Although, like this, I want and want
It is I that has no right to have you.
It is I that has no right to have you.

Sorry....

2009-01-03T20:42:00.002+01:00

dedicated to someone that used to be 'my someone'

I'm sorry to tell you this
I know I'm selfish
But I really need to tell you this
for this is my answer...

I'm sorry if you still felt the same way as before
sorry if you are still waiting for me
impatiently
sorry for all the pain that you have to endure

but honestly
I don't think we could be the same as we used to be
not only that both of us knew that it has no future
but I have lost the precious feeling that we had.
to force it,
will have nothing in result
only to add new scar for both of us

you were sorry to push me around
but still, you pushed me again and again

I'm very sorry to tell you this,
but I don't want to start new
both of us knew it will lead to nothing

I'm sorry that I don't even want to try
for I know, the feeling will never come back

the future that I've planned
has no place for you
I know it's cruel to say
but if I don't tell you clearly,
you'll start to push me again

sorry that I'm very evil to tell you this,
But I'm waiting for someone else
not you

but you ask for the truth,
and the truth that I gave.

This is the thing that I've been telling you for times
again and again
it's over.

Please forget me,
please start a new with someone
someone that will cherish you better than me
someone that you will love more than me

Please move on
don't stay where you are right now

I'm sorry...................

movie Hong Gil Dong

2009-01-01T13:52:00.003+01:00

I just finished a Korean Drama, Hong Gil Dong, this morning.

It means... yes... I spent my new year watching this Korean series. hehehehe Well, I did have a small party with my friends, open a bottle of wine, took some pictures, then... I went back to my fantasy world.

This morning, my mind run back to the movie, to the story....
My feeling is still the same as this morning.. my heart is crying, how could there be a sad story such as this? This is a story, and like other stories, I hope that this one will end happily, I've been thinking about what kind of happy ending the story will have, but it turns out to be not that happy. It made me shed tears...

In this story, the character that caught my attention is the legitimate prince. He is the son of the previous queen, and the second prince of the nation. After his father death, he received a royal sword from his father with the inscription that will make him the next king. But then, his older brother, the first prince set fire in his palace, killing his mother, and made him run away setting a fake death of him behind. He has been a dead person in the eye of the world.

20 years later, he has gathered a lot of money and power secretly with the mask of a merchant. He grew to be a cold man that only has one goal, to fulfill his destiny and become king. Accidentally, he met a dimwitted, reckless girl that eventually could open his heart and made him more human, he learned what is it mean to cherish and to protect something. With the hero of the story, he found the reason why he should be king, to protect his people, give them better live.

The present king, his older brother, has become insane. He has a deep guilty feeling inside, that he had kill his own brother in order to ascend the throne, he keeps having delusion of ghosts that came to blame him. He became a crazy king that never care about his people, and so the the people are suffering.

After he succeeded to ascend the throne, his older brother told him a secret that just has been revealed, the royal sword with the inscription on it is fake, the real one, doesn't have anything written on it. The one who fake the sword is his own mother, he never was the real king. All that he had been believed was a lie, he lost his trust, his reason.

Though eventually, he gain back his reason to become king, to cherish and protect his people, he faced a new challenge, the hero, hong gil dong is a bastard, therefore, a slave, a criminal, but he was his loyal friend, a hero for the people. He tried to give him official title, but the nobles and other government officials keep complaining. Then, a rumor of the hope of the people to make the hero become King, the law stated him as traitor, and has to be executed. In order to become a real king that could control his ministers and scholars, he should kill gil dong. His fiancee, the reckless girl that opened his heart, has been in love with gil dong for a long time and decided to go to Gil Dong's side. Knowing to take her by force will only kill her innerself, but to let her go, means that she would be killed too, and that will kill his innerself.

In the end, he let her go...
Having silenced all of the complaints from the ministers, he ruled as the greatest king in the history.

Such a sad story, a sad ending for him, and also for the hero of the movie...

If I was in his position...
knowing that everything that I believed was a lie... honestly, I wouldn't know what to do, I would be too confuse to do anything, I might run away, I might be pretending that I never know the truth..
Though I hope for a happy ending...
Logically, it won't be easy to change something that already like blood to the society at that time, the different of royalties and slaves. Although he is the king, the king alone couldn't change anything. He need support from his ministers, his subordinates, his people. This kind of plot, is something that most likely to happen in the real world.
Sad.. isn't it... the world that we lives in... is not a world of a happy ending.

There's a song that also very sad... just hearing it could make me sad, though I don't know the meaning of the words, but then I found out the meaning of the words. It is a sad song.

The end of New Moon

2008-12-19T21:12:00.002+01:00

Yup, you guessed it.
I've finished!!!!!!!!!!!!
^^

it's so nice reading it.. I never could let to any book when I almost reach the end of it. I just couldn't... I'll keep reading, reading, and reading until I reach the words "the end" or "to be continued". Weird??? Sure it is... But.. I just couldn't help it. hehehe

I started get glued to it since the part when Bella has to go Italy, to save Edward from provoking the Volturi Family... Maybe part of it.. because I was really thrilled... at last... after tons of chapters with no Edward Cullen in those... Well, he isn't the reason why I read the book.. But, the story is about a girl that falls in love with him, it's a love story.. and those chapters are about brokenhearted, pain, delusion, and all of that sort of negative feelings of a brokenhearted girl.

it's just... not something that I would love to read about. hehehe
Not because that it also reminds me of my own past experience of post broken relationship, but I am used to... feel the characters emotions in the book. Specially the ones that are the protagonists. I'll feel happy when it's a happy ending, when something sad happens, I could cry with them.
Silly???
Yes, I guess I am.
XD

Now that I've finished the book, with a happy ending, I couldn't be happier. And now, the book took me to a scene, a city... an old one, that brought a lot of imagination to me. A city that practically within my reach, Volterra, a small city in Italy. And now... I'm having a holiday.... now, I don't need a visa to go to Schengen countries.... God, this is really tempting me!!!!!
I would really love to go there. I am.
The only string that bounds me to where I am now... is money.
Right, I don't have the money to support my leisure tourism. Though, actually, yes I have the money.. but.. NO. It's the money that I intend to keep at all cost, it's for something that is very urgent and unpredictable. So, I couldn't let go my insurance just for a moment of euphoria, right???

Anyway, I put Volterra on the list of places that I definetly go if I have the chance!!!
^^

This is the end of my New Moon...

My words as Isabella Swan

2008-12-17T23:39:00.003+01:00

you told me to go on with live
mortal life

pretended that you've never existed
not just in my life
but in the whole world

you took away all of the proof of your existence
you didn't left any trails
nothing that I could treasure
not even a shadow

can't you see that it's so cruel??
to leave me behind with all of these tears?

you said mortal memory is fragile
it'll fade with time

at least....
let me remember you as my sweet memory
left me something that I could treasure till the end of my life

don't ask me to pretend that you never exist
for you are special for me
in every way that I could describe

the way you left me now
hurt me so deeply.........................

So deep
that the pain will still lingers
till the time I won't feel any pain anymore

I'm Brokenhearted...

2008-12-17T23:13:00.005+01:00

I decided to start reading the books. I know, I know... those are Christmas presents... I am not supposed to touch the books before Christmas!!! I know...... >.<. I also think that way.... But.. I'm going to spent 6 days of my holiday to work, and I still have that 2 reports to be done, Plus that 1 presentation, and those exams that are coming..

Especially one of my lovely teachers insisted us to read the text book and lots of other theory books to support our analysis!!!! It seems that I've found my boyfriend for the next 3 weeks.. : Marketing and Front Office books.... (sigh...... >.<)

How about the books that I just received????
Well, I planned on finishing them by the end of this week!!!!!!!!
lol
^^
XD

I started with New Moon, with the so perfect boyfriend, Edward Cullen.....
After I read few chapters..... there goes my romantic dreams....... he left Bella!!!
I've always been drifted along with the story of the book that I read, sometimes I could be drowned so deep that I could completely forgot the real world that I am in. And now.. when the story went to the side that I never favor (but I know a total all the time happy story would be very boring), I am in a point that I need a break of reading. It means that I won't continue reading until I'm ready. XD

My feeling right now.. would be best describe as... brokenhearted.. as a girl and a reader, it would be normal for me to place myself as the girl protagonist, especially if the story is from inside her eyes. Now that she is brokenhearted and the way they parted is just... so painful that I could almost felt the despair within myself. The best thing to describe it is the Evanescence song, My Immortal.

I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave
Coz your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

You used to captivate me by your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

I tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone,
But though you're still with me, I've been all alone all along

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me, me, me, me

My Parcel has arrived!! ^^

2008-12-17T13:36:00.002+01:00

Last Thursday night I was just curiously checking the books on internet.. it unexpectedly made me realized that I never had a package sent to me.. Well... now that I remember.... it's only once.. another online shopping. But that's it, I never received any letters apart from the letters I received from bank regularly. Honestly... I longed for letters or packages.... since my friends often received those things from their friends or family. Well, I never asked for them to my family or friends either... coz.. I don't really need anything, true. But.... still... somehow.. I keep checking the mailbox and hope for something would be there (though of course, it always nothing inside). XD

So... I decided to buy my own Christmas gift. Coz.. I know that my parents won't send me anything, though maybe I'll get some presents from my friends in Switzerland. And I'll spent Christmas in here anyway, most probably with only some of my friends, small little celebration without anything much to expect. For New Year... I'll spend it by working. Yup.. working. I'm not that dissapointed though, cause... er... nothing really special that I could do anyway.

Last year I did speant my new year's eve partying in Montreux. It's a grand Party with 21 great DJ's. It was really fun, but tiring in the same time. I remembered I was fighting with the urge to sleep in the train station while waiting for the first train. And even in the train I need to stand all the way up to Leysin since, all of the people went partying and went back with the first train.. It was very crowded. And when I eventually reach my room, I couldn't go to bed without shower, it's something that I just can't do.. and eventhough I'm very tired, I only could sleep for 3 hours, and then I couldn't sleep anymore. It was fun while partying, but the after party is not that really fun.... So I decided not to go there again this year.

So... I came to a resolution... I'll buy something for myself. Then.. the 2 books that I've been dreaming for months..... Brisingr (the 3rd book of Eragon) and New Moon (the 2nd book of Twilight). ^^
It's really cheap anyway, it's cheaper than if I bought from the bookstore. Not to mention if they have the book in english!!! Almost everything here is in French. So.. I'm really happy about it. For these past few days...... I've the feeling of excitement that I've never experienced for quite a long time.. It's fun.

I counted the days...
I keep remembering it...
There's something that I'm waiting for..
and the best thing is...
I know that it's coming!!!!!!
For sure!!!
hehehe
^^
I felt like a little girl again all of a sudden. Like a child that is waiting for Christmas to come, eager to unwrap all of the boxes under the Christmas Tree.

And... the package came!!! Today!!!!
I'm soooo happy ^^

Though... maybe if it came longer....
It would be more fun....
coz I'll still have something to wait for..
hehehe

Pemikiran hari ini

2008-12-09T13:19:00.002+01:00

duuuh
dasar otak ini...
maunya bermimpi terus, males untuk melihat kenyataan, padahal kan banyak yang harus dilakukan untuk menghadapi dunia nyata. Tugas-tugas yang harus aku lakukan:

Banquet report
French presentation
Geography presentation
Event presentation
Front office report
Accounting report
Cari internship

Tapi dasar saat aku baru mau mulai mengerjakan.... Kesadaran ini kembali terbang melewati gunung dan awan ke alam fantasi dan imajinasi. Kapan aku bisa selesai???

Apalagi aku harus dengan giat mengejar nilai-nilai ku yang jatuh karena report. Tadi report Marketing baru dibagi >.<. Untungnya... aku masih pass. Aku sudah patah harapan sih.... soalnya... gimana ya..

Jujur nih, aku memang agak males, kalau kerja, ga bisa dari jauh-jauh hari, pasti kalau sudah agak mendekati deadline baru otak ini giat bekerja. Tapi aku tau aku pasti bisa. Sedangkan kemaren, aku kerja bareng dengan partnerku. Dia itu rajin sih, tapi sayang, agak sombong dan terlalu yakin akan kemampuan dia sendiri. Tadinya sih, aku seneng banget bisa kerja bareng dia, soalnya dia kayaknya rajin dan pintar... Tapi ternyata kepintaran dia itu telah membutakan matanya... T.T Dia kerjakanlah satu report itu sendirian tanpa perduli akan kontribusiku terhadap report itu. Salahku juga sih, aku lambat dalam mengerjakan.. Tapi dia juga tidak bilang-bilang akan kemajuan report tersebut. Masa tiba-tiba dia bilang dia sudah selesai????

Apalagi setelah dia konsultasi dengan guru mata pelajarannya, guru ini telah berkata, semua analisa kita harus didukung oleh teori dan direferensi (dia dengan sombongnya menganggap semuanya benar tanpa harus didukung para ahli dan tentunya, tidak direferensi dengan benar... Jujur, kontribusiku dalam report ini bisa dibilang sangat sedikit, aku cuma membenarkan semua layout, membenarkan penulisan kata-katanya yang sering salah eja dan menambahkan solusi marketing yang lain.

Terbukti saja dari hasil yang dibagi..... nilainya hanya pass, dan aku sudah bersyukur banget!!! Tampaknya guruku ini masih bermurah hati dalam memberikan nilai.

Kalian mungkin akan bertanya-tanya, kalau aku sudah tau dari awal bahwa report ini memang tidak bagus dan tidak memenuhi standard, kenapa aku tidak membenarkan saja sebelum dikumpul?? Well... soalnya... teman kerjaku ini ya itu sombong dan yakin bahwa kerjaannya itu benar, padahal sudah kukejar-kejar untuk membuat referens, tapi dia dengan malasnya, dan menuliskan di salah satu media komunikasi internet tanpa bayar yang telah digunakan dengan luas di seluruh dunia setelah namanya bahwa dia tidak butuh referens, karena dia sudah pintar!!!
=.='' ini benar-benar reaksiku waktu membaca tulisannya itu.. Kesal?? iya!! Makanya aku jadi malas.. terserah dia lah, apa pun yang ingin dia lakukan, toh dia tidak menganggap atau pun menghargai aku sebagai partnernya. Kalau dia menghargai pendapatku, seharusnya dia tidak mengerjakan report itu sendirian!

Tadi pun aku sempat mencuri dengar pembicaraannya dengan teman sekelasku, dia bilang nilainya jelek. Lalu temanku pun bertanya, siapa partnermu? (Nb: partnerku ini terkenal satu sekolah sebagai seorang pelajar yang baik, disukai guru-guru, tapi ternyata dibalik imagenya yang super itu.....................) Dia jawablah dengan namaku. Lalu temanku ini (yang sebenarnya hanya kenal dan bukan teman, sejak kita pun tidak pernah berjalan seiringan dalam arti harafiah ataupun bukan) dengan reaksi yang... "oh pantas....."
aku????? KESAL
yah walaupun partnerku menambahkan, sebagian besar dia yang buat, aku hanya buat sedikit saja.

Tapi....
(sigh......)
sudahlah malas aku membahasnya.
Ini memang salahku juga kok, aku yang membiarkan report ini dikumpul walaupun aku tau betapa buruk kualitasnya.
Jadi sekarang... ya... terima sajalah.
>.<

For those who thinks my world is perfect

2008-12-07T20:17:00.004+01:00

I've been living in a dream
in a place where everything is exactly as I wished
though reality is near
it's covered with a thick mist
though sometimes I got some glimpse
I ignored them
take it as a nightmare
and go on in my dream

in this mind...
my world is wonderland
so beautiful
the perfect picture
a painting without flaw
my little ball of crystal

That's what I seems to be
and that's what you think

but the reality of it...

I'm not living in a dream
but I wished I lived in that dream

I'm no princess
that's innocent and naive
who knows nothing of the world
I might seems to be one
but I'm not

the flaws of my life
are covered and decorated
you'll never seen them
unless you know to the core of me
my life is not perfect
nor that I always happy

you think that I have everything
but.. what is everything???
could anyone would ever have everything???
we live in a real world
not a fairytale
even in fairytale, there's always an evil witch

what make you so envious of me?
that you try to ruin my world
that is not even near to perfect??

how could you betray
someone that never betrayed you?

Avenged is something that is formed in my mind
but what for??
for misunderstanding my world?
I could only pity you

I do have flaws
I'm not innocent either
sadness, betrayals, depression, loneliness
are friends that come to visit every now and then

It's like having a long trip
walk slowly, enjoy the view
should I crossed path with wolves
I just cantered away
left them behind
they might have bitten me
but it's not a reason to hunt all of them down
just go on with the journey
enjoy the forest
trot and canter for fun

no one has a happily ever after kind of life
it's just the way you live your life
the way you treat others
the way you think of yourself
that makes as if you lived in a dream
a sweet dream that everyone dreams about

dorongan bermain piano

2008-11-30T12:40:00.003+01:00

entah kenapa hari ini.... aku kepengeeeeeeennnn banget main piano...
dari bangun tidur.. tiba-tiba otak ini sudah menjalankan memori lagu piano, yang membuat jari-jariku mengetuk-ngetuk ranjang seakan-akan sudah tak sadar ingin membelai piano. aku bingung... >.<
piano ada sih di sekolah, tapi di grand hall..... di ruangan besar tempat semua orang bebas untuk berkumpul, kan maluuuuu >.<
ada juga sih piano satu lagi di gereja sekitar 100 m dari sekolah... tapi... mau jalan ke sana.. dingin", ga masalah sih... tapi aku kepengen punya teman, tapi..
siapa yang bakal mau untuk diajak ke sana? ke sana pun hanya untuk dengeri gw main piano.. klo orang yang ga suka piano, ga suka musik, bisa mati bosan dengerin aku main piano, apalagi aku mainnya juga blom bagus, masih belajar, masih amatir, plus jarang banget latian.

aaarrrgggghhhhh
aku ga tau harus ngapain >.<
seandainya aku ada di rumah
seandainya aku punya piano di kamar
seandainya..
seandainya..
seandainya sekolah punya 1 ruangan khusus musik yang bisa leluasa kupakai, jadi ga perlu malu untuk main di grand hall...
seandainya
seandainya.....

klo mau dipikir, tak akan habis kata-kata andaian ini
kenapa juga hari ini otak kananku dengan keras mendikte, memerintah tanganku untuk merasa gatal ingin membelai piano dengan segera dan dengan penuh passion.....
haruskah kumelawan malu untuk main di grand hall??
ini hari minggu sih, biasanya grand hall hampir ga ada orang...
biasanya sih............
haruskah aku ke gereja sendirian?
dengan kemungkinan klo hall nya dipake, ya bakal ada orang dan aku juga ga mungki main...

bingung...
haruskah aku mencoba grand hall dulu?
kalau tidak ada orang, mungkin aku akan lebih berani walau itu di tempat umum....
atau...
haruskah aku lari ke hall gereja?????
sekarangpun jari-jariku dengan tak sabar ingin main piano dan sekarang menari-nari di atas keyboard laptop ku.
berbisik... "ayo cepat... buat keputusan.... kami tak sabar ingin menekan tuts piano........"
tapi aku sendiri masih tak kuat menahan malu... >.<

hm......
haruskah kuajak whaness untuk ke grand hall skarang?
ajak dia untuk main piano.. yah.. walaupun dia 80% bakal nolak
kalau kepepet.. ya kucoba ke gereja lah....
ini lagi nunggu upload foto selesai sih, smoga aja cepet selesai, trus aku main piano deh
hehehe
moga" whaness mau
moga" grand hall sepi... hehehe

Dear Banquet,

2008-11-23T20:23:00.005+01:00

why is your shadow still above my head?
why do I still thinking about you
and be deeply burdened by it?

I should have been over you
You should be only history for me
cause our relations are over!!!
Well, not completely though,
since I still need to see you
and we have some business undone

I'm so tired of you
honestly, I am
if I can, I want to run away
leave you behind
run away
forget everything

I hate all the problems that you brought me
I hate all of the sorrow that I have to feel
I'm so tired
physically
mentally

because of you,
I felt so exhausted
that made me tired of being care
Why should I care,
if anyone else doesn't care?????
Why do I need to clean the mess that you made??

Why should I experienced such a bad time with you?
I expected something really nice with you
like before it used to be...

honestly,
it wasn't you really...
it's all the people that were involved in our relationship
other people
that ruin our relation
too bad, isn't it?....
but it's over now

should we cross our path later
I wish, it's going to be a more intimate relation
just between us
with the people that are going to strengthen it
not to ruin it
...

though I'm disappointed
I secretly keep a deep passion for you
.
.

My ROA result

2008-11-20T12:09:00.007+01:00

Subject Mid Term Average Letter Grade GPA

Advanced French 93 89 B+ 3.30
Banquet & Events 80 80 B- 2.70
Business Communication
Financial Accounting 97 97 A+ 4.00
Front Office&Room Division 76 76 C 2.00
Front Office Operations 94 94 A 3.85
Geography of Travel & Tourism 76 76 C 2.00
Housekeeping Management 80 80 B- 2.70
Housekeeping Operations 93 93 A 3.85
Internship II
Introduction to Events 91 91 A- 3.70
Introduction to Tourism 87 87 B+ 3.30
Marketing

Total Average 86 B 3.00

Professional Attitude : Highest Professional Attitude

Provisional Passing grade : Merit

I was so scared that I'm going to fail front office management, but.. here I am.. I passed!!!!!! ^^
So happy though today I'm a bit sick...
and in two days.. in only 2 days, I'll have my banquet >.<>.<

>.< cemas..

2008-11-19T23:30:00.002+01:00

duuuh...
Aku cemas, tapi juga excited banget... >.<

Besok : midterm report
3 hari lagi : Banquet
>.<

aku udah pasrah soal FO
aku yakin... nilaiku antara 60-70
klo bisa sampe 70 ke atas... it's a miracle!!!
>.<

at least.. I know for sure that my french is 88.....
tadi dikasih tau nilainya pas di kelas french.
J'aime le francaise ^^

banquet.. banquet...
kita blom siap banget siiihhhh
tapi juga gw da ga sabar... ga sabar banget supaya banquet ini cepat berakhir
cepat berlalu
biar aku ga pusing lagi sama segala macam yang membuat kepala ini migrain
biar aku ga perlu lagi menghadapi orang-orang yang super individual dan ga bisa bertanggung jawab itu...
biar aku lepas dari belenggu posisi dan tanggung jawab yang membuat aku ga tenang akhir-akhir ini...
gimana bisa tenang??? kalo orang-orang itu ga bisa dipercaya, dikasih tanggung jawab ga mau diambil, malah dioper-oper, udah dibantu malah dimanfaatin dan disuruh-suruh. Kamu temanku katamu??? Bohong... Kalau aku temanmu kamu harusnya bantu aku bukannya tinggalin aku. Aku kesal dengan mereka.. mereka dengan mudahnya mengatakan 'kita teman' padahal cuma mau supaya aku yang ambil getahnya...
>.<

Aku mau supaya banquet ini cepat selesai
>.<
Tuhan, kabulkanlah doaku.... supaya banquet ini selesai dengan lancar, dengan masalah dan perselisihan sedikit mungkin >.<

Menunggu

2008-11-12T20:15:00.004+01:00

ada sesuatu yang hilang
sesuatu yang penting
yang membuatku gersang
bagai kerang
yang kosong

rasanya hampa
hari tanpa warna
senang sementara
sepi kembali menyapa

aku bahagia
aku kecewa
aku tertawa
aku merana
rasanya sama
hanya sementara

ke manakah harus kucari?
yang membawa mentari
yang membuatku menari
dan bernyanyi?

kutanyakan pada bintang
kubisikkan pada angin
kudendangkan pada bulan
kuisyaratkan pada awan
kumenunggu jawab mentari

j'ai attendu
j'attends
j'attendrais

bintang bermain mata
angin bernyanyi mendayu
bulan menatap lembut
awan menari riang
tapi mentari tak kunjung tiba

j'ai attendu
j'attends

j'attendrais

sampai pekat malam
membawa kelam
dan jantung ini diam

My paragliding experience

2008-11-11T21:41:00.004+01:00

hm.....

there're lots of things that I want to share right now......
really... lot's of them...

ok, gw mulai dari.. liburan gw.

Hari Kamis kemaren itu hari terakhir gw ujian. French Exam, dan ujiannya tuh selesai jam 5.15pm. Tebak gw cabut dari ni skolah jam berapa? jam 6.57 pm hehehehe. Benar-benar yang namanya selesai ujian, cabuuut!!!!! Apalagi kali ini gw dapet 3 hari buat weekend, soalnya hari Jumat kan libur jadinya hehe. ^^

Malam itu juga, gw dan teman sekamar gw pergi ke Interlaken. Jujur, kita ga gitu tau daerahnya, dan ternyata... honestly, kita ga punya rencana gimana kita mau spend the day. So, the next morning, kita cuma jalan-jalan, liat-liat toko, yah, berjalan ke mana kaki kita membawa. Lalu, tiba-tiba, gw melihat ada orang paragliding baru mendarat sekitar 100m di depan, langsunglah gw foto-foto. Tapi rumet gw... dia malah lari ke sana mau minta info. Kepengen dianya.... Wah, gw siiih... paragliding ga pernah ada di dalam kamus gw. Gimana ga?? Gw takut banget yang namanya ketinggian!!! gw ini penganut setia acrophobia. Emang, gw selalu coba untuk melatih diri gw untuk lebih friendly dengan yang namanya tempat-tempat tinggi. Contohnya, gw pernah coba rappeling, turun dari lantai 3 pake 1 tali waktu ada acara demo Pecinta Alam di SMA gw. Ok, honestly, I was quite enjoying it... but... gw juga baru nyadar klo gw gemeteran abis waktu kaki-kaki gw menjejak tanah, both my hands and legs are shaking!! But still, I like it, and I'm proud of it. hehehe

Apparently, temen sekamar gw bener-bener kepengen banget paragliding dan dia sudah memutuskan untuk positif coba sekarang juga. Karena pilot paraglidingnya ada waktu straight away. Well it's a tandem paragliding, so it's save for a beginner or.. an.. acrophobic like me. hehe. Then.. I got 2 options.. 1. go with them and try paragliding 2. stay behind and wait for her. Terus... setelah gw pikir-pikir.. kapan lagi gw bakal dapat kesempatan paragliding?? Ini sesuatu yang pasti ga akan pernah gw cari atopun gw akan ikut klo pun ada kesempatan lagi. Jadi, kenapa ga gw coba aja sekarang? Pengalaman sekali seumur hidup toh ga akan membunuh gw kan? hehehe So... I decided to come.

Emang sih, kegiatan yang satu ini cukup menguras kantong, tapi... kapan lagi coba gw coba hal yang satu ini? hehehe. Apakah gw ketakutan? oh pasti!!! Apalagi waktu liat landasannya... itu tuh pendek banget!! cuma.. 1 meter terus langsung landai banget, yang pasti gw bukannya running down, tapi rolling down! Gw takut >.< tapi waktu akhirnya disuruh lari, I have no choice but run..... run in that short track, and before I know it... I'm flying already! Scary?? Yes it is!! I screamed a bit at first lol... Yeah, I always scream if I'm scared hehehe.... for a moment, I didn't even dare to move... but then.... gw dah agak tenang, dan gw mulai menikmati pemandangan yang emang bagus banget!! Pemandangan yang ga bakal bisa gw liat kalo kaki gw masih mejejak tanah!! hehehe

Lihatlah betapa pendeknya itu runway... >.<

Tadinya, gw pikir buat landing juga gw bakal ketakutan banget... tapi.. ternyata ga juga. Gw ga takut sama sekali buat landing, bahkan landing gw bisa dibilang perfect. Gw bisa berdiri, stop, dan ga goyah sama sekali. Ga tau juga kenapa, mungkin karena gw udah excited sama paragliding jadi gw lebih berani dan bisa. hehehe

Yup, I enjoyed paragliding ^^

who are you? // Siapa kamu?

2008-11-04T15:38:00.003+01:00

Who are you?
you've been visiting me
but I don't know you

you left no marks
no signs
no words
no tracks
only something

something
that keeps bothering me
that makes me wonder
no hope
but thoughts

you said no hello
and no good bye

I don't even know
whether you knock the door
or not
you always come
when I'm not there

you left nothing
that would make me know
who you are

only something
of someone been there

there's no witness
there's a lot of possibilities
there are thousands of people
that could be you

Siapa kamu?
yang menjengukku

kau pergi dan datang
tanpa kata
tanpa jejak
tanpa suara
tanpa tanda

hanya sesuatu
yang kau pajang di depanku
sesuatu
yang mewakili jutaan penduduk
yang mengusikku
membangkitkan khayalku

akankah kau baca kataku?
akankah kata ini mengusikmu?
seperti sesuatu mengusikku?

kau selalu ada
dikala ku tak ada
seakan kau sudah sadar
kesempatan kau manfaatkan
seakan kau perhatian
dan aku tidak

bila kau perhatian
tunjukkanlah
jangan buatku penasaran
buatku merana
buatku menebak
tanpa arah

tunjukkan dirimu
jangan kau malu
kuhanya ingin tahu

--------------------------
gini deh klo lagi kegandrungan puisi
padahal ini lagi minggu ujian
besok masih ujian
masih harus buat report
aku ngapain????
nulis puisi
^^

Bodohnya gw

2008-11-03T13:44:00.003+01:00

Ntah kenapa gw ini bego ya kadang-kadang.
Trus nyadarnya telat lagi....

hiks hiks
Masa tadi gw exam gw ga perhatiin tuh soal bener" sih????
Udah ngerasa kok aneh... soalnya kurang lebih sama dengan yang pertama, tapi tetep aja masa bodoh dan kerjain tuh soal dengan tenangnya. Saat sesudah waktu kurang dari 5 menit... barulah mataku itu menangkap 1 kata yang membuat semua penjelasan panjang lebarku sia-sia....
REGISTRATION!!!!!!!
dan yang gw buat adalah RESERVATION!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Tidak!!!!!!!!!!

Bodoh! Bodoh! Bodoh!
Tolol! Bego! Dungu!

Bisa-bisanya aku ga perhatiin soal!!
dan soal essay ini nilainya 20 out of 100
20!!!
Dan passing grade nya tuh 70!!
Kalo kalian kalkulasi... jelas banget kan, max score yang bisa gw dapet itu cuma 80 dan passing gradenya tuh 70!!!
my God.... kemungkinan besar, gw ga pass T.T
T.T
T.T
hilang sudah kesempatan medapat nilai bagus
remuk sudah angan menggapai honour

dan yang lebih mengesalkan lagi....
bukan gara" gw ga mampu...
tapi gara" gw ga teliti!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
T.T

apa daya bila ingin memancing ikan,
peralatan lengkap, umpan pun siap
pancingan dipasang,
Ikan pun datang
umpan diganyang
kail ditarik dengan kencang
pancingan pun terbang
tertarik ikan...
oalah....
pancingan itu tuh dipegang loh ya bukan ditinggalin
dasar bodoh!!!!!

bulbo

2008-10-30T10:04:00.002+01:00

1)Do you always answer your phone?

yes if I realized it.. hehe

2) Its four in the morning and you get a text message, who is it?

I think it's going to be my mom, or my other friends from that side of the world ;)

3) If you could change your eye color what would it be?

dark blue? hehe I love blue so much ^^

4) Do u Like Dr Pepper ?
no

5)Do you own a digital camera?

yes

6)Have you ever had a pet fish?

yes

7) Favorite Christmas song?

um.... the drummer boy? hehe

8) What's on your wish list for your birthday?

mini chaps!.. er... maybe not.. it's too long to wait for my next birthday lol
so.. it's going to be .. .. .. um.. .. I think just the money would be ok. ;)

9) Can you do push ups?

not a real push ups though lol

10) Can you do a chin up?

.. never try hehe

11)Does the future make you more nervous or excited?

both? :)

12) Do you have any saved texts? Who are they from and what do they say?

I just never erased them

13) Ever been in a spore flyer?

nope

14) Do you have an accent?

I don't think so

15) What is the last song to make you cry?

last song.. .. Because I'm a girl?

16) Plans tonight?

french restaurant

17)Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom?

yeah sure

18) Name 3 things you bought yesterday?

train ticket, croissant for breakfast, lunch

20) Current worry?

reports, exams, and that f*****g banquet

21) Current hate right now?
tong-tong kosong!!!!!!

22) Met someone who changed your life?

everyone that passed by

23) How did you celebrate in the past New Year?

Partying in Stravinski Hall, Montreux

24) What song represents you?

Shut Up - simple plan

25) Name three people who might complete this?

um.. I, don't, know.. hehe

26) Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

yup, NOT to be a volunteer in this so individual class

27) Have you ever dated someone longer than a year?

not yet

28) Do you have any tattoo/piercing?

piercing

29) Will you be in a relationship 4 months from now?

I don't know

30) Does anyone love you?

I'm sure about that

31) Would you be a ninja?

it would be cool hehehe

32) What songs do you sing in the shower?

I don't sing in the shower, hehe

33) Ever had someone sing to you?

yes!!!! ^^ such a nice memory :)

34) When did you last cry?

yesterday

35) What is in your pocket?

don't have pocket now

36) Do you like to cuddle?

yup

37) Have you held hands with anyone today?

38) Who was the last person you took a picture of?

me!! hehe

40) How many TVs do you have in your house?

er.. in my house? 3

41) Are most of the friends in your life new or old?

old

42) Do you like pulpy orange juice?

it's ok

43) What is something your friends make fun of you for?

er... my secret admirers?? lol

44) Do you like to play Scrabble?

not really

45) What are you saving your money up for right now?

to survive until next internship without asking any money from my parents ^^

46) When is the last time you ate peanut butter and jelly?

can't remember

47) What song do you want played at your funeral?

.. never think of that. maybe my immortal? hehe

48) What were you doing 12 AM last night?

chatting with my room mate

49) What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up?

what time is it??

Kalau mau katain orang ngomong DEPAN ORANGNYA!!

2008-10-29T16:53:00.002+01:00

gw da capek banget...
bener... C.A.P.E.K.

Gw yang harusnya kelas mulai jam 2 siang
mesti bangun pagi buat kejer kereta yang sebelum jam 8 pagi.
buat apa??
buat banquet....

enak??
GA
Sekarang nih dah mulai salju, dan tau sendirilah dinginnya kayak apa. Aku harus stay di montreux 1 jam sebelum bisa ke caux dan abis dari caux aku harus stay lagi di montreux 1 jam. Trus, keliling dingin-dingin sendirian mana enak???

Begitu pulang aku dah harus siap-siap buat tes Prancis oral. Gugup??? BANGET
Untungnya tes Prancis aku masih oke.

Trus.... abis itu.....
tau????
aku dapet laporan....
MEREKA NGATA-NGATAIN AKU DI KELAS!!!!!!
Oke, emang bener banget kata pepatah

"Tong Kosong Nyaring Bunyinya"

Mereka tau apa soal kerjaan gw?
Mereka ga kerjain, mereka ga ngurus
jadi mau siapa yang urus??
Ya gw ambil alih, daripada lewat deadline trus kena deduction point lagi.

Trus mereka ngoceh soal daftar tamu. Itu daftar tamu yang jumlahnya 29 ittuuuuuuu itu buatannya Ketua Marketing gw tuhhh yang orang banyak omong tapi ga kerja kerja itu tuuuuhhhh. Gw ga ubah-ubah.

Trus mereka kesepakatan mau cuma jadi 15 orang doan. Oke, 15... Itu daftar ada 16 gara-gara apa??? Itu yang buat daftar, gw, Ketua Banquet, ma Guru Banquet, BUKAN GW SEORANG!!!!! dan trus, itu daftar naik ke 18 gara-gara ada penari yang udah kasih kita gratis, jadi kita HARUS ngundang dia 2 orang, dan itu tuh udah PROSEDUR YANG WAJIB!!

Lalu.... itu undangan kan jadinya hanya untuk 1 orang doang kan... Sejak mereka emang protesnya kayak begitu. Okay... Jadi, waktu salah satu guru yang emang cukup terpandang menerima dan menanyakan itu undangan berlaku untuk berapa orang? 1 orang ato 2? soalnya dia mau bawa istrinya. Waktu gw bilang 1 orang, MEREKA YANG PROTES lagi dan bilang, kita kasih 2 dong, masa kita cuma kasih 1???

Akhirnya, gw ma Bendahara membahas tentang siapa yang kita kasih buat 2 sama siapa yang cuma kita kasih 2. Maka naiklah itu jumlah ke 22. dan itu sudah berdasarkan persetujuan BENDAHARA. Lalu di kelas, mereka mulai lagi dengan suara nyaring hasil tong kosong itu. Maka sesudah itu, bendahara langsung bilang itu ada 2 guru kita ga perlu undang, jangan diundang, jadi gw hapuslah nama mereka. dan bendahara PUAS dengan keadaan itu. Dan itu baru KEMAREN

Lalu HARI INI mereka udah mulai lagi dengan TENG TENG TENG TENG suara tong kosong itu dan menyerang gw yang ga ada di kelas!!!!!!!!!
PENGECUT SEMUANYA!!!!!
Kalau mau memfitnah, FITNAH DEPAN ORANGNYA SEKALIAN!!
Kalau ga tau apa-apa, lebih baik TUTUP MULUT daripada CUAP CUAP
Dasar emang susah klo harus kerja sama dengan tong-tong kosong yang gunanya hanya menghasilkan suara nyaring nan memekakkan telinga.
Tong-tong yang tidak berguna, yang tidak tau apa-apa, tapi suaranya nyaring sekali...
Oke, silahkan mereka fitnah gw di depan guru, di depan temen-temen gw yang lain. TERSERAH

Emang silahkan klo ga terima gw jadi asisten banquet manajer, gw mencalonkan diri gara-gara temen-temen gw yang lain MINTA gw untuk mencalonkan diri. Jangan egois dong jadi orang, di kelas ini bukan hanya KALIAN saja, wahai tong-tong kosoooong... Ada golongan lain juga yang mau gw jadi wakil mereka. Gw tau kalian ga suka gw gara-gara gw emang bukan golongan kalian, gw manusia berambut, bermata hitam, dan kulit gw ga seputih cat tong kaliaaan. Gw juga produk dunia bagian timur dan bukan produk dunia bagian barat. Gw jarang banget yang namanya hura-hura dan minum-minum, gw emang bukan tong kosong yang memimpikan dirinya diisi oleh alkohol.

Kalau mau menyuarakan suara-suara ituuuu wahai tong-tong kosong... suarakanlah di depan ku!!! Tatap mataku!!! dan jangan asal berasumsi seenak perut tong mu itu!! Cari tau dulu sebelum cuap-cuap!!

Alone

2008-10-29T13:46:00.002+01:00

I walked in the path that we walked before
The same route
The same time
But it's not the same at all

Is it the buildings?
Is it the trees?
Is it the people?
Is it the weather?
Or is it me?

It used to be so pretty
It used to be so dazzling
But now..
It's too colorless for autumn

Is it the trees?
Is it the weather?
Or is it my heart?

I walked in the path that we walked before
The same route
The same time
But now, without you

We've parted for ages
My heart doesn't belong to you anymore
But it didn't return to me either
I don't even know where is it now

I walked alone
In a quest
To retrieve what's been lost

A Special Thing That Happened

2008-10-25T11:04:00.003+02:00

here is one of the reason why it's so hard to move on...
This long quote from my friend's blog, Febrina.
in this place and era of individualism, I really miss solidarity...
>.<

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

26th January 2007

An unforgetable day
For me, for my third grade high school classmates, and of course, for Leedwin

I was reading all unread posts I haven't read in my FS group... And I remembered one thing when it came to the post Leedwin posted...
Check this out...

Temen2ku tercinta�.. hoho�

Aq dak tw nak ngo apo lagi� Thx nn e� baek nn kalian ne galonyo.. XII p2..

The Oksida.. kompak nean.. aq dak tw lagi nak cak mano tadi tu kalo dak ado kalian2 yg Bantu aq� tahan keluar pas jam pelajran� Tahan keno marah amo Pak Kasdi.. ampe pak kasdi ngo.. kalian mau di hukum atau keluar kelas� kalian galonyo keluar.. cuman sekitar 7 uong di kelas tadi.. seluruhnyo la di lapangan bola galo.. terharu nn aq tadi�

Agung na yg biaso diem biso ampe ngorek2 rumput kaget nn aq.. katonyo ampe cak nanem padi.. thx nn yoh gung.. trus demut.. pake acara maeni batang ampe nyari2 sibuk nn.. thx yoh ketuo kelas.. trus achmed.. ampe jgk2 got.. ngorek2� thx nn e� dgn abed jg.. sibuk nn ngorek2 comberan� ampe tangannyo kotor galo e.. sorry e.. thx nn tapi� seneng nn aq punyo temen cak kalian.. trus febrina,,, masuk2 ampe ke kelas2.. sibuk jg febrina tadi dgn valent..,, lisa jg.. merin� seluruhnyo.. yg la bantu nyari khususnyo shinta yg dr awal muter2 lapangan.. trus charles cupes diowong.. seru tanyo cak mano tadi aq lari nyo.., rute lari... Aq dak nyangko kalian baek galo.. Mungkin bagi kalian ah.. cuman �jepitan� untuk apo di cari.. tapi kalian semua baek2 galo.. nyarike galo... yetty jg... dico... ampe sibuk jg nyari.. yg paling semangat.. td tu sedi nn aq.. liat kalian2 galonyo baek2 galo dgn aq.. seneng nn rasonyo dak tw lagi la nka ngo apo ttg kalian.. oh yo aq ampir lupo.. Wewe... ampe nak panggil �ipo� cak paranormal cak tu e.. klo di pikir2 geli jg.. thx nn we e... la susah2 nelpon... tapi dak masuk e?? Hwhw.. dpp la.. thx nn lah.. liat kalian galonyo... skrg be masi teringet2 aq.. ternyata kelas XIIP2 uongny baek2.. solidaritasny tinggi.. semuanyo............. aq dak biso sebuti satu per satu... thx 4 all... yg namonyo dak kusebuti thx nn e.. pokoknyo thx lah.........Thx nn e... dak ado kato2 lagi aq selain Terima kasih dgn kalian galonyo.... thx nn.... Friend 4 eva.. okey??

Keep in touch ok?

I just copied and pasted it here... It remained the same and original, fresh from the oven (hmm, not really, because it's been nearly two years =P), from Leedwin...
Yep, maybe most of you didn't understand what she talked about, or just simply you didn't know what language she was using...
Haha, it's Palembang language, and she talked about The Oksida's great effort to help her...
Now, I'll try to retell what happened that day...
26th January 2007... It was Friday, and if I'm not mistaken, we had Art class at the first and second slots in our timetable... Like usual, we always did some mess whenever art class was coming, maybe because of Mr. JM who was too kind, too patient, too good for our class... Haha...
And that day, one of my friend, Leedwin, came late to school... She didn't attend the first two hour class because of her lateness... She had to do the punishment... Yeah, a punishment with a big bunch of people that also arrived after the gate had been closed... They had to run around the football yard... The size of the football court wasn't like the one in stadium, but, believe me, it's tiring... Haha...
She joined us, if my memory is still good, nearly in the end of art class... She still chit-chatted for a while before the bell rang to transfer all of us into the second class... I forgot what class we should have had at that time, but I think the teacher didn't show up or something, so that all of us being more and more crazy: move here and there to 'socialize' (read: gossip) with others, sang together, and created some noise... Ooh, I really missed those times... >.<
Then, Leedwin realized that her hairpin was missing... She started to become very worry, and at last, you can guess, she cried... And after that, most of us noticed that something was wrong with her, gathered around her, and started kaypoh-ing...
That hairpin was very precious to her... It was from her mom, that had gone to heaven, and it was the last present she gave to Leedwin...
Some of my friends started to join her crying, some looked very worry, and some didn't care... We started to ask her the punishment route, whether she remembered anything about the hairpin, etc, etc... I can only say that we started to feel very 'Sherlock Holmes' that day... Haha...
And, we decided to go out and try to find it around the school... Actually, it could drop everywhere around the school, and the school was not small (at least, before I saw NTU)... And, disregarding thoseimpossibilities to find the hairpin, we still wanted to fight...
When we were about to leave the class, Mr. Kasdi came and confront us... He gave us choice whether we wanted to be punished or we insisted on going out in study time...
Whooolaaa... Most of us went out and left around seven people whom I didn't remember... We went to the football court, circled it, and tried to find the pin... Some looked inside the drainage path... We went here and there... Valent and I even went into Kantor Kesiswaan, asked the data od late students that day, went into classes, asked permission from the teachers inside, and informed about this lost precious hairpin... We thought that someone might be taking it if they saw it lying on the ground...
And then, the first break time bell rang... We felt very hopeless... But, we still tried... We couldn't help seeing Leedwin cry all the way... I went to Tata Usaha, used a little part of my authority as OSIS committee, I announced through the speakers about this... I hoped that the power of chain message would affect more or less... Anyone heard about this might ask and inform other and hopefully we could find the little guy...
And at last, after a long lasting search, we finally found it...
It was with Delia... She found it when they were doing the punishment... She asked some people about the thing, but noone knew... Unfortunately, she didn't ask Leedwin...
Hehe...
And the story ended happily ever after...
The day is very unforgetable...
Moral of the story:
1. It's very happy if we can help others
2. Sometimes breaking the rules is not a bad thing
3. A little act of kindness goes a long way (^_-)
4. Don't come late to school or you will lose your hairpin (lol)
Waaah, I really missed those high school days, with the same dress everyday, the same class, the same teachers, the same classes... I miss my high school time... It's irreplacable...^^
Bravo...
The Oksida (The Orang-Orang Keren Dua Belas IPA Dua)...
U're the best I've ever had
~FeN~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I also took part in this detective game, also using my authorities as OSIS committee. It was such a great issue at school. We told the sport teachers that are in the football field what was going on, so we asked permission to search there. In the end, he wasn't only given us permission, but also told the classes that were having sport lesson to help us. "JALAN keliling lapangan dengan kepala menunduk ke bawah!!!!" So... in a very short time, there are LOTS of people walked around the footbal field trying to find that little particular hair pin!!!!

The other thing that I remember vividly... is when we walked class to class, to give small announcement in every class. Trying to persuade who ever that pick that hairpin... Please.. please return it.. it's worth nothing for you, but it worth more than a million to our friend. To be honese, we actually scared that the teachers would complaint to us, because of this small matter. It's true, it's just a hairpin though it's the last present that our friend received from her late mother, but still that thing will never be replaced by anything else in the world. But the teachers respond was beyond our predictions... They didn't complain at all, they even helped us!! Us!! Who's using our studying time to go around and making this small announcements! I remembered clearly one of the speech that a teacher gave in the class. It's all about solidarity and personal value...

In the end of our 'searching'.. we realized one thing, it's not only how great our class is.. but also the solidarity that really EXIST in our school, with 1600 students and 200 staffs!!!!!!
Something that I'm really sure, that will never happen in the place where I belong now...

Miss all of you, loving all of you, wishing that our friendship and solidarity will never end.

my silly, stupid day

2008-10-23T20:45:00.002+02:00

Tadi pagi, aku harus pergi ke caux untuk liat jaket, dasi kupu-kupu, sama taplak meja. Jadi jam 8 pagi aku udah di atas kereta. Gila deh, hari Kamis yang biasanya hari bangun siangku gara-gara kelasku dimulai jam 2 siang.. hari kamis minggu ini aku mesti bangun pagi buat ngejer kereta! Terus sampe di Montreux kita harus nunggu kereta ke Caux hampir 1 jam. Jadi, aku pergi keliling aja buat cari Chianti Bottle buat dekorasi sekalian. Untung ada Michael, ketua banquet gw yang bahasa Prancisnya lumayan... klo ga.. bisa pusing juga gw coba jelasin chianti bottle ke orang-orang restoran yang emang cuma bisa bahasa Prancis. Sayang kita ga dapet, emang masih pagi sih, most of the restaurants haven't opened yet.

Trus setelah sampe di Caux, kita nunggu buat Mr. Liow selesai kelas, lalu juga mesti nunggu House Keeping yang pegang kunci, dan akhirnya agak sia-sia juga gara-gara yang pegang kunci lagi liburan. Jadi kita mesti pergi ke Caux lagi hari Rabu. But at least, kita yakin kita bakal dapet dasi kupu-kupunya, dan kita juga udah tau situasi di Caux. Waktu mau pulang.... keburu siiihhh klo mau ambil kereta yang 10 menit lagi buat ngejer kelas Fidelio. Tapi.. maleeeessss... jadii... kita putusin buat makan siang di Caux dan bolos kelas fidelio deh. hehehehehehe

Trus kita turun ke Montreux pake kereta yang sesudahnya. Sampe di Montreux, kita hunting Chianti bottles lagi, tapi emang ternyata tuh botol rare banget. Kita pergi ke resto-resto, bar-bar, dan mereka ga punya. Sampe di toko khusus wine, mereka aja bilang, itu botol susah buat dicari, blom lagi harganya mahal.. so... good luck banget dech, gitu loh. Terus, setelah hunting-hunting, ketemulah restoran yang punya chianti bottles, tapi, itu chianti emang cuma buat dekorasi, dan itu gede banget!! hampir semeter tingginya, dan itu masih ada isinya!! Jelas kita ga berani minta pinjem, soalnya, klo ada apa-apa, ga sanggup kita bayarnya. hiks hiks.. susahnya...

Ternyata, waktunya udah mepet sama waktu kereta buat balik ke sekolah, jadi kita buru-buru ke train station, soalnya kita masih ada kelas Banquet and Events, dan kita berdua manager dan asisten!!!! Ga mungkin banget klo kita mesti bolos tuh particular class!!! Eh, karena buru-buru, begitu kita sampe di peronnya, dan keretanya datang, kita langsung naik kereta. Eh... ternyata.. kita kepagian sedikit.. dan kita salah naik kereta!!! Ini kereta regional ke Villeneuve!! Jadi pas stop di Terriet, kita baru sadar, kenapa keretanya stop di sini??? Harusnya kan ga stop-stop sampe ke Aigle!!! Kita salah kereta!!!!! Lansung deh kita keluar di Terriet. Gila... bisa sebodoh itu gw!!! Bisa-bisanya gw salah naik kereta!!!!! BISA-BISANYA!!!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Dan gara-gara ini mau ga mau kita berdua bolos kelas event!! oh.. gila, gw bener-bener udah mau teriak!!!!! Begonya gw!!!!
Gw bener-bener histeris, this is the first time in my life I skip class dengan sengaja (buat fidelio), dilanjutkan dengan ketidak-sengajaan, dan bolos seharian!!!! SEHARIAN. This is my record...

Sekarang nasi sudah jadi bubur, mau dikejer pun ga bisa. So.. apa boleh buat, kita jalan balik ke Montreux. Terus, pas nunggu di train station buat kereta selanjutnya (berhubung Terrier emang agak jauh), Michael baru inget, dia lupa tanya harga buat printing yang tadi kita tanya di toko (buat invitation), itu sudah termasuk harga paper ato belom? soalnya murah banget sih, dan dia bener-bener lupa! Duh.. klo sekarang kita balik ke tokonya, kita bakal bener-bener miss event class (klo kita naik kereta, kita masih ikut kelas event setengah jam). Tapi, setelah kita pikir-pikir, kesempatan kita buat ngeprint cuma hari ini doang.. soalnya hari Selasa itu undangan udah harus disebarin.... Jadi... oke.. kita ga jadi naik kereta yang udah ada di depan mata.. Kita balik ke tempat print.

Ternyata itu harganya udah termasuk harga kertas. Wah, murah nih.. jadi.. oke, langsung deh kita print. Mana print juga ga semulus yang kita bayangkan, gara-gara lay outnya hancur gara-gara beda media, dibuat di Mac, ditampilkan di Window, jadi harus kita edit-edit lagi. Dan itu microsoft word, dalam bahasa Prancis!!! Waduuuhhhh..... gw ngeditnya bener-bener berdasarkan ingatan tampilan Ms. Word untuk mencari fitur-fitur yang harus gw pake, dan juga gambar icon. Ternyata pelajaran teori waktu SMP yang mesti ngafalin fitur-fitur Ms. Word berdasarkan tabnya berguna juga ya.. jadi cara gw, ya.. ngurutin berdasarkan hafalan hahahaha...

Akhirnya, setelah hampir 2 jam kita nongkrong di situ, kita bisa keluar tuh tempat print dengan undangan-undangan yang telah selesai. Yay!! ^^ senangnya.... Kita juga udah telepon gurunya sih, kasih tau kita lagi di tempat print buat ngeprint undangan, jadi kita ga di itung absen, yah.. walaupun yang kelas 2 jam sebelumnya diitung absen... hehehe

Terus tiba-tiba Michael bilang.. "Wait, we forgot to put the date inside"... .. .. .. .. .. .. Tau ga, betapa gw shock??? Gw sampe stop dan for more than a second I fogot to breath, even my heart fogot to beat!!! Gw shock banget!!! Terus, gw baru sadar.. rasanya tadi ada deh... dan ternyata dia emang mainin gw!!!! !@#$%^&*_)(*&^%$#.. .. .. ..
Tau betapa geregetnya gw?? Gw bener-bener da mau teriak di kuping dia! gw bener-bener da mau...... (tak terungkapkan dengan kata-kata). Gw gereget banget! Bisa-bisanya dia!!!!! Udah ini hari gw bolos seharian, emang sih dia juga.. terus kita juga tadi udah salah naik kereta, terus mesti jalan balik ke Montreux. Dan dia masih bisa-bisanya mainin gw!!!
GILA!!!

Terus akhirnya kita jalan, soalnya emang kita mesti tunggu kereta juga, dan gw mo cari hadiah ulang tahun buat Carman. Bingung sih, dan gara-gara dia suka Lion King, kita pergi ke toko anak-anak. Dan tuh Michael.. keliatan banget childishnya... gila..... dia bisa ngatain gw childish dulu, dan liat LIAT.. dia main-main kayak anak kecil! Cape deh.. Terus kita bungkus kebab buat makan malem, dan kejer kereta balik deh. Dan kita sampe di sekolah setengah 8. So.. it's really really a looooooonnnnnggg day....

But hey, look at the bright sight!! Seandainya, kita ga bolos kelas fidelio, kita bakal langsung balike ke sekolah, dan kalau gw ga salah naik kereta, gw bakal balik ke sekolah dan kalau gw balik ke sekolah... gw ga bakal ngeprint undangan!!!! So, emang semuanya udah diatur supaya kita bisa ngeprint undangan hari ini. hehehe...
^^

last prep before going

2008-10-23T07:38:00.002+02:00

today's objection:

1. go to caux in... around 15 minutes
2. negotiate the things that we can borrow
3. find chianti bottles for decorations
4. find something for carman

ok, sounds ok.
I wish everything will goes well.
I hope that our banquet and the preparations will goes smoothly
>.<

God, guide me in Your way...
^^

trap in the past

2008-10-21T21:29:00.004+02:00

Tadi siang aku dapet presentasi dari Disney tentang Marketing You. Oke, presentasi ini asyik juga, apalagi presenternya lucu, yang kesan di benakku, kayak Donald Bebek. No offense, tapi... emang lucu dianya... hahahaha

dan ada satu kalimat dari presentasi ini yang aku inget banget. "Learn from the past, then forget it. cause you know what? it's over." dan.. kalau dipikir - pikir... rasanya aku memang masih terjebak oleh masa lalu. Tapi bukan karena masa lalu yang buruk dan terus kusesali sampai sekarang yang membuat aku ga bisa maju-maju. Tapi karena masa laluku jauh lebih indah dan membuatku tersihir oleh keindahan fantasi yang tak lagi nyata, aku terkurung dalam bola kaca yang menampilkan segala keindahan yang sebenarnya telah pudar dan hilang.

Walaupun akhirnya, bola kaca itu pecah.... Aku masih terpana akan keindahannya. Dalam benakku, bola kaca itu masih utuh, masih seindah dahulu kala. Aku masih tersihir. Aku menolak untuk bergerak, dalam anganku, bola itu sewaktu-waktu dapat kembali ke wujud asalnya. Walaupun deep inside, aku sadar, hal itu tidak akan pernah jadi nyata. Tapi tetap saja angan ini terus berlanjut dan menjadi penghalang untuk bergerak. Aku terperangkap oleh masa lalu.

Dulu......
Aku dan teman-temanku itu akrab dan kompak banget. Kita bisa belajar bareng, walaupun rame, tapi asyiiiikk... Yang satu bawa soal dari tempet lesnya, yang satu bawa soal dari hasil les privat sama guru, yang satu bawa soal dari koneksi kakak kelas tahun lalu... Dari soal-soal yang terkumpul dan menumpuk dihadapan, dikerjakanlah satu-satu. Semuanya saling mengajari kalo ada yang ga dimengerti.

Salah satu yang paling berkesan waktu sehari sebelum ulangan kimia. Semuanya kumpul di rumahku, berhubung waktu itu yang mengerti kimia aku. Kita benar-benar belajar bareng, membahas bab demi bab, hukum, dan soal. Sampai-sampai mereka kumpul sampai lewat tengah malam, yang sudah mulai ditelpon orang tuanya yang mulai cemas anaknya kok ga pulang-pulang... besok ulangan lagi.... hahaha... dulu itu lucu banget, dan berkesan banget. Sampe sekarang, belom pernah aku mendapatkan teman-teman yang seperti itu lagi.... Kadang.. aku berangan.. teman-temanku dapat secara ajaib tiba di tempatku sekarang, kita kembali seperti dahulu kala... tapi.. itu semua tidak mungkin kan???

I need to get over it. I need to move on. Though the present is not as preety as Iwant it to be. nor as sweet as I dream it will be.. but there's no other way. I need to face the truth, I need to move on...

Things NOT to do:
1. day dreaming
2. read comics
3. play facebook

Things TO DO:
1. do Geography report
2. do Marketing report
3. do Housekeeping report
4. call SHMS Caux
5. talk to Mr. Ivan
6. take money
7. go to restaurants to ask for chianti bottles
8. exercise and stretching
9. learn french
10. talk about decorations, concept design
11. make sure about the invitations
12. sign up for horse riding at school

jengkellll >.<

2008-10-19T18:21:00.002+02:00

lihatlah betapa solider dan kompaknya anak-anak kelasku sekarang.....

sudah tau setiap minggu malem saatnya rapat....
tapi, tetep aja mereka ijin ma gw mereka mo pergi makan malem.
yang ijin ma gw cuma 2 orang.
tapi pas gw tanya siapa aja... jumlahnya mencapai 5 orang YANG DIA TAU, loh, lalu yang ga dia tau ada berapa banyak????????
hellooooooooo
have you ever heard the word solidarity, responsibility, consistency???

temen-temen gw selalu ngajak gw pergi makan minggu malem, tapi apa? gw selalu tolak ajakan mereka. kenapa?? karena itu waktunya meeting!!!
itu sudah kesepakatan bersama satu kelas, bahwa setiap minggu malem adalah saatnya rapat kelas. ok dong, kita udah buat kesepakatan, hormati kesepakatan yang telah kalian buat sendiri!!!!
jangan seenak jidat melakukan hal-hal yang kalian sukai sendiri!

susah banget ya rasanya kerja sama dengan orang-orang yang ga peduli sama orang lain. orang-orang yang hanya peduli sama diri mereka sendiri!!
yang merasa fine-fine aja waktu orang lain mengorbankan kepentingan mereka sendiri, dan mereka tetap tidak perduli.
rasanya kehidupan di sini itu memang sangat sangat individualistis, yang kalau mendapatkan celah untuk memanfaatkan orang, ga akan mereka lewatkan. yang namanya kepentingan pribadi itu diatas segala-galanya.
munafik kan orang-orang kayak gini??
sayangnya model orang-orang kayak gini banyak banget di dunia ini...

rasanya aku kangen banget sama masa-masa SMA, yang teman-temanku kenal dan mengerti yang namanya solidaritas, tanggung jawab, dan konsistensi.
aku sekarang menghargai banget saat-saat yang aku lewatkan di latpim dulu. mempelajari hal-hal yang sebenarnya penting banget dalam kerja sama. sayangnya, tidak semua orang sadar akan pentingnya sikap-sikap itu.

(sigh........)

seandainya saja....
kalian teman-teman SMA ku, di sini untuk melaksanakan banquet ini.....
aku yakin....
semua masalah ini tidak akan pernah ada
aku ga akan pernah merasakan kekesalan dan depresi seperti ini
semuanya akan penuh canda tawa
seperti dulu.....
sayang waktu tak dapat berjalan mundur
dan semua tidak terjadi sesuai dengan keinginan dan maksud hati
apa daya kalau harus merana

kita hanya dapat terus berusaha
dan berjuang

my sunday

2008-10-19T16:34:00.007+02:00

duuuh

dasar moood ini ga bisa diajak kompromi sama sekali ya...
hari ini...

kemaren...

seharusnya aku mengerjakan report yang bakal di due minggu depan.
but.....
I ended up reading comics, taking pictures..
(sigh....)
and today...
I made a promise before to help the painting of le grand peinture.
and it's really fun!!! ^^
ga tau kenapa akhir" ini emang mood seniku lagi berkobar-kobar, kemaren" aja waktu ada temenku yang lagi kepengen digambarin badannya, aku langsung menawarkan diri dengan senang hati.
semangat seni lagi menyala, ada media minta digambar, kenapa tidak???
hehehe

tadi, jujur aku ga gitu tau juga sih mau lukis apa....
tapi akhirnya goresan" cat itu membentuk sesuatu dengan sendirinya.
yah, walaupun dengan jujur aku akui, gambarku itu tidak bagus" amat, apalagi klo sudah dibandingkan dengan gambarnya orang" yang emang pelukis di situ..
rasanya malu dan juga ada rasa bersalah, rasanya gambarku itu merusak karya mereka...
tapi.......
ini memang lukisan yang ditujukan untuk umum, tujuan lukisan ini adalah pemernyatu segala macam budaya dan bangsa yang exist di desa kecil tempat tinggalku sekarang ini.
dan juga mereka juga mengundang anak" untuk ikut berpartisipasi, ya.. yang namanya lukisan anak"..
jadi... aku lebih pede dikit sih.
hahahahaha

ok deh,
habis ini.... aku harus print questionaire buat rapat nanti malem, ini questionaire evaluasi for the managers. so, got to prepare myself for critics. I know it's good for me, and it is essential. but still, critics are never easy, but it's part of life. so.... let's face it! hehehe
coz if you run and run away... someday, you'll not have any other place to run, and on that time... you can't do anything..

after that, of course... I really really really need to start my project!!!!
geography will be due next week
marketing the week after
plus event presentation!!
then...
Mid term exams!!!!!!!!
though only 4 exams now..
thanks for those projects as subtitude for the exams.
at this exam, I still have house keeping project anyway.
sooo, time to do the projects!!!!
read the books for references...